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Friday, February 22, 2013

Morning News: Barbie Bandits, Bail for Pistorius, and Holy Gay Vatican Sex

Posted by on Fri, Feb 22, 2013 at 7:06 AM

Dress Warm, Seattle: "One of the strongest storms we have seen so far this winter is moving in early Friday morning," bringing with it heavy rain.

Pistorious Granted Bail: Magistrate Desmond Nair said the state didn't make a convincing case that he would flee or that he had a violent character. The next hearing is set for June 4.

Raise a Glass: Capitol Hill nightclub The Social reopened yesterday after being denied a permanent liquor license from the Liquor Control Board last week. A judge granted a temporary license as club owners are currently in court, appealing the LCB's decision.

Vegas Shooting Erupted After Valet Fight: The manhunt continues for the suspects driving a black Range Rover after it opened fire on a Maserati on the Vegas strip early Thursday morning, killing three and injuring at least six.

Crash Closes Aurora Bridge for Six Hours: The head-on collision happened at 6:30 p.m. yesterday, closing both lanes of traffic as one critically injured victim had to be cut out of his truck.

Pro Tip for Aspiring Robbers: Calling yourself one of the "Barbie Bandits" on your Facebook page, when police are searching for two robbers dubbed the Barbie Bandits, is the quickest path to being arrested.

Bellingham Accountant Pleads Guilty to Being a Creepy Asshole: Specifically, he pleaded guilty to "stalking his ex-girlfriend by gluing her home's doors shut, turning off the gas, cutting her phone and cable lines, and dumping paint remover all over her car. Charles Lysander Storrs IV, 54, harassed the woman for almost a year and a half before police had enough evidence to arrest him."

Vagina-Having Tech Titan Hopes to Start a Revolution: Sheryl Sandberg has written a business self-help book for women based on her successes at Facebook and Google. The only question is, will the average working woman give a fuck?

Even her advisers acknowledge the awkwardness of a woman with double Harvard degrees, dual stock riches (from Facebook and Google, where she also worked), a 9,000-square-foot house and a small army of household help urging less fortunate women to look inward and work harder. Will more earthbound women, struggling with cash flow and child care, embrace the advice of a Silicon Valley executive whose book acknowledgments include thanks to her wealth adviser and Oprah Winfrey?

The Pope Is Lonely: Reuters reports that Pope Benedict is a "serious intellectual" who enjoys living in isolation and is thus uneasy with the day-to-day running of the church. Meanwhile, other news reports speculate his retirement was spurred by a Vatican gay sex and blackmail scandal.


Comments (15) RSS

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Theodore Gorath 1
I know that there are only a few people on this blog who know/care about football, but the first woman ever to participate in an NFL combine (tryouts for the draft, basically) is doing so in New Jersey.

Her name is Lauren Silberman, and she is a kicker going for a Masters degree from MIT. If she does good in her local combine, she will go to a greater regional combine, where she could qualify for the main even in Indianapolis come April. Go Lauren!…
Posted by Theodore Gorath on February 22, 2013 at 7:16 AM · Report this
Pope Peabrain 2
I hope the gay scandal in the Vatican ends with a bunch of tell all books.
Posted by Pope Peabrain on February 22, 2013 at 7:34 AM · Report this
Supreme Ruler Of The Universe 3
For some reason billionaire Sandberg walks it around like she's a $56,000 a year HR manager at parts sub-contractor. "Oh, how will I find daycare..." What is the point of this stupidity?
Posted by Supreme Ruler Of The Universe on February 22, 2013 at 7:41 AM · Report this
care bear 4
Wait, all I have to do is work harder? Shit, why didn't I think of that before.
Posted by care bear on February 22, 2013 at 7:47 AM · Report this
Cracker Jack 5
Driving across the Aurora Bridge in the left-most lane(either way) always freaks me out a little... this did not help.
Posted by Cracker Jack on February 22, 2013 at 7:48 AM · Report this
delirian 6
Anybody who says "pro tip" is either:
a) a golf pro who is trying to give you a tip on your swing, or
b) a person who is trying to communicate in the most explicitly passive-aggressive method they know how.
Posted by delirian on February 22, 2013 at 7:55 AM · Report this
....or making a joke.
Posted by david on February 22, 2013 at 8:15 AM · Report this
The Papal scandal was foreshadowed back in 2010 when Benedict announced that condom use was okay for gay male prostitutes. Apparently they enjoy a strong lobby in the Vatican.
Posted by Clayton on February 22, 2013 at 9:08 AM · Report this
Original Andrew 9
Re: Sandberg

Wow, AmeriKKKa's Marie Antoinette-prima donnas have really lost it.
Posted by Original Andrew on February 22, 2013 at 9:55 AM · Report this
Reminds me of the manager I had once, who read management self-help books obsessively and decided we had to meet every morning to set daily, weekly, and monthly "work goals." Problem was, I was just the receptionist and ALL of my duties were 100% the SAME EVERY DAY. This was the same company where the two management people took EACH OTHER out to lunch for Employee Appreciation Day, while all the actual "employees" got nada.
Posted by Pope Buck I on February 22, 2013 at 10:37 AM · Report this
And for the really nasty news of the day, brought to us merry people of the forest by our intrepid GAO:…

And the GAO report:

Posted by sgt_doom on February 22, 2013 at 10:39 AM · Report this

My fault, sorry!

Posted by sgt_doom on February 22, 2013 at 10:40 AM · Report this
While I cannot offer a pro tip, I sure can offer just the tip...
Posted by _db_ on February 22, 2013 at 11:48 AM · Report this
keshmeshi 14

I work for a company where we do lots of that kind of shit. Fortunately not every morning. I find it aggravating as my job is underpaid and has no room for advancement unless I move cross country. Having to go through the motions, pretending that I give a shit about my job and that my company gives a shit about me, is not pleasant.
Posted by keshmeshi on February 22, 2013 at 12:07 PM · Report this
Okay, so *that's* why the 358 was on Stone Way yesterday.
Posted by got it on February 22, 2013 at 1:50 PM · Report this

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