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Wednesday, November 7, 2012

Election What Would Republicans Do to Not Vote for Chris Christie?

Posted by Paul Constant on Wed, Nov 7, 2012 at 2:07 PM

Okay, okay: I'm just going to put up one more schadenfreude post and then I promise it's back to work. Over at The Corner, John J. Miller writes, "So, it’s pretty clear that Chris Christie won’t be the GOP nominee in 2016, right?"

What follows in the comments is an amazing display of conservative self-torture one-upmanship. Seriously, it's like a masturbatory, conservative 50 Shades of Grey:

I'd rather vote Ron Paul, and I think Ron Paul is a loon. I'd rather walk through fire. I'd rather not eat for two weeks. I'd rather go skydiving without a parachute.

Yes. Yes I would vote for Ron Paul before Christie too. In fact, I would walk through that fire with you to vote for Paul before I supported Christie.

I would carry the two of you on my back through burning broken glass for this exercise.

To add to the totally justified hyperbole: I would rather nail my hand to a burning building than vote for Christie.

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Bipartisanship in the face of a national disaster. Good thing the Republicans in congress would never sink so low.

Posted by Spike1382 on November 7, 2012 at 2:17 PM

Chris Christie is an opportunistic pig. In other words, a successful politician.

But he's about as telegenic as a side of beef hanging in a cold storage locker.

Maybe Obama should appoint him as Ambassador to Tonga, where spherical dudes rule.

Posted by Karlheinz Arschbomber

on November 7, 2012 at 2:18 PM

I think his response gives him great credibility. These right-wing nuts will have calmed down by the next election, and independants and even liberals will give him respect. Christie can have a long career ahead of him.

Posted by Matt the Engineer on November 7, 2012 at 2:22 PM

To be fair though, Ron Paul fans would say that about every politician, not just Christie.

Posted by Urgutha Forka on November 7, 2012 at 2:32 PM

I don't watch reality TV, but that sounds like the premise for a pretty entertaining show.

Posted by PCM on November 7, 2012 at 2:38 PM

This makes me miss my grandfather...nothing quite as nostalgic as old men bitching about "pussies" from the safety of their lazy boy recliners. Take away the TV guide and the cheap beer, and they will turn on their own.

Posted by pussnboots on November 7, 2012 at 2:53 PM

@3: He could, if he weren't morbidly obese. I don't think he'd do well in the rigors of a national presidential campaign.

Posted by Aaron on November 7, 2012 at 3:34 PM

Team Rape begins to eat itself. Better than eating other Americans.

Posted by Some Old Nobodaddy Logged In on November 7, 2012 at 3:45 PM

I would walk through that fire with you. I would hold your hand, firm and reassuring, and walk through those swirling flames. I would caress your palm, meeting your eyes with longing as we stepped into the fire's warm embrace, shivering with unrequited and sinful desire.

Posted by Volo on November 7, 2012 at 4:11 PM

Do it. No balls.

Posted by prompt on November 7, 2012 at 4:53 PM

I would stand in line for seven hours to nail their hands to that burning building.

Posted by Dr_Awesome on November 7, 2012 at 5:20 PM

Wasn't this exactly the refrain about Romney in the '08 primaries?

Posted by emma's bee on November 7, 2012 at 6:11 PM

Christie has more than enough time to turn himself around. But if the Republican primaries were a circular firing squad this time, it doesn't bear imagining what the 2016 ones will look like.

They're seriously trying to float yet another Bush while trying to pretend they aren't into dynasties. Santorum will likely wash up again. And that's just the start of the crazy.

Posted by Lymis on November 8, 2012 at 6:13 AM

I will never vote for Christie. If the coming election were between a democrat and Christie...I would not vote! Christie's comments after Sandy showed that he is not a "big picture man" and is only capable of
"caring" about one issue at a time. A president needs to be able to care about one issue without "not caring" about all the others.

Posted by Mopsy-Topsy on May 8, 2013 at 8:18 AM