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Wednesday, November 14, 2012

A Critical Overview of The Stranger

Posted by on Wed, Nov 14, 2012 at 9:00 AM

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We're observing Slog silence from now until 11 a.m. while we have an editorial meeting, but look—we made an entire paper's worth of stuff for you! Here's what Karl Rove has to say.

There is no shame in admitting you have made a mistake. When the facts play against your favor, you have to acknowledge them, bring them to light. So that's why I'm writing this editorial to you, the American people, to urge you to come clean. Don't you think that it's time to admit that you were all a bit hasty when you called the 2012 presidential election in President Obama's favor last Tuesday?

It's time to reevaluate those pesky facts that you chose to ignore. Governor Mitt Romney held a small but persistent polling edge, leading in 19 of the 31 national surveys released just before the election. Governor Romney was performing at or above 50 percent in 10 polls, Obama in none.

Furthermore, in battleground states, the edge in early and absentee vote turnout that propelled Democrats to victory in 2008 was clearly going to be eroded, cut in half according to a Republican National Committee summary. Didn't we all agree that it was going to come down to the all-important Buckeye State? There, too, the early voting news wasn't encouraging for the president. When you looked at all the data, Governor Romney was beating President Obama, who won independents by eight points last time around. So if Governor Romney was leading among independents, even by one point—and he was leading by an average of seven—that presaged enough votes being shifted to shift the election. It seems obvious, in retrospect, to see that Mitt Romney is the new president of the United States.

Nobody enjoys admitting guilt. And nobody likes a scold, either. I'm not comfortable in my role as the messenger, the delivery boy for logic and reason. My employers at Fox News took the easy way out, and banned me from saying the words "Ohio," "polls," or "data" on their airwaves ever again. That's why I appreciate smaller, more free-thinking venues like The Stranger that allow me to get my message across to the American people.

Looking around The Stranger, however, I see several issues demanding my attention, as a poll-reading veteran. For example, trust me: DOMINIC HOLDEN's liberal-biased essay about marijuana reform is jumping the gun. Based on internal polling, I predict that marijuana was narrowly defeated last Tuesday, riding on the conservative wave that narrowly elected Governor Romney into office. Besides, Governor-elect Rob McKenna surely would not allow such a flagrant refutation of family values to become the law of the land in Washington State, he's too decent a man for that. So this is a waste of space.

And this bit by JEN GRAVES about a drawing of bare breasts on display at Cornish is just vulgar. Aren't there obscenity laws in Washington State? This is the state that, according to my data, bravely voted down gay marriage by the slenderest of margins just over a week ago today. After all, when you're looking at election results like the ones I believe we saw last Tuesday, you have to believe that the electorate is sending you some kind of a message.

 

Comments (8) RSS

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Supreme Ruler Of The Universe 1
I would rather hear a real story about the Democrat "ground game" in urban centers, and the efforts that got him a +D10 turnout.

Oh, but that would take like...reporting...instead of cutting and pasting hyperlinks.
Posted by Supreme Ruler Of The Universe http://www.you-read-it-here-first.com on November 14, 2012 at 9:30 AM
Pope Peabrain 2
Point is, Republicans show contempt for facts. Just name a subject. Evolution, global warming, healthcare spending, etc., etc. And it lead to their own downfall. There is something so sweet about that.
Posted by Pope Peabrain on November 14, 2012 at 9:54 AM
3
Carl, you lost, get over it.
Posted by woode on November 14, 2012 at 10:27 AM
Will in Seattle 4
So, when does your War Crimes Trial start, Karl?
Posted by Will in Seattle http://www.facebook.com/WillSeattle on November 14, 2012 at 10:43 AM
Supreme Ruler Of The Universe 5

Velikovski tittering in grave!

Rogue planet found floating without star

http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-205_162-5754…

Posted by Supreme Ruler Of The Universe http://www.you-read-it-here-first.com on November 14, 2012 at 10:57 AM
ArtBasketSara 6
Karl Rove!
Posted by ArtBasketSara on November 14, 2012 at 11:39 AM
7
Karl Rove isn't fit to massage A. Birch Steen's piles.
Posted by Joe Glibmoron on November 14, 2012 at 12:59 PM
long-time reader 8
You guys, Karl Rove isn't going to read these comments. If you actually want him to read your words, send them to karl@rove.com.
Posted by long-time reader on November 14, 2012 at 4:58 PM

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