If I were him, I'd start out with just some moderate walking. New Jersey Governor Chris Christie, riding his post-Sandy high, says that "you’re damn right I’d be more ready" to run for president in 2016.
Ten billion dollars! Bank of America has agreed to pay $10 billion to Fannie Mae to settle claims that its subsidiary Countrywide misrepresented the quality of mortgages it sold to the government-owned mortgage giant.
If it's not Boeing, I'm not going (to catch fire). An empty 787 Dreamliner caught fire while parked at a gate at Boston's Logan International Airport. The 787 has been plagued with electrical problems.
If everybody carried a bobcat, tragedies like this would never happen. A Massachusetts man is being treated for rabies after being attacked by bobcat in his garage.
If everybody carried a gun... oh, wait. Nobody was injured at a Cost Plus in Silverdale after a well-regulated militia dropped a .38 caliber handgun on the floor, causing it to discharge a bullet into a stack of nesting rope baskets.
OMG, it might snow Wednesday night! Then again, it might not.