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  • Derek Erdman

When I learned people put Icy Hot on their junk for sexual purposes, I thought, wouldn't it be hellishly painful, like getting oral from a piece of duct tape? And then I thought: What if I've just discovered a new way to stave off Old Man Winter? I texted the most pain-loving person I could think of, who confirmed searing pain is the desired effect. I then did some googling—I believe the phrase I searched was "Icy Hot on cunt."

The first thing that turned up was a YouTube video of a group of young guys (none of whom appeared to have cunts) sitting around in a room with a couch, a Confederate flag, a bowling trophy, and a framed picture of a couch. They explained they were all going to put Icy Hot on their balls. One announced, "I'm gonna rub it all over my wiener and everything." They all scooped the ointment between their legs and then sat on their couch under their couch photo. It hit all of them at once, and the only guy who didn't run for the bathroom said, "I put it on my leg. They're dumbasses."

I found one YouTube video starring a woman who applied Icy Hot without knowing what it was. She also claimed she bought it at "The Stupid Store." She hopped around looking alarmed, but she didn't seem turned on at all.

In hopes of finding some more risqué Icy Hot videos, I did the same search on XTube...

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