Water That's So Murky a Drowning Victim Is Lost for Three Hours: At the Quality Inn & Suites Seattle Center.

It Wasn't Just Malala: The Taliban continues its violent work to keep girls out of school in Pakistan.

Ireland Finally Allows Abortions: Only when a woman's life is in danger or she is suicidal.

Riveting Photograph: Of Edward Snowden requesting asylum in Moscow.

Meanwhile, Microsoft Is Happy: To comply with the NSA's invasive requests.

While We're Meanwhiling: Russia prosecutes its first dead guy. A Kremlin critic. Dead guy 0, Kremlin 1.

Rifts Among Syrian Rebels: A Free Syrian Army commander is killed at a checkpoint by rival rebels. He was backed by the West and Arab worlds, his killers by Al Qaeda.

How Will Mandela's Life End?: Is it over already? On pulling the plug.

Prison Break in Indonesia: A riot over conditions, now hundreds on the run.

Typhoon in China: 200 missing or dead.

San Diego Mayor: Says "I need help," and that he has failed to respect the women around him, after sexual harassment accusations against him.

Nearly Naked Woman Escaping Her Alleged Rapist: A Florida couple refuses to let her into their home. Then the alleged rapist, who is alleged to have raped her repeatedly, is found with a "known prostitute" in his car.

Um, Everyone Gets Texts from Obama, Jay: Jay-Z thinks he's special.

Keep Your Dirty Wheelchair: Off our museum carpets.

Obviously, today's video can be nothing but the trailer for Sharknado, below. As Steve Sanders say, "Not the plumbing. THE OCEAN."

But first, you really need to see that Mia Farrow and Philip Roth got involved with Sharknado last night. Together. And they Tweeted about it. How did this transpire? Did they plan to watch Sharknado?

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