Wednesday, March 26, 2014

Just Thought You Might Like to See My New Ke$ha Pin! Also, What Should We Do in Baltimore?

Posted by on Wed, Mar 26, 2014 at 1:42 PM

Go ahead and get in there.
Good afternoon! We were just rolling through the US when BOOM! So much snow! Nooooo! First Virginia, then D.C., now Baltimore—colder than I packed for, definitely colder than Seattle even was when we left. To make myself feel better, I bought a grape-colored sweater and KE$HA PIN. (I'm not ready to drop the dollar sign from her name just yet.)

Jealous, Paul Constant?

So, what should we do in Baltimore? Does anyone have a hot tip on a good place to eat or a cool museum or fun thing to do?


Comments (30) RSS

Oldest First Unregistered On Registered On Add a comment
Baltimore? Holy fuck, get the hell out of there. I lived there way too long and regret every minute of it.
Posted by Happiness is Baltimore, MD in your rearview mirror on March 26, 2014 at 1:48 PM · Report this
Posted by decidedlyodd on March 26, 2014 at 1:50 PM · Report this
Was just in Baltimore:
Faidley's crab cakes in Lexington market
Edgar Allen Poe's grave
Walter art museum
and the library at the Peabody Institute.
Posted by c on March 26, 2014 at 1:53 PM · Report this
museum: American Visionary Art Museum.
good place to eat: Liquid Earth.
Posted by eminsea on March 26, 2014 at 1:54 PM · Report this
Eat Bertha's mussels.
Posted by gnossos on March 26, 2014 at 1:58 PM · Report this
Nieuw Hollander 6
OK, I know Baltimore, or at least did a dozen years ago.

The Mount Royal Tavern is extremely legit. Check out the ceiling (a replica of the Sistine Chapel's, painted by a student from the adjacent Maryland Institute decades ago in exchange for a lifetime of free beer - true story.) Well curated jukebox. Food is limited to bar pizza from a little countertop oven (if they still have it. Of course you should get it.) My fondest memory there is of it being the only place open for a mile around after a 12" snowstorm. The bartender gave out home-made cherry bombs to everyone who came in. Rock fucking solid.

The Brewer's Art if you like belgian-style beers a whole lot and don't care about much else. But if you do, this is the place to go.

Club Charles for crippling cocktails and no bullshit. You probably won't run into John Waters here, but you might.

The Owl Bar is swanky but has both adequate food and good beer. I like it late at night.

Fuck it, go to them all. That's what I'd do. Baltimore is seriously underrated.

Also, the American Visionary Art Museum aka the outsider art museum. It is seriously worth checking out. Do that first then go get drunk at the MRT.

Fuck crab cakes, the peabody, the lexington market, etc. Seattle got all that tourist shit already. Really.
Posted by Nieuw Hollander on March 26, 2014 at 2:01 PM · Report this
American Visionary Art Museum. At night, eat in Mt Vernon (e.g. Helmand, owned by Hamid Karzai's brother). Drinking / shows in Lower Fells Point. Shed a tear for the Baltimore City Paper, which was just bought by the Sun.
Posted by A Baltimoron on March 26, 2014 at 2:01 PM · Report this
mikethehammer 8
I'm with @1. I lived there for several years and am honestly struggling to come up with much of anything to recommend. The Visionary Art Museum referenced above always had some real neat installations (they'd dedicate shows to things produced by prisoners or institutionalized folks, etc, some pretty neat stuff) but then I just tried going to their website and was redirected to a search page, so am not even sure it still exists.

