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Thursday, September 20, 2012

The Thursday Morning News

Posted by on Thu, Sep 20, 2012 at 6:25 AM

Mittmentum! Republican nominee Mitt Romney finally passed a 24-hour period without (being caught) saying anything profoundly stupid. Too late for his party though, whose prospects of taking the Senate appear to be tanking with Romney.

Because running as a shill for capital worked so well for Mitt. Former Republican presidential hopeful Tim Pawlenty has launched his 2016 campaign by becoming a banking industry lobbyist.

Because they could. Senate Republicans have blocked a $1 billion veteran jobs bill sponsored by WA's Sen. Patty Murray, mostly just to deny President Obama a pre-election legislative victory.

Hide your sandwiches! Zaftig New Jersey Governor Chris Christie is heading back out to Washington again to stump for Rob McKenna.

You'd think they'd have more pressing things to be angry about. Hundreds of YouTube incensed Pakistani protesters clashed with riot police in the latest demonstration of the Muslim street's utter humorlessness.

I've seen the pictures, and her breasts aren't all that great. Hundreds of angry Britons will not clash with riot police over news that a Danish magazine has published topless photos of Princess Kate.

A great opportunity to drill for more oil! Arctic ice shrank to a new low this summer, 18 percent below the previous record. Nothing to see here.

A desperate howl for help. A 7-year-old beagle survived a 70-foot jump from a New Jersey bridge, suffering only minor bruises.

My, what a love tan your penis has. A man arrested for allegedly masturbating in Seattle's Cowen Park, told police he was just sunbathing. His penis.

I must remember this trick the next time I murder my wife and need to dispose of her body. I've often quipped that any meat slow cooked with onions would be tender and delicious. Apparently, it's true.

 

Comments (33) RSS

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Theodore Gorath 1
Glad to see the British will not be attacking any Danish embassies with rocket propelled grenades. I was worried there for a minute.

Also, I wish I had two sets of hands, so I could give those titties four thumbs down.
Posted by Theodore Gorath on September 20, 2012 at 6:42 AM · Report this
2
I've noticed over the last couple of days a few blog posts have linked to the mobile versions of websites. Can you post the links to the real sites? I think that if someone were viewing the blog on a mobile device it would detect that and change. it doesn't change the other way - or that's what my experience is teaching me.

Or are laptops/desktops now a dead media? (fax me the answer to that one)
Posted by Foonken2 on September 20, 2012 at 6:47 AM · Report this
Pope Peabrain 3
The Republicans have blocked a jobs bill for veterans to damage Obama? Well, they can't do any more damage to the worst congress in history, can they? Are they possibly that fucking mean and stupid? Yes!
Posted by Pope Peabrain on September 20, 2012 at 7:10 AM · Report this
dnt trust me 4
Poor beagle, or lucky beagle. During many a depressed moment over the years, I've tried to calculate how high I would have to jump to ensure a guaranteed suicide.
Posted by dnt trust me on September 20, 2012 at 7:11 AM · Report this
Rotten666 5
"I've seen the pictures, and her breasts aren't all that great", and " I wish I had two sets of hands, so I could give those titties four thumbs down".

That's some petty, cold shit right there. Don't you have a daughter Goldy?
Posted by Rotten666 on September 20, 2012 at 7:30 AM · Report this
Big Matt G 6
I'd like to chime in here and say that I personally find Her Royal Boobies to be quite toothsome!
Posted by Big Matt G on September 20, 2012 at 7:51 AM · Report this
7
5

no.

its an awkward subject....
Posted by goldy raised another man's daughter. on September 20, 2012 at 7:53 AM · Report this
8
+1 for the royal boobs being a let-down.
Posted by seattlebikeguy on September 20, 2012 at 8:05 AM · Report this
9
@5 Since when has Goldy posted a comment not as himself?
Posted by searunner on September 20, 2012 at 8:05 AM · Report this
10
Goldy why didn't you post that Obama's CounterTerrorism Director said the murder of Chris Stevens was a terrorist attack?

Not the result of a protest riot.....

That Stevens was on a terrorist hit list?

And knew it?

And spent the last weeks of his life fearing for his life?

And that Obama did not protect him?

