by Dan Savage
on Thu, Mar 7, 2013 at 1:30 PM
Last month, I met this woman about four years older than me at a bar. Long story short: we ended up having sex in my car. The problem: the sex went very badly. It was my first time not doing it on a bed, doing it outside, etc., and I must have been nervous because I couldn't sustain an erection. The woman also happens to be "separated" from her husband, and quasi-famous. She's absolutely gorgeous and we seemed to get along great. I would love to see her again, but whenever I suggest getting together (either for dinner or explicitly as a hookup), she avoids the question. Although I made sure she orgasmed through other ways, there's this nagging feeling that it was the bad sex that's keeping her from wanting to see me again. How do I get her to give me another chance?
Limp Until Sex Terminated
My response after the jump...
Text this to her:
Would love to see you again. My performance that night wasn't great, I realize, but I'd never had sex in a car or in a semi-public place before. Obviously not my thing. Never had that problem in a bedroom—it would be great if you gave me a chance to prove it. If things are too stressful for you right now, or if you're not interested, no worries. Hope our paths cross again sometime regardless.
If you hear back from her, the pressure's on. If you don't hear back from her, take the hint.