Charging Drivers By the Mile: The state may study transitioning away from flat gas taxes to a "pay as you go" road-fee system.

HORSE for Kings, Motherfuckers: The city of Sacramento vows to scrimmage Seattle for the rights to retain their beloved basketball team.

Ohio Newspaper Sues Judge Over Rape Case: The Cincinnati Enquirer is suing to unseal files associated with an Ohio college student who posted fliers around his college campus counseling students on how to get away with rape. The student initially pled guilty, but was then allowed to withdraw his plea and have the charge against him dropped. The Enquirer is arguing that the judge improperly sealed the files.

Lincoln Leads with 12 Nominations: The Academy Awards are coming.

Portrait of the Aurora Shooter: Prosecutors contend that before opening fire at the Colorado movie theater, suspect James Holmes took cell phone photos of himself sticking out his tongue with a cache of weapons, as well as reconnaissance photos of the theater itself. The defense is widely expected to argue Holmes is not guilty by reason of insanity.

Three Kurdish Women Shot Dead: The killings were described as "precise assassination style executions." The victims included one of the co-founders of the Kurdish Worker's Party (PKK), which wants political and cultural separation from Turkey for all Kurds. Their bodies were discovered Thursday morning inside the Kurdish Information Centre in Paris.

Save the Orcas: "Ice encroaching on a pod of killer whales trapped in Hudson Bay." Where the fuck is global warming when you need it? UPDATE: The whales are apparently free now. Hurrah for happy endings!

Consider the Mingus: Go on. Consider it.

Chavez Rules from the ICU: The Venezuelan Supreme Court ruled that President Hugo Chavez can postpone his inauguration while allowing his government to continue in office, to the chagrin of opposition leaders. However, amidst medical complications from cancer, questions remain about when he'll be fit to return to power.

Indian Rape Suspects Claim Torture, Coercion: A lawyer for one of the Delhi rape suspects claims that the five men on trial for raping and murdering a woman last month were tortured into confessing.

Pull That Trigger: America's Favorite Uncle™, Joe Biden, says that President Obama is considering issuing an executive order to restrict access to assault weapons and certain types of ammunition.

For Fuck's Sake: Woman objects to her son taking a yoga class in elementary school because thanking the sun for its warmth is too Hindu for her tastes, so now she's part of a group lobbying to kill yoga in schools.