Why didn't you post that, ShitHead?
Posted by OBAMA LIED...... on September 20, 2012 at 8:06 AM · Report this
11
How dare the woman not have perfect, porn star breasts! Doesn't she know they are only there for the pleasure of strangers on the other side of the world?!
Posted by digitalwitch on September 20, 2012 at 8:37 AM · Report this
Matt from Denver 12
Regarding the royal breasts... there's a difference between how they look in candid photos taken from hundreds of meters away and how they would look if she were posing for glamor shots. It's the same with virtually every other topless celebrity picture the tabloids get. Just being naked isn't sexy all by itself.
Posted by Matt from Denver on September 20, 2012 at 8:39 AM · Report this
13
@3
The Democrats need to use that now.

Run ads with vets asking Senate Republicans BY NAME why he (or she) stopped the bill that would help vets.

Particularly if they could match a pro-war vote then to an anti-vet stance today.
Posted by fairly.unbalanced on September 20, 2012 at 8:39 AM · Report this
josh 14
The veterans bill is one where I just don't understand why Democrats don't force a real live old time filibuster.
Posted by josh http://www.sciencevsromance.net on September 20, 2012 at 8:58 AM · Report this
Urgutha Forka 15
@14,
Because the senate democrats are spineless, gutless, cowards.
Posted by Urgutha Forka on September 20, 2012 at 9:03 AM · Report this
16
Is co-chair T-Paw the first major rat to abandon Romney's sinking turdship of a campaign? Will there be a flood of departures over the next few weeks?

"Screw this noise, I'm gonna go cash in over at LobbyLand."
Posted by rainbird on September 20, 2012 at 9:05 AM · Report this
TVDinner 17
Herp derp "A fat guy is coming!" Herp derp "Make a lowest-common denominator joke about him eating all the food!" Herp derp
Posted by TVDinner http:// on September 20, 2012 at 9:10 AM · Report this
Theodore Gorath 18
@5: It's a joke, a quote from Chapelle's show.

I'm Rick James Bitch.

Posted by Theodore Gorath on September 20, 2012 at 9:24 AM · Report this
19
Seriously, Goldy, surely you can find some way to be humorous without belitting people's physical appearance. It's quite juvenile. And it makes you a lazy writer.
Posted by Real breasts are beautiful on September 20, 2012 at 9:28 AM · Report this
20
Leave Goldy alone.

Faggots don't understand breasts.....
Posted by Goldy's Momma on September 20, 2012 at 9:36 AM · Report this
21
@18: and yet, somehow still not funny.
Posted by digitalwitch on September 20, 2012 at 9:36 AM · Report this
Mittens Schrodinger 22
"the Muslim street's utter humorlessness"? This is all happening on one street somewhere in Pakistan?
Posted by Mittens Schrodinger on September 20, 2012 at 9:48 AM · Report this
23
@21: That's a given, since it came from Chapelle's mouth and all...
Posted by suddenlyorcas on September 20, 2012 at 9:50 AM · Report this
Theodore Gorath 24
@21: Congratulations on feeling that way. I thought it was funny on the show. Let's celebrate our differences.
Posted by Theodore Gorath on September 20, 2012 at 9:53 AM · Report this
Matt the Engineer 25
Anyone that hasn't clicked on the cooking wife link, do it now. That's a seriously messed up story.
Posted by Matt the Engineer on September 20, 2012 at 10:03 AM · Report this
26
@5 - Don't forget he will "remember" that cooking trick next time he murders his wife... O_o
Posted by subwlf on September 20, 2012 at 10:07 AM · Report this
27
Why Jesse Ventura is right: unmeming the meme


The constant litany of “Supreme Court choices” as a motivating factor in reelecting the neocon administration of President Obama doesn’t really hold up when all the data is examined.

Those closely following federal court jurisprudence will understand what we say when it is explained that the majority of truly important cases never make it to the supreme court, while too many trivial cases do end up there.

The Citizens United case should never have made it to the SCOTUS level, where the vile decision was written by the so-called “liberal” Justice David Kennedy (so described by newsy pundits).

The really important judicial decisions, antithetical to democracy, to the citizenry, to working people and those seeking work, are rendered by the federal courts.

This structure isn’t by chance, but careful design, put in place back in 1978, and incrementally improved over the past thirty-some years.

The US Chamber of Commerce established the National Chamber Litigation Center to this very end, back in 1978.

Thus, when the populist Jesse Ventura urges American voters to reject their usual choice of militant ignorance, and seek the third party solution, he is quite correct.

Today, the government has the “legal” right to access all personal information about the citizenry without their knowledge, thanks to the Obama Administration and judicial decisions from the federal courts; this is no justification to reelect.

