Slog

News & Arts

Line Out

Music & the City
at Night

« Vote for Rob McKenna's Next Campaig… | Bill Clinton Stars in New Pro-Obama… »

Thursday, August 23, 2012

Death Mitt Romney Died About 2005

Posted by Dominic Holden on Thu, Aug 23, 2012 at 11:37 AM

According to blogger Tim Killian's research, the Republican candidate for president passed about seven years ago, but, still, no death certificate exists:

I went to the Mormon church owned familysearch.org. There’s no records of Willard Mitt Romney there at all! It’s all been scrubbed! So, while I’m not naive enough to present the conspiracy that Mr. Romney NEVER existed, I do wonder WHAT the LDS Church is hiding! Mr. Romney, just produce your death certificate!

The death certificate surely exists somewhere, right, so why not just show it? Unless—let's just think here—Romney died in Mexico. Or those funeral receipts were obvious fakes! Or his name wasn't actually Mitt but Mittler...

FacebookShare

Comments (6) RSS

Oldest First Unregistered On Registered On Add a comment

Had the suspicion Romney was a pod-person. Otherwise, how could he keep fucking up his public image so badly?

Posted by Central Scrutinizer on August 23, 2012 at 12:00 PM

Somebody should make this a next level cultural meme.

Posted by McGee on August 23, 2012 at 12:18 PM

Pretty sure that Zombies eat the Coroners ... Hence no death certificate.

Posted by Will in Seattle

on August 23, 2012 at 12:33 PM

I thought the current candidate had certain cyborg-like qualities. Who do you think built him, and why? Passive-aggressive space-aliens that want us to nuke the planet clean so they can sashay over in a couple millennia when the joint cools down and settle in?

Posted by Brooklyn Reader on August 23, 2012 at 1:10 PM