Slog
News & ArtsWednesday, July 11, 2012
Religion / Tech Good Luck With That One, Fellas
Posted by Paul Constant on Wed, Jul 11, 2012 at 4:18 PM
Slog tipper Kyle says that evangelicals are considering a boycott of Google to protest Google's strong support of same-sex marriage. The problem is, it's going to be tooooo haaaaaaaard:
It's more than just a search engine. Many of us have Android phones ... many of us use Google Calendar, Google Tasks, and Gmail... YouTube, and all the other things, it's not just the search engine.
It's even worse than just Google being ubiquitous. Are evangelicals going to use Bing, instead? Microsoft is a huge supporter of gay marriage. There are very few tech and internet providers with values that the American Family Association will find suitable. The only solution is for them to start using typewriters and cast aside the whole internet as evil. It would be like a reverse Rapture: The internet would be heavenly for those of us Left Behind.
3
Oh, DO IT DO IT DOITDOITDOITDOIT!!!!!!
I so want them to boycott google. How fun will that be?!? (for the rest of us)
I so want them to boycott google. How fun will that be?!? (for the rest of us)
4
Considering China drove Google out and does their own search thing, I wonder if countries like Iran have a gay-free search engine. Might cause some right-wing heads to explode when they realize their causes are so similar.
6
I imagine an Evangelical Safe Internet products exist or will soon exist that will provide filters against sin and science.
7
Typewriters were largely made by IBM, at least in their later years, and IBM is a long-time supporter of gay rights.
International Paper, The world's largest paper country, not only supports gay rights, it has something called a "diversity council" which sounds like something the right would lose their minds over.
I think they're stuck with writing each other messages using the blood of non-gay people, written on Brawny paper towels (a Koch Brothers company), They will have to hand deliver their missives in some sort of vehicle powered by gas from ExxonMobil.
International Paper, The world's largest paper country, not only supports gay rights, it has something called a "diversity council" which sounds like something the right would lose their minds over.
I think they're stuck with writing each other messages using the blood of non-gay people, written on Brawny paper towels (a Koch Brothers company), They will have to hand deliver their missives in some sort of vehicle powered by gas from ExxonMobil.
8
@7: Actually, wouldn't it be more biblical (and satisfying to them) to write their missives with the blood of *gay* people? Because, you know, gay people should be stoned to death or whatever.
9
Wait, so if they try this boycott in full, against all companies that support gay rights for their employees and the general public, then they'll put themselves back in the dark ages and we'll never hear from them again? GO FOR IT!
10
@6, have you ever experienced Christian Rock, or Christian Literature? Given the the baseline level of incompetence that seems to be the uniting element in Christian parallel culture, switching over to a Christian ISP and using a Christian search engine would effectively be the same as quitting the internet, or at best traveling back in time and using the internet from 15 years ago while the rest of us happily inhabit the future.
11
You might want to ask for whom this particular bell tolls. These guys are ridiculous, but what will you do when Google pisses you off and you find it equally hard to escape it?
17
@14 Yeah, 'cause Conservapedia was such a huge success! Alexa rank 48,838! 14,888 in the US! Woot!
Wikipedia: Alexa rank 6. Oops. Conservapedia fail!
By comparison, Alexa ranks 476-500 in the US contain Urbanspoon, Bitly, 4chan and about 20 sites you never heard of.
Wikipedia: Alexa rank 6. Oops. Conservapedia fail!
By comparison, Alexa ranks 476-500 in the US contain Urbanspoon, Bitly, 4chan and about 20 sites you never heard of.
19
Well there was that recent Jewish rally in NYC to discuss how best to permit the Internet into kosher homes. Maybe these clowns could all get together?
But I would strongly encourage the American Fascist Association to start putting together a team that will build the Christian alternative to google. J-search, J-phone, J-calendar, J-mail. The whole works. They could spend countless hours & more importantly dollars on building products nobody wants & only a handful of crackpots will use.
But I would strongly encourage the American Fascist Association to start putting together a team that will build the Christian alternative to google. J-search, J-phone, J-calendar, J-mail. The whole works. They could spend countless hours & more importantly dollars on building products nobody wants & only a handful of crackpots will use.
20
"The only solution is for them to start using typewriters and cast aside the whole internet as evil."
Or they could pull a Bill Adama and declare that computers become agents of evil as soon as you network them.
@19: J-date. Oops! Taken!
Or they could pull a Bill Adama and declare that computers become agents of evil as soon as you network them.
@19: J-date. Oops! Taken!
21
Apparently y'all don't know about the internet juggernaut seekfind.org: "The mission of SeekFind.org is to provide God-honoring, biblically based, and theologically sound Christian search engine results in a highly accurate and well-organized format."
The top search result for Obama: "Is Barack Obama the antichrist?" Try getting THAT kind of accuracy and organization from Google.
The top search result for Obama: "Is Barack Obama the antichrist?" Try getting THAT kind of accuracy and organization from Google.
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