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Tuesday, January 8, 2013

Crime When Hippies Attack

Posted by Dominic Holden on Tue, Jan 8, 2013 at 7:50 AM

A man in Portland, Oregon, is accused of choking his girlfriend using... his dreadlocks:

According to Portland police, officers responded to a domestic violence report at a residence in the 3200 block of Southeast 22nd Avenue at about 2:30 a.m. A woman told officers that her boyfriend, Grotberg, had assaulted her, and then choked her with his dreadlocks. Officers searched the neighborhood and located Grotberg, taking him into custody.

The news comes via Gawker, which points to the Associated Press's definition of the alleged assault weapon:

Dreadlocks are matted ropes of hair.

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Comments (16) RSS

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[insert "Portlandia" joke here]

Posted by Fnarf

on January 8, 2013 at 8:05 AM

[ insert snarky pun about feelings of dread here ]

Posted by GlibReaper on January 8, 2013 at 8:24 AM

[insert "if only everyone had X, this never would have happened" joke here]

Posted by MacCrocodile

on January 8, 2013 at 8:37 AM

No woman.
No cry.

Posted by Supreme Ruler Of The Universe

on January 8, 2013 at 8:44 AM

Insert comments 1,2 and 4 are funny

Posted by dnt trust me on January 8, 2013 at 9:16 AM

@1 Janet Weiss tweeted this story to Carrie Brownstein last night, so you are correct.

Posted by sisyphusgal on January 8, 2013 at 9:59 AM

The Shitwig Strangler. Not mellow, dude.

Posted by carnivorous chicken on January 8, 2013 at 10:09 AM

harsh tokes

Posted by 34x42 on January 8, 2013 at 10:22 AM

Seems like a bit of an ironic overreaction to, "your fucking hair smells, and you should cut it."

Posted by biffp on January 8, 2013 at 10:28 AM

And when the FBI assassinates ....

http://www.privacysos.org/node/918

http://www.justiceonline.org/our-work/ow…

http://www.privacysos.org/node/918%23plo…

Posted by sgt_doom on January 8, 2013 at 10:39 AM

Hahaha. No bro-digs here, huh, Dominic?

Posted by rob!

on January 8, 2013 at 10:43 AM

You're rewriting history if you think dreadlocks were around during the 1960s. It's more of a hippie wannabe thing.

Posted by RebR on January 8, 2013 at 11:54 AM

Grotberg?

Posted by Just call me Grotty on January 8, 2013 at 12:52 PM

Cultural appropriation kills!

Posted by sirkowski

on January 8, 2013 at 2:27 PM

How dreadful.

Posted by knobtheunicorn on January 8, 2013 at 2:35 PM

We don't know that he was a hippie.

That said, having lived in a hippie town, I've always seen seen the pot smoking hippie lifestyle as something some men choose to suppress their anger.

If you're naturally so peaceful, why do you need to show it so much?

Posted by doloresdaphne on January 8, 2013 at 3:21 PM