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Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Congrats, Guys! Suck It, Haters!

Posted by on Tue, Dec 18, 2012 at 8:35 AM

This story is giving the rightwing haters a big sad:

U.S. Marine Corps Capt. Matthew Phelps made history Saturday at the home of his commander in chief. The 35-year-old active-duty officer proposed to his boyfriend, Ben Schock, 26, in the Grand Foyer of the White House at the end of a holiday tour. It’s believed to be the first time two gay men have gotten engaged inside the White House, and a first for an active-duty member of the U.S. military. A transgender man proposed to his partner in the East Room earlier this year. “Our first date was to the White House, so I wanted to propose to him there,” Phelps told ABC News. “When I got invited to the holiday tour—six months to the day that we had been there on our first date—it was way too much of a coincidence to pass up.”

First, congrats! Here's to many happy years together! Second, proposing after six months? Here's to a nice, long engagement!

 

Comments (21) RSS

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21
My hubby and I got engaged 6 weeks after we met, pregnant 6 weeks after that and married 9 months after our first date. It's been almost 10 years (and we were 18 when we met, 19 when we married) and we are still just as in love as the day he proposed.

Congrats guys and I am thrilled that you will be able to marry and live openly with one of you serving our country! Thank you for your service.
Posted by butterflyrose83 on December 26, 2012 at 8:37 PM · Report this
20
My husband and I got engaged about ten weeks after we met, and married about five months after we met. And we are still married after 21 years and are happy and love each other. There were some rocky times along the way, but we worked through them.
Posted by Violet415 on December 19, 2012 at 9:50 AM · Report this
19
I still hold that I could only approve of a public proposal if the recipient, despite genuinely wanting to marry the proposer, were to channel Shelley Long and decline.
Posted by vennominon on December 18, 2012 at 8:58 PM · Report this
18
@14 the only strong correlation that I know of is a strong negative correlation between "cohabitation before marriage" and "staying married". It doesn't mean anything in any particular case, of course. You really can't accurately predict based on duration of dating or extent of cohabitation how long a marriage will last. Gottman can predict the end of a marriage, but he does it based on observation of interaction, which makes more sense.
Posted by Thisbe on December 18, 2012 at 7:01 PM · Report this
ScrawnyKayaker 17
@12 At least the "kids that weren't properly planned for" part is less likely to be a problem in this case. To paraphrase Dan's book, it's pretty hard to get drunk and accidentally do an adoption.
Posted by ScrawnyKayaker on December 18, 2012 at 1:34 PM · Report this
debug 16
Gays should have the same rights to quickie marriages and quickie divorces as irresponsible heteros have.
Posted by debug on December 18, 2012 at 1:10 PM · Report this
Bauhaus I 15
Dan, I know you vetted guys thoroughly before even discussing commitment - and that's admirable. I wish everyone would do that, but I've heard of people knowing each other for six months and the ensuing relationship working out very well. Sometimes you just know. Six weeks? No. Six months? Depends, but possible.
Posted by Bauhaus I on December 18, 2012 at 12:28 PM · Report this
long-time reader 14
@7, didn't all the people who wind up getting divorced also think they found "the one"?

In high school I knew I had found the one. We still waited until we were in our 20's to actually get hitched. I have a hunch that the time span between meeting and getting married positively correlates with the duration of a marriage.
Posted by long-time reader on December 18, 2012 at 11:32 AM · Report this
Womyn2me 13
6 months. well, hope springs eternal. I would have the same level of pessimism for a het couple.
On the other hand, I shant be surprised by wedding invites from lesbians where the couple doesn't know each others middle name as of yet.
"What does a lesbian take on a second date?" 1) a Uhaul or 2) what second date
Posted by Womyn2me http://http:\\www.shelleyandlaura.com on December 18, 2012 at 11:30 AM · Report this
Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn 12
@6

Straight troops get married a week after they meet. This is a normal part of military culture, and now gays are participating in it too. Ill-considered marriage, kids that weren't properly planned for, dependence on social services, domestic violence, divorce. All exacerbated by the separation of long deployments.

A few years ago the commandant of the Marine Corps tried to turn it around, offering cash bonuses to Marines who stayed unmarried, but Bill Clinton put the kibosh on it.
Posted by Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn http://youtu.be/zu-akdyxpUc on December 18, 2012 at 10:42 AM · Report this
11
Dan's point about six months is valid, but let me remind all of us that life is different for active duty soldiers, and some life decisions are a little more immediate. There's a reason a lot of our grandparents got hitched in the first months of WWII.
Posted by aseth on December 18, 2012 at 10:37 AM · Report this
Simone 10
Congratulations guys. 6 months is a bit short but well, that's their decision.
Posted by Simone on December 18, 2012 at 10:32 AM · Report this
AmyC 9
@6 - I hear ya. But I second what originalcinner said @7 - I got married right quick at a real young age (21, knew each other about 9 months), and all's turned out well. We were lucky in that we turned out to actually be a good match for each other once the new romance stars wore off.
Posted by AmyC on December 18, 2012 at 10:23 AM · Report this
mayor 8
" It’s believed to be the first time two gay men have gotten engaged inside the White House," publicly.
Posted by mayor on December 18, 2012 at 10:02 AM · Report this
7
We got straight married after a mere handful of dates (intercontinental internet romance). We're coming up to nine years at the end of this month. When you find the right one, you know. Congrats to Matthew and Ben, and best wishes for the happiest of futures together.
Posted by originalcinner on December 18, 2012 at 9:59 AM · Report this
brandon 6
Ugh. Maybe if the 26 YO had proposed it might be easier to have hope, but 6 months? Yeesh. Fingers crossed boys, fingers crossed.

Maybe I'm just jaded.
Posted by brandon on December 18, 2012 at 9:45 AM · Report this
5
Also Amazing But True factoid;

Phelps took a leak and wanked one off while in the White House public john; another first......
Posted by we live in an amazing time... on December 18, 2012 at 9:37 AM · Report this
4
Plus, Ben Schock is a local - grew up in Ellensburg, went to UW, and his brother owns the Bottlehouse in Madrona. Ben Schock is also quite splendid. All his friends are very happy for him but totally unshocked by his sudden gay celebrity status.
Posted by Peace Frog on December 18, 2012 at 9:36 AM · Report this
3
Ben Schock (the 26y.o. fiance) is from Ellensburg and graduated from UW!
Posted by kuiouyiopiu on December 18, 2012 at 9:23 AM · Report this
2
At ages 35 and 26, at least they are old enough to have a reasonable understanding of their own needs. I would be much more concerned if they were 20 or 21 years old. In any case, this is very sweet. Congrats to them both.
Posted by SeattleKim on December 18, 2012 at 9:20 AM · Report this
Pope Peabrain 1
Wouldn't it be great if they could marry in the White House, too!
Posted by Pope Peabrain on December 18, 2012 at 9:07 AM · Report this

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