I'd probably take a stroll through Hampden, which has some nice places to eat & drink and where you'll probably recognize some landmarks from John Waters films.
Posted by mikethehammer on March 26, 2014 at 2:01 PM · Report this
passionate_jus 9
Go to the historic Lexington Market. It's not in the best part of town but who cares? It's where the locals eat. It's got great food from all over the world plus awesome oyster bars. And it's not that expensive.
Posted by passionate_jus on March 26, 2014 at 2:04 PM · Report this
Posted by Max Solomon on March 26, 2014 at 2:05 PM · Report this
passionate_jus 11
Also go see Edgar Allen Poe's grave and museum.
Posted by passionate_jus on March 26, 2014 at 2:06 PM · Report this
Nieuw Hollander 12
Oh yeah, Hampden has some good spots too. The Golden West was good eats. Really though the best things in Baltimore are the bars and the people in them. At least, that's my recollection.

I don't mean to hate on the Lexington Market - locals go too, just like the Pike Place Market. It's also a tourist destination, just like the Pike Place Market. (Or the Granville Market in Vancouver, or the St. Lawrence Market in Toronto.) Just saying if you're pressed for time and you're not super into city markets and you've been to one before, it won't change your life.
Posted by Nieuw Hollander on March 26, 2014 at 2:12 PM · Report this
Nieuw Hollander 13
Oh yeah, MRT is cash-only. I almost forgot about that. You should still go. I wish I could go there right now.
Posted by Nieuw Hollander on March 26, 2014 at 2:16 PM · Report this
mikethehammer 14
And though my time there was mostly forgettable, I can't really disagree with anything from @6 either (and maybe it was only so forgettable because I spent so much time at all those fucking bars.)
Posted by mikethehammer on March 26, 2014 at 2:16 PM · Report this
Gurldoggie 15
The Visionary Art Museum is really wonderful. Don't miss it.
Posted by Gurldoggie on March 26, 2014 at 2:31 PM · Report this
Fells has some good bars. Max's is a beer lovers destination. Heavy Seas Ale House is the bar of Heavy Seas brewery (get loose cannon). Cat's eye and ledbetters always have live music.

Mt Vernon, Owl bar above is nice and historic, brewer's art is delicious, and gayborhood is there so could hit up hippo, central, or leons.

Hamden is ok, but cutesy. some really good food though, I second Golden West.

Avam is still there and now has a great locavore restaurant, mr rains funhouse, above it. Highly recommended, but both are expensive compared to the other free museums in the city.

Also, look up theatre project, this weekend they have "The Homo Poe Show." I'll be there.

And if you are around monday, it's opening day, all of downtown and fed hill will be pretty amazing, if you like the opening day crowds, otherwise stay far far away! (which actually is a pretty true statement about fed hill).
Posted by Samr on March 26, 2014 at 2:35 PM · Report this
Fnarf 17
Go to Oldtown Mall with an expensive video camera, a Confederate flag t-shirt, and a hundred dollar bill hanging out of your back pocket.
Posted by Fnarf on March 26, 2014 at 2:46 PM · Report this
Brewer's art! Golden West! American Visionary Museum! Avocado milkshakes at the cafe at the American Visionary Museum!
Posted by whiskeypony on March 26, 2014 at 3:01 PM · Report this
J. Lasser 19
Lived in Baltimore for 8 or 9 years, loved it. @6 is spot-on, though a decade ago at least the Brewers Art had great food upstairs as well as my favorite basement bar in town. (The rosemary-garlic fries are worth remembering, and their beers are stellar.)

Baltimore is definitely a drinking town, and Brewer's and Owl Bar are only half a block apart, so if you're pressed for time just do that.
Posted by J. Lasser on March 26, 2014 at 3:15 PM · Report this
matt 20
Emily you have to tell us if you ended up doing any of this stuff.
Posted by matt on March 26, 2014 at 4:25 PM · Report this
More traditional day stuff, if you're stuck tomorrow:
The Walters Art Gallery has a large collection of ancient art. The Cone Collection (friends of Gertrude Stein) at the Baltimore Art Museum has an unparalleled collection of turn-of-the-(last)-century art, especially Matisse. And if you're into trains, the B&O Museum (not far from the Poe Grave) has 'em all, back to the oldest.
No crabs, they're not in season. Oysters galore.
Posted by Biologist in the stix on March 26, 2014 at 4:33 PM · Report this
Oh my god, DO NOT go to Golden West. What is wrong with people? That place sucks (unless, of course, you want to pay top dollar for shitty food). A block away from there is Food Market, which is even topper dollar, but is actually worth the money.

