by Dan Savage
on Thu, Jan 17, 2013 at 10:47 AM
I just read your article about evangelical girls "saddlebacking" in order to preserve their virginities. I am a 21-year-old and have been sexually active since age 14. I engage in oral and anal sex. I have never had vaginal intercourse so techically I am still a virgin. My reason for doing this has nothing to do with religion and everything to do with AVOIDING PREGNANCY. And, yes, I think it would be nice to give the man I marry a rare gift on our wedding night. And with my experiences over the past seven years I believe I will be able to keep my future husband fulfilled and quite happy in the bedroom.—No Name
Anal is a highly effective birth control method and there's only one known case of a someone getting pregnant through oral sex. But anal intercourse is also the most effective means of HIV transmission—eighteen times more effective a mode of transmission than vaginal intercourse—so I hope you're using condoms regardless.
One quibble: If technically you're still a virgin, NN, then technically my husband is still a virgin too.
My husband isn't a virgin, technically or otherwise, and neither are you, NN. Your vagina might be a virgin, sure, but you're not a virgin.