Obviously, the strategy was to find the vilest, most despicable American possible to run against Obama, making him appear pristine by comparison. In this they’ve been most successful with their choice of the vile, despicable Romney (and Ryan).

Whether from indoctrination or mass advertising, too often Americans choose to remain ignorant --- and it is a choice!

Recently, like many others, I was approached to make a donation against the validation of Wisconsin’s Gov. Walker in his recall election. Naturally, I declined --- not having the money was beside the point --- having watched the exit interviews of union members from the Walker’s first election to governor, I was convinced of their militant choice to remain ignorant.

I was sadly proven correct: 40% of union households in Wisconsin voted for Walker in both elections!

Presently, we see the workers at Bain’s Sensata facility, whose jobs are being offshored to China, having finally recognized the impact of jobs offshoring (now that it has affected them), and blithely explaining how they were taken by surprise?

Amazing, given the overwhelming data to suggest that was the likely outcome!

I have personally witnessed this type of behavior again and again and again; where the workers refuse to acknowledge the obvious --- where they chose ignorance above all!

Now the Bain-owned company workers are begging Bain not to offshore their jobs; the psychopaths just love to see them beg.

Of course, those pathetically begging workers don’t realize this as they’ve chosen to remain ignorant all along.

Those of us who’ve been actively fighting jobs offshoring --- one of their major tools in the dismantling of the economy --- since 1978, the same year of the Powell memorandum, the year the USCoC established their National Chamber Litigation Center, and the Rockefeller Foundations’ creation of the Group of Thirty --- view the begging workers with disgust and disdain.

(At this late date, thirty years too little, too late, they would probably be better served going back to watching their sports, cable TV and movies, etc.)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=pla…

Special notes: Awhile back, Goldy wrote an excellent blog piece on monies flowing from the most democratic parts of the state, to the most neocon areas. This is the uniform and standard pattern in all 50 states, and at the federal level, monies flowing from the most blue states to the most red states (Alaska, Mississippi, Alabama, etc.). This is no accident but stems from the efforts of USCoC's National Chamber Litigation Center of the past three decades.

Also, the Group of Thirty, was established to support the central bankers and the speculators, essentially the same thing, or so heavily interlocked they may as well be. Larry Summers and Paul Krugman have long been members, and even though Krugman repeatedly tells simpletons and fools he's a "liberal," Krugman consistently has always come down on the side of the speculators and central bankers although, occasionally, he words his position to suggest he's for "the people." Krugman claimed there was no housing bubble when it was obvious to all, claimed there wasn't any speculation taking place in the oil/energy markets (and refinery-involved chemicals, and transportation [freight forward futures, etc.]) when the paper price of oil was 13.8 times the physical price --- and Goldman Sachs, Morgan Stanley, JPMorgan Chase and Citigroup were making a fortune by said speculation through their hedge funds. Krugman has claimed the banks were healthy, instead of the obvious zombie banks, etc., etc., etc.

If the devil tells the simpleton he's a "liberal" -- too often the simpleton will believe it.
More...
Posted by sgt_doom on September 20, 2012 at 10:39 AM · Report this
Irena 28
@1 "Also, I wish I had two sets of hands, so I could give those titties four thumbs down"

Ah, Theodore. Feminism is so lucky to have you on our side.

And what TVDinner @17 said. Seriously, Goldy. Fat jokes?
Posted by Irena on September 20, 2012 at 10:51 AM · Report this
More, I Say! 29
Leave Kate Middleton and her titties alone, you fucking dickheads. Jesus christ. Goldy, for shame. Asshole commenters, I'm only sad that I'm not surprised by y'all continuing to be assholes.

Way to put it, Rotten666.
Posted by More, I Say! on September 20, 2012 at 11:09 AM · Report this
30
Can put these Chris Christie fat jokes to rest? There's enough fat shaming in world as it is.
Posted by mhulot on September 20, 2012 at 11:14 AM · Report this
Theodore Gorath 31
@28: Hey, one of us has to be able to take a joke, right?

Ba-Dum Tish

<3
Posted by Theodore Gorath on September 20, 2012 at 11:51 AM · Report this
McGee 32
@21 That joke is actually tremendously funny in the context of the sketch.
Posted by McGee on September 20, 2012 at 3:02 PM · Report this
Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn 33
Fat shaming and tit jokes are where The Stranger shows its true colors.
Posted by Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn http://youtu.be/zu-akdyxpUc on September 20, 2012 at 5:17 PM · Report this

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