Slog
News & ArtsWednesday, March 13, 2013
News The Morning News: There's Still No Pope, There Might've Been Life on Mars, and Apparently Jesus Was a Shapeshifter
Posted by Megan Seling on Wed, Mar 13, 2013 at 8:14 AM
Cardinals Can't Agree on a Pope: They sent up black smoke instead of white smoke and this whole process is really fucking weird.
Jesus Was a Shapeshifter!: Maybe!
"Truth Serum" Is a Real Thing?: And the judge has approved use of it on Aurora shooter James Holmes.
Life on Mars: Curiosity dug up some dirt that has all necessary ingredients to support primitive life.
Good Job, New Zealand: "Lawmakers voted overwhelmingly in favor of a bill allowing same-sex marriage..."
Soccer!: Sounders won! And apparently it was great? I know nothing about soccer. But, cool!
Back from the Dead: The Twinkie might survive after all.
Google's Going Bigger: The Kirkland campus is going to double in size, making room for 1,000 more employees.
Michael Boysen Is in Custody: "A Washington state man suspected of killing his grandparents was taken into custody without incident Tuesday night after a daylong standoff with police at a Lincoln City motel."
Yay, Amy Poehler!: Comedy Central has ordered the show Broad City, which Poehler produced. Amy Poehler is my best friend.
The World's Porn Habits: All presented in this neat and interactive infographic.
5
I used to think the smoke signals from the Vatican were weird, but then I realized that it's a lot more interesting that a frigging press conference.
Anyway, civil unions came to Colorado yesterday. Since it's not called marriage it's not full marriage equality (the bastards got a marriage amendment on our too-easy-to-amend constitution back when they could still win those elections), but I believe all the rights and privileges of marriage are covered. Does Slog not care about the march of LGBT progress anymore?
Anyway, civil unions came to Colorado yesterday. Since it's not called marriage it's not full marriage equality (the bastards got a marriage amendment on our too-easy-to-amend constitution back when they could still win those elections), but I believe all the rights and privileges of marriage are covered. Does Slog not care about the march of LGBT progress anymore?
6
And what's up with the West's obsession with teen porn? It's the #1 or 2 hit in every western state except California, where it's # 3.
7
Nobody expected white smoke on the first vote, Ms. Selling. And the faithful prefer puffs of smoke rather than giant reader boards in St. Peter's Square and network anchor sky booths in the Basilica. That would be weird.
I suggest you rent 'Shoes of the Fisherman'.
I suggest you rent 'Shoes of the Fisherman'.
10
I love that the top three porn results for Switzerland are: 1: Swiss, 2: German, 3: Swissfuckers. I see no other countries that are as self-referential.
11
@5:
I was disappointed with all the differences listed between civil unions and marriage, most of which seem to be because civil unions aren't federally recognized as equal to marriage.
Hopefully we can get that damn 2006 Colorado constitutional amendment removed sometime in the future.
I was disappointed with all the differences listed between civil unions and marriage, most of which seem to be because civil unions aren't federally recognized as equal to marriage.
Hopefully we can get that damn 2006 Colorado constitutional amendment removed sometime in the future.
12
@10: Oops, I should have said "no other European countries. Damn, the Japanese like to watch themselves.
13
@ 10, Mexico has lots of "Mexican" references to their searches, but the thing that jumped out at me is that five of the top ten searches, including the number one overall, were for gay porn. (The 2nd overall search is for someone named Lisa Ann, who appears to be Mexican. FWIW.)
14
@ 11, if such things aren't struck down with DOMA (and I'm not sure that they would be - someone raised the possibility somewhere, but it didn't sound like a constitutional expert's opinion), I believe we can repeal it by popular vote by 2018. I think someone is already trying to get it placed on the ballot for 2014.
17
Peru, Chile, and Venezuela all have mostly gay porn search terms in their top 10 results. Are str8 guys that curious over there?
18
If Twinkies return, they will be undead zombies. Haven't we learned anything from "Pet Semetary"?
19
Negative, Ms. Seling, there is no indication Google will be hiring more employees, just more foreign visa scab workers --- your obligation, since you mentioned the word "employees" thus presenting the image of Google hiring more American workers is to thoroughly track their hiring process, to see specifically if they do indeed hire any more American workers, or simply more foreign visa scab workers! (Get to it, girl!!!!!!)
The State of America: 2013
or, its unholy, wilful and militant ignorance
The other day, CNN's talking stooge, Soledad O'Brien, did a story on Mandriant (you know, that "computer security company" which claims China is hacking into everything) and never once mentioned the bank which finances them (or that one of that bank-connected persons sits upon Mandriant's board of directors). Obviously, back in 1960 such an obvious question would have arose, yet somewhow Soledad, that complete fraud in the same vein as Chris Hayes, simply doesn't think to ask --- typical ZERO content of ALL her news broadcasts and interviews, etc., ad nauseum.
When Amy Goodman had the author of a book on ExxonMobil, again Goodman doesn't think to ask the obvious question: who the bloody hell owns that oil behemoth?
(Oh, by the way, the same people which own JPMorgan Chase, which finances Mandriant --- got that, doucheys?)
Such obvious and blatant questions would once have been asked by in 1960, when some people actually had an inkling as to who owned these bloody criminal corporations in America!
Now, if JPMorgan Chase finances and has an individual sitting on the BoD of Mandriant, and JPMorgan has paid over 200 criminal penalties (truly palty sums, BTW) for financial fraud over the past twelve years (just check out the SEC's litigation releases, doucheys), then why the bloody hell would any sane and thinking citizen believe ANYTHING Mandriant claims?????
