As you might have read on Slog or in our paper, a few weeks ago local juice company Strawberry Moon Juice challenged a Stranger writer to take their three or five-day juice cleanse and write about it. Their pitch to us simply stated, "... we are trying to find journalist to blog or write about doing a juice cleanse. If you have anyone with the Stranger that would like to take the challenge we would supply the juice, support & knowledge." (BTW, there was little-to-no "support & knowledge." Just juice.)
News writer Anna Minard accepted their challenge and wrote about her experience, which basically hammered home how shitty it feels to deprive your body of food for five days straight. In response, the Strawberry Moon Juice people have gotten a little defensive on their blog, and basically called Minard a food and alcohol addict.
Much has be said about Anna’s approach. Because her fast was not approached with any serious intention the outcome could be predicted... Unfortunately we offered the challenge to someone who’s main outcome was to entertain the public with high jinks.
In other words, drinking juice for five days straight like we asked isn't taking juice seriously enough! You must drink juice until you're so overcome with juice lust that you're stroking yourself with empty juice bottles and begging for more juice!
Then they suggest Minard work on overcoming her crippling dependencies before drinking juice again:
It's a shame that Anna Minard did not enjoy her juice fast. Wrestling food and alcohol dependancies [sic] are hard. Some will kick and scream their way through it, others grin and bear it.
If our sweet and nerdy former books-intern-turned-copy-editor-turned-local-news-writer is the litmus test for food and alcohol addiction, then the rest of us are basically walking sacs of jelly-bean flavored vodka.