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Saturday, April 27, 2013

A Coen Brothers Movie, Unfortunately Directed by Michael Bay

Posted by on Sat, Apr 27, 2013 at 11:09 AM

  • Beefcake! BEEFCAAAAKE!

Somewhere out there in an alternate universe, I'd like to think that Pain & Gain was directed by the Coen brothers. It's a premise that seems ideal for them: the true story of a team of lunkheaded Florida bodybuilders who decide to kidnap a wealthy deli owner and hold him hostage until he agrees to sign over his fortune. The story gets weirder, ultimately involving a porn magnate, a retired private detective, several bushelsful of severed body parts, and a whole lot of stupid choices.

But for whatever reason—karmic punishment?—we live in a universe where Michael Bay directed Pain & Gain. This is not entirely a bad thing: Bay's coked-up camerawork and obscene overuse of filters, slow motion, and other directorial trickery work pretty well with the idiocy on display in the story. The problem comes, as it usually does, with Bay's sense of humor...

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