SL Letter of the Day: Help a Bi Guy Out, Seattle?
by Dan Savage
on Wed, Aug 28, 2013 at 5:01 PM
I'm a bi male in my mid twenties, just starting my career, and I grew up in a conservative town. I've been fairly enlightened through education and travel and I'm finally in a place where I accept my bisexuality. I work internationally and in many places where I work it is unsafe to be out. If I got caught in a homosexual relationship it would mean jail time. So I go into default mode most of the time—allowing people to assume I'm heterosexual—for both safety and career reasons. The main reason I'm writing you is because the few times I've been in Seattle, a place where it is supposed to be safe to be out, I find it hard to meet bi-friendly gay people or other bi people. My straight friends seem to be more understanding than my gay friends. On top of that, I've always wanted to go out as a transvestite with friends. The problem is I feel like I don't have a safe group to go out with, I'm under time constraints, and I'm afraid it might get back to some of my international colleagues.
Besides gay bars, are there places in Seattle where I could meet like-minded people, and go out for a night or two with the girls and try it out?
Sent From My iPhone
My response after the jump...
Sorry about the shitty gay dudes you've had the misfortune of meeting here in Seattle. We fags tend to be at our shittiest about bi guys when we're in our mid-twenties—lord knows I was (there's a whole chapter about it my shitty bi shit in my new book)—but you'll hopefully find that it gets better, la de da, as your gay peers age out of their shittyshit stages.
As for non-gay bars or clubs in Seattle where you could "go out as a transvestite" and mingle with cool-about-the-bi-thing people who aren't going to rat you out on Facebook or Instagram and get you in trouble professionally or internationally... I got nothing. But maybe someone reading Slog knows of a whoopee spot where the peeps are cool and the girls are hot and all that jazz.
Anyone know a place like that? Share the details with SFMi in the comments thread, Sloggers.
And, hey, now that the song is stuck my head, I gotta hear it. The Broadway revival with Bebe Neuwirth, the Best-Picture-Oscar-winning movie version with Catherine Zeta-Jones—whatever. Chita sang it best in the original Broadway production...