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Thursday, March 21, 2013

Teabagger Wisdom for Children

Posted by on Thu, Mar 21, 2013 at 3:27 PM

If there's one thing kids love, it's being lectured about out-of-control spending:

“Once upon a penny, in the Land of Us, in the little town of Meville, lived a little penny. In fact, a whole lot of little pennies were scattered all over the Land of Us, but our story is about one particular penny: Mr. Penny.
He was a singular fellow, quite an individual and not a follower of the crowd.”

The antagonist, a dragon designed to represent a bloated federal government, won’t stop growing and loves to eat currency.

“In fact, he developed a taste for charred bills … dollar bills. Within no time, the dragon had devoured $15 Trillion and was always looking around for more to consume.”

You can buy Mr. Penny and the Dragon of Domeville from your local independent bookseller.

(Via Reading Is for Snobs.)


Comments (15) RSS

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The thing I find most weirdly impressive about the mentality of teabagger deficit-obsessives like this is their ability to say things like "devoured $15 Trillion" without ever for a moment asking where that money went, who paid it, who benefited from it, and who made those decisions, so as to avoid any uncomfortable answers. Amazing mental "flexibility".
Posted by Moag on March 21, 2013 at 3:41 PM · Report this
ArtBasketSara 2
I wonder if there is a fallen land to the north of the "Land of Us" (let's call it the "Land of Can") where the whole race of "Penny" is facing genocide...
Posted by ArtBasketSara on March 21, 2013 at 3:45 PM · Report this
Pope Peabrain 3
Put out a book called "Mr Bushels" and his tons of money spent in a land called "Stupid Warville". That's a book I'd buy!
Posted by Pope Peabrain on March 21, 2013 at 3:45 PM · Report this
DickDave 4
Do Me Ville?
Posted by DickDave on March 21, 2013 at 3:48 PM · Report this
delirian 5
I'm a little disappointed by this story. They could have gotten so much more mileage from an alternate story where taking pennies from rich people makes Jesus sad.
Posted by delirian on March 21, 2013 at 3:48 PM · Report this
sperifera 6
This is ridiculous. Everyone knows that the home-schooled children in Teabaghistan can't read.
Posted by sperifera on March 21, 2013 at 4:05 PM · Report this
pg13 7
I thought my 3 year old son would love to watch some "Schoolhouse Rock"--after all, I loved "Unpack Your Adjectives" and "3 Is a Magic Number", "Conjunction Junction" etc.

Put in the DVD, hit random...and watched this (which I don't remember from my childhood.)
(Schoolhouse Rock--Tyrannosaurus Debt)

...and my dinosaur-obsessed 3 year old loves it.
Posted by pg13 on March 21, 2013 at 4:24 PM · Report this
rob! 8
Reminds me of Callista Gingrich's "Ellis the Elephant" pathetic two-mints-in-one American-exceptionalism-for-toddlers/air-kisses-to-John-Ellis-(JEB)-Bush books.
Posted by rob! on March 21, 2013 at 5:11 PM · Report this
venomlash 9
@7: Tyrannosaurus Debt is a pretty decent bit of education. It doesn't go into the pros of having a debt and the cons of having a HUGE debt, but it's not particularly slanted. No More Kings is the real bag-o-crap in America Rock.
Posted by venomlash on March 21, 2013 at 6:15 PM · Report this
Urgutha Forka 10
If it's like other libertarian books, it's probably thousands of pages long and Mr. Penny delivers an abstract monologue about the virtues of selfishness for half of it before raping some woman who later proclaims her respect and admiration for Mr. Penny taking what he wants.
Posted by Urgutha Forka on March 21, 2013 at 6:25 PM · Report this
Pmasp 11
“In fact, he developed a taste for charred bills … dollar bills." WHOA didn't see that coming. What incredible wordplay. I thought he was talking about oh i don't know duck bills? but kids LOVE that kind of wit.
Posted by Pmasp on March 21, 2013 at 8:08 PM · Report this
GeneStoner 12
Good Idea ! You have to start kids pretty young to teach them the right stuff. Like "don't spend more than you earn."

If the kids get to Liberal-infested public school before getting a good intellectual base, the slow/painless Dumbocrat lobotomy, known as "indoctrination" will take place.

Posted by GeneStoner on March 21, 2013 at 10:10 PM · Report this
Posted by venomlash on March 21, 2013 at 10:55 PM · Report this
@13 Where do you find this stuff?!
Posted by floater on March 21, 2013 at 11:15 PM · Report this
venomlash 15
@14: 4chan or its redheaded stepchildren Reddit and tumblr.
Posted by venomlash on March 22, 2013 at 9:09 AM · Report this

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