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Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Chow Coming Soon: Attack of the Zombie Twinkies

Posted by Paul Constant on Tue, Mar 12, 2013 at 4:43 PM

You'll have your goddamned Twinkies back by this summer, America. Now you can quit making jokes about dwindling Twinkie stockpiles and go back to your older jokes about how Twinkies would survive a nuclear apocalypse.

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Twinkies are the new Pope.

Well, if you live in Mississippi, that is.

Posted by Will in Seattle

on March 12, 2013 at 4:49 PM

For a minute there I thought you were talking about that superannuated fey cardinal from Washington, D.C. and his chances in the popestakes.

Posted by rob!

on March 12, 2013 at 4:49 PM

Oh thank heavens! I've had to make do with exactly the same snack cake made by a half dozen different brands, one of which will surely be chosen as the baker of the new twinkie.

Posted by fletc3her on March 12, 2013 at 4:59 PM

dag.. i bought 2 boxes for my girl queen schmooquan from a grocery outlet store in tigard oregon for $4.99 per box last week. they had a wall of em. in case y'all cain't wait for some 'fresh' ones.

Posted by reverend dr dj riz on March 12, 2013 at 5:20 PM

You folks need to go to HT Market and goggle at the Bimbo display -- a thousand flourescent baked treats, each more ridiculous than the last, the likes of which Hostess never dreamt of. Don't eat them, though, or you'll get goat cancer.

Posted by Fnarf

on March 12, 2013 at 5:32 PM

When people don't study history in school, this corporate 'culture' seems to be what fills the gaps. I don't find it the least bit folksy. If there were honest dialogue not controlled by agri business, a country with a diabetes and heart disease epidemic wouldn't celebrating 'victories' like a return of Twinkies.

Posted by biffp on March 12, 2013 at 6:04 PM

@6: Lissen, Mister Killjoy, some of us use them as building supplies.

Posted by TVDinner

on March 12, 2013 at 6:21 PM

I hope this deal includes Ding Dongs.

Posted by Gern Blanston on March 12, 2013 at 6:42 PM

Twinkles are a part of my childhood, sweet innocent childhood. Now I care less if they come back or not. It's things like slog and professional sports that deliver a mindfuck to society.

Posted by dnt trust me on March 12, 2013 at 7:06 PM

So are the workers' retirement plans and pensions also back? Thought not.

Posted by Drew2u on March 12, 2013 at 7:22 PM

@8: Bauhaus used to proudly display a pyramid of foil-wrapped Ding Dongs in their display case. Very nice with a cappuccino.

Posted by TLjr on March 12, 2013 at 8:38 PM

Fun fact: Every soldier in the Imperial Japanese Army during WW2 carried a Twinkie with them, to eat in case they were ever captured by the Americans.

Posted by raku on March 12, 2013 at 10:35 PM

@12 That reminds me of the "Man vs. Wild" episode where Bear Grylls took Will Ferrell along with him to Iceland and Grylls entrusted Ferrell with a Twinkie for the trip, which Ferrell promptly ate within the first two hours.

Posted by Gern Blanston on March 12, 2013 at 11:24 PM