Golden West is the kind of place which, if it were in a top tier city, would be out of business within a year, but since it's in Baltimore it thrives. We've got a lot of those.
Posted by MRM on March 26, 2014 at 4:43 PM · Report this
Go eat at THE HELMAND -, incredible, tasty Afghan food! Plus it's near one of America's most phallic monuments and the Walter's Art Gallery.

And like many have mentioned the Visionary Art Museum is well worth a visit.
Posted by mr.sudbury on March 26, 2014 at 5:02 PM · Report this
I was just there a few weeks ago and went to the Belvedere Square Market with a friend - its got a bunch of different merchants and even a wine shop where they will bring you food from all over the market (and free parking). The Senator movie theater is right next door - even if you don't go in for a movie, they (used to?) have designs of John Waters movies on the sidewalk outside.
Posted by bmore on March 26, 2014 at 6:54 PM · Report this
Philly 25
Blacks in Wax museum!!
Posted by Philly on March 26, 2014 at 7:07 PM · Report this
Philly 26
Ps are you coming to philly next? I want to see your show!
Posted by Philly on March 26, 2014 at 7:08 PM · Report this
Ernie1 27
If you're there on Monday go to the Orioles home opener against the Red Sox.

When I was there a couple years ago I had to work most of the time, but I got to sneak away to see the Mariners beat the Orioles from four rows behind home plate at Camden Yards on a 95 degree day with a light rain. One of the most memorable games I've seen.
Posted by Ernie1 on March 26, 2014 at 10:07 PM · Report this
#23 nails it, the Helmand is fantastic. Owned by Hamid Kharzai's brother, Qayum Karzai, Helmand serves delicious Afghan fare in a casual yet elegant room. The MICA is worth a visit SALT in East Baltimore is both excellent and in a neighborhood worth exploring.

The Peabody Library is more mind-blowing, nothing in Seattle remotely touches it. Yes to the Visionary too. I was raised at the Club Charles, 100% Baltimore. Walk around the Olmstead designed Roland Park neighborhood. Stop by Artifact Coffee on the way.

Avoid the "Inner Harbor", little Italy and even most of Fells Point. Drive along North Avenue and see the lingering effects of drugs, the war on drugs and failed public policy.

Baltimore is fascinating, nuanced, stately, Black, WASPy, poor, elegant, broke, broken, coming-back, slipping away, real and always worth getting to know.
Posted by thermos on March 27, 2014 at 12:48 AM · Report this
How the hell did I miss this post? I live in Baltimore! #6 Nieuw Hollander has it just about right. Peabody's awesome, too. You might try Harlan's or Rye if you like Prohibition-type cocktails as well.
Posted by PEM on March 27, 2014 at 7:51 AM · Report this
Emily Nokes 30
Thanks for the hot tips everyone!

I actually like Baltimore and wish we could have hung around longer! We've only played there once before, but the wild vibe is nice in small doses. Did see Poe's grave, there were no spooky séances happening. MRT is in fact legit! Did much drinking, played a place called Metro Gallery, tried to walk around the neat neighborhoods but couldn't deal with the cold—it was freezing! Killer Trash was great (reportedly one of John Waters' favorite thrift stores?), and I got a couple Star Trek zines at Atomic Books.

@26 - We play Philly tomorrow! At a place called the Golden Tea House!
Posted by Emily Nokes on March 27, 2014 at 11:22 AM · Report this

Add a comment


Want great deals and a chance to win tickets to the best shows in Seattle? Join The Stranger Presents email list!

All contents © Index Newspapers, LLC
1535 11th Ave (Third Floor), Seattle, WA 98122
Contact | Privacy Policy | Terms of Use | Takedown Policy