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Thursday, March 14, 2013

The Ramen Rater Hits 1000 Reviews

Posted by on Thu, Mar 14, 2013 at 3:26 PM

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  • facebook.com/theramenrater
Posted by Chow intern Kim Fu.

When Hans Lienesch was 12 years old, a trip to the International District Uwajimaya changed his life. Their massive selection of instant noodles—a vision!—is the origin of the Ramen Rater, which posted its 1,000th review today, on Lienesch’s 38th birthday. (He now lives in Edmonds, within walking distance of a 99 Ranch and a Boo Han Market, though people all over the world mail him packets to try.)

The Rater doesn’t just pour boiling water into a foam cup and call it a day, though. His photos look closer to the picture on the packet itself, served on real dishes with the appropriate accompaniments: meat, fresh veggies, runny eggs. In his 1,000th review, for example, of Maruchan Yakisoba Beef Taco Flavor—probably horrific if eaten straight out of the microwave, as most people would—the noodles are drained and served with spiced ground beef, minced garlic, tortilla chips, iceberg lettuce, cheese, tomatoes, sour cream, and homemade guacamole. “Awesome!” he exclaims. “Tastes kind of like chili cheese fries!” Beef Taco scores 4.25 stars out of five. To those who complain about his impure methodology, his website responds: “I’m eating this as a meal—this ain’t no wine tasting, people!”

While one wonders if he’s checked his sodium levels lately, you have to admire his dedication: Of the 1,000 reviews, 943 were written after June of 2010, when he abandoned the ramen-unfriendly Atkins diet, and he’s been demystifying the great wall of noodle ever since. Happy birthday and happy 1,000th, Ramen Rater!

 

Comments (10) RSS

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1
I understand eating a 30ยข ramen bowl in college but ramen in a good noodle shop is in a different stratosphere than the par-fried concoction on your grocery shelf. Maybe I haven't tried the right stuff but is it ever worth the sodium (and fat)?
Posted by Lumpmoose on March 14, 2013 at 3:38 PM
2
I hate to think what oils he's consuming. When I lived in Taiwan (last century), a company there was convicted of using reprocessed crankcase oil in its "flavor packets."
Posted by cheakamus on March 14, 2013 at 3:58 PM
Fnarf 3
Not just sodium -- a typical ramen packet has almost as much saturated fat as a Big Mac, believe it or not. The noodles are fried in oil before drying. That's why they taste good. If you're using one of the fancy bowls, there is even more oil inside the flavor packets.
Posted by Fnarf http://www.facebook.com/fnarf on March 14, 2013 at 4:13 PM
ingopixel 4
As an adult I still adore instant noodles and have been following the Ramen Rater for years. It's strangely addicting to get a new packet of noodles and search through his archives to see what he's said about it.
Posted by ingopixel on March 14, 2013 at 4:23 PM
5
Now this is SLOG reporting that I can get along with.

Shitty ramen has a special place in my heart and it's a hell of a lot more interesting (and fun!) then other, ahem, topics on the SLOG...

Unfortunately, I can't read the label on the crappiest ramen that is near and dear to me, so I can't really describe it other than to say it was really spicy and had a red package and was circular.

Still fun, though. As much as the SLOG pisses me off at times, posts like this keep me coming back. :-)
Posted by CPN on March 14, 2013 at 7:06 PM
horatiocain 6
Link is broken
Posted by horatiocain http://jerkcity.com on March 14, 2013 at 7:13 PM
7
The few recipes I could get through before becoming slightly nauseated seemed like they would be even better if you just threw out the noodles.
Also, no wonder he's so fat.
Posted by crone on March 14, 2013 at 9:14 PM
Clara T 8
OP - Are the employees of The Stranger, or whatever company owns it (Village Voice), unionized? If not you really need to get on that.
Posted by Clara T on March 14, 2013 at 10:21 PM
T 9
All this time, I thought it was Ranch 99. World shattered.
Posted by T on March 15, 2013 at 10:03 AM
10
@9: I always thought it was "Ranch 99" too! A quick Googling showed otherwise, though.
Posted by Kim Fu on March 15, 2013 at 1:39 PM

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