[Personally, how could any rational person care about this after Korporate Amerika and the US government offshored all those jobs, all that technology we created here (and in other countries), and all that investment to the Totalitarian Capitalist State (and major organ harvester and anti-democracy killer), China, and not expect such to happen???????????]
Update on America's super-criminals: Billionaire John Paulson, that slime who got together and colluded with Goldman Sachs to create crappy CDOs which were designed to fail, then purchased credit default swaps in the millions of dollars (THEIR unregulated insurance) with payouts in the billions of dollars when the CDOs failed --- reference Abacus CDO and the SEC's investigation) plans to relocate -- on paper, that is -- to Puerto Rico, to avoid paying federal taxes.
Always the criminal, always the crook, always the bankster!
(At least in Norway and Italy, they actually jail the banksters when they rip off workers' pension funds --- when has that happened in the last several decades in America????????)
More...
The State of America: 2013
or, its unholy, wilful and militant ignorance
The other day, CNN's talking stooge, Soledad O'Brien, did a story on Mandriant (you know, that "computer security company" which claims China is hacking into everything) and never once mentioned the bank which finances them (or that one of that bank-connected persons sits upon Mandriant's board of directors). Obviously, back in 1960 such an obvious question would have arose, yet somewhow Soledad, that complete fraud in the same vein as Chris Hayes, simply doesn't think to ask --- typical ZERO content of ALL her news broadcasts and interviews, etc., ad nauseum.
When Amy Goodman had the author of a book on ExxonMobil, again Goodman doesn't think to ask the obvious question: who the bloody hell owns that oil behemoth?
(Oh, by the way, the same people which own JPMorgan Chase, which finances Mandriant --- got that, doucheys?)
Such obvious and blatant questions would once have been asked by in 1960, when some people actually had an inkling as to who owned these bloody criminal corporations in America!
Now, if JPMorgan Chase finances and has an individual sitting on the BoD of Mandriant, and JPMorgan has paid over 200 criminal penalties (truly palty sums, BTW) for financial fraud over the past twelve years (just check out the SEC's litigation releases, doucheys), then why the bloody hell would any sane and thinking citizen believe ANYTHING Mandriant claims?????
[Personally, how could any rational person care about this after Korporate Amerika and the US government offshored all those jobs, all that technology we created here (and in other countries), and all that investment to the Totalitarian Capitalist State (and major organ harvester and anti-democracy killer), China, and not expect such to happen???????????]
Update on America's super-criminals: Billionaire John Paulson, that slime who got together and colluded with Goldman Sachs to create crappy CDOs which were designed to fail, then purchased credit default swaps in the millions of dollars (THEIR unregulated insurance) with payouts in the billions of dollars when the CDOs failed --- reference Abacus CDO and the SEC's investigation) plans to relocate -- on paper, that is -- to Puerto Rico, to avoid paying federal taxes.
Always the criminal, always the crook, always the bankster!
(At least in Norway and Italy, they actually jail the banksters when they rip off workers' pension funds --- when has that happened in the last several decades in America????????)
20
Interesting - 1/2 of the search terms from Iran are gay-related. Armenia has Kim Kardashian as #9 (shudder)
Sad is that Turkey and India both have rape listed but not surprising for the way that they treat women
Sad is that Turkey and India both have rape listed but not surprising for the way that they treat women
22
@13: Maybe they just like bubble butt MILFs.
Fun fact:
Lisa Ann was the actress who played Sarah Palin in that Hustler porn they made when she was running for VP.
Fun fact:
Lisa Ann was the actress who played Sarah Palin in that Hustler porn they made when she was running for VP.
23
And speaking of Google. . .
http://tech.slashdot.org/story/13/03/13/…
"When Aaron Swartz tapped into MIT's network and scooped up data from one non-profit company, the U.S. Attorney threatened him with 35 years in prison and a $1 million fine. So what kind of jail time did 38 Attorneys General threaten Google with for using its Street View cars to scoop up passwords, e-mail and other personal information by tapping into the networks of their states' unsuspecting citizens? None. In agreeing to settle the case, the NY Times reports, Google is required to police its own employees on privacy issues, lecture the public on how to fend off privacy violations like the one Google perpetrated, and forfeit about 20% of one day's net income. Given the chance, one imagines that Aaron Swartz would have happily jumped at a comparable deal."
http://tech.slashdot.org/story/13/03/13/…
"When Aaron Swartz tapped into MIT's network and scooped up data from one non-profit company, the U.S. Attorney threatened him with 35 years in prison and a $1 million fine. So what kind of jail time did 38 Attorneys General threaten Google with for using its Street View cars to scoop up passwords, e-mail and other personal information by tapping into the networks of their states' unsuspecting citizens? None. In agreeing to settle the case, the NY Times reports, Google is required to police its own employees on privacy issues, lecture the public on how to fend off privacy violations like the one Google perpetrated, and forfeit about 20% of one day's net income. Given the chance, one imagines that Aaron Swartz would have happily jumped at a comparable deal."
24
Shape-shifting Jesus isn't new. It's called docetism, from the Greek dokeo (to seem), and it's the belief that Jesus did not have a physical body, so could appear (or not appear) in any form he chose. The text is apparently new, and I'm looking forward to reading it, but the Gospel of John is full of shape-shifting Jesus.
26
The Finnish are very wrinkle-positive.
The most interesting thing from the latest Mars report: the presence of a lot of methane and methane salts.
http://www.nasa.gov/mission_pages/mars/m…
The most interesting thing from the latest Mars report: the presence of a lot of methane and methane salts.
http://www.nasa.gov/mission_pages/mars/m…
27
The Sounders game was pretty spectacular. You're missing out if you're ignoring soccer in Seattle.
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