Hurricane Drives Politicians From Virginia: Both Obama and Romney have canceled campaign events there.

Tacoma Firefighters Rescued an Owl in Fishing Line: Awww.

Not Going to That Block Party: Hermit crabs apparently socialize to find neighbor crabs' shells and take them.

Millions in Irish Aid Goes Missing: In Uganda, $5 million in Irish aid dollars has gone missing in what is widely believed to be scam involving all levels of government.

The 1% Has to Follow Laws Too? Which I guess is news to the Mastros who fled to France after allegedly refusing to fork over the wife's 27.8 and 15.9-carat diamonds in bankruptcy proceedings. They've been caught now.

10 Quotes From Hillary Clinton: In honor of her birthday yesterday, "If I want to knock a story off the front page, I just change my hairstyle."

Man is Charged With Killing His Father in Pierce County: "According to the Pierce County Prosecutor’s office, Jonathan Meline woke up around 2 a.m. on Thursday, drank some coffee, walked into his father’s bedroom and bludgeoned him to death with a hatchet."

Naked Lady Beats Up Older Woman in Olympia: No one's really sure why.

Ellen Hires That One Girl: You know, the one who made this awkward video? Apparently it worked.

Say What? You're still confused about your ballot? We have our endorsements here.