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News & ArtsThursday, June 28, 2012
LGBTQITSLFA National Go Out to a Gay Bar and Have a Drink Day
Posted by Dan Savage on Thu, Jun 28, 2012 at 10:59 AM
The modern LGBT civil rights movement began when a bunch of tipsy queens in a gay bar decided to fight back. Today is the 43rd anniversary of the Stonewall Riots and every year we have parades and celebrations to commemorate that event. But Pride doesn't usually fall on the exact date of the Stonewall Riots, and many cities celebrate Pride weeks or even months after the anniversary. Gay bars, the first places we came together as a community, may be going extinct. So it seems to me that dropping by a gay bar for a drink on the actual anniversary of the Stonewall Riots—dropping by while we still can—to raise a glass to the queens who get this party revolution started, well, that would be a fitting way to mark the actual anniversary of the riots, wouldn't it?
And, hey, maybe should make it an annual thing.
4
Gay bars will be fine as long as gays like to drink. And I'll be out tonight supporting my favorite bar.
6
Any bars with drag queens or bars that are particularly trans friendly? That would be most appropriate, wouldn't it?
7
How does this fit with the "straight girls are not welcome to have their bachelorette parties at gay bars" thing from a few weeks back?
9
@2 The kind that started as a lesbian bar, but then quickly realized that the only lesbians that spend money at bars hang out exclusively at the Wildrose.
10
Eh, I'm just not a fan of bars in general. Everyone is drunk, its often pretty loud, and most people are either already with their group or they are trolling for ass (nothing wrong with that, just wish it was my ass they were trolling). And I never know what to do with myself. As a certified Flying Monkey of Dan Savage, I guess I'll do it, but it's still not my idea of a good time.
11
@9 - untrue. Many lesbians who spend money don't go to gay bars at all any more because the Wildrose has been lame for at least the last 10 years and we don't have other options in this city.
13
I've never really liked gay bars. When I have gone the atmosphere was a cross between attitude and desperation - not exactly a fun time. No wonder those looking to hook up are turning to Internet based tools.
14
I think a fitting way to mark the actual anniversary of the riots is to have an actual gay riot. Who's in?
15
I want to support gay bars. I just don't drink alcohol and they charge too much for soda. Soda should be free. It would help them.
18
as a hetro vagino-american, i approve this. wish i could join you tonight, but, well, i'm not gay and therefore not welcome at these kinda joints, as has been pointed out on previous posts regarding gay bars. but you all have a good time, mmkay?
20
@18 I feel welcome enough when I go with my husband and roommates. I do feel ignored, despite how I dress, while my husband gets all the attention. But now that I know I'm wasting my mascara, it is just a lot of fun. Oh and I know to leave well before hooking up commences, just so I don't make the guys feel like I'm intruding.
23
@18, I don't venture into the gay bars often, as I am also hetero and a vag owner. However, whenever I've gone into one, I've never felt rejected or unwelcome.
25
7 and 18, I haven't been to a gay bar in many years. But I think the argument is, if a woman wants to go to a gay bar to have a few drinks, dance, get her groove on without getting hit on, that's just fine. The specific issue was with bachelorette parties, which seemed to use gay men as props, get stupid drunk really fast, and be loud and obnoxious. Kind of the difference between being a visitor or guest in someone's space, and declaring ownership because "it's so FUN there!"
Please to be correcting me if I have the argument wrong.
Please to be correcting me if I have the argument wrong.
26
okay. i do not have a bridal gown, very bad homo. are you and baconcat going to the cuff or lobby bar?
27
The bar I'm at right now isn't gay per se, but it's right on Dupont Circle and I'm drinking something really fruity. Close enough?
28
@25, straight guy here, so definitly not an authority, but the way I understand it is that bachelorette parties are no longer generally welcome because it's rude to rub your pending nuptials in the face of a community that cannot legally marry. So I think women can still go to gay bars, get stupid drunk, be loud and obnoxious (so long as that's the general vibe of the bar)...just don't do it in conjunction with a bachelorette party while DOMA is still on the books.
29
OMG a community's HIGH TEMPLE of worship is a BAR and drinking establishment, OH LORDY what is next the Gay national anthem being based on an old English DRINKING SONG? oh? what? The American national anthem is an old English bar song, oh never mind. Raise a glass or two for Gay-dom.
30
@7
How does this fit with the "straight girls are not welcome to have their bachelorette parties at gay bars" thing from a few weeks back?
---------------
From what I gathered in the interview with the owner of The Abbey in West Hollywood, it was motivated by the fact that gay men and women can't marry, and for people to have Stag and Hen parties there was simply rubbing that fact in our faces.
And on an entirely personal note. Have you been in a gay bar when one of these bachelorette parties has been going on? They (broad sweeping generalization here, and it stays) want to take over the bar and be the center of attention. If a group of gay men went into a straight bar and carried on in the same manner, they'd be asked to leave, or worse.
There are way more straight bars than there are gay bars. It's not as though there isn't someplace else they could hold their dos.
Let the flaming begin.
How does this fit with the "straight girls are not welcome to have their bachelorette parties at gay bars" thing from a few weeks back?
---------------
From what I gathered in the interview with the owner of The Abbey in West Hollywood, it was motivated by the fact that gay men and women can't marry, and for people to have Stag and Hen parties there was simply rubbing that fact in our faces.
And on an entirely personal note. Have you been in a gay bar when one of these bachelorette parties has been going on? They (broad sweeping generalization here, and it stays) want to take over the bar and be the center of attention. If a group of gay men went into a straight bar and carried on in the same manner, they'd be asked to leave, or worse.
There are way more straight bars than there are gay bars. It's not as though there isn't someplace else they could hold their dos.
Let the flaming begin.
31
@26 We usually do The Cuff during the week but we're being lazy tonight...let's hang out soon though!
32
@18 as a woman who never gets or got hit on anywhere, by anyone (I'm married, but I had to go and hunt him and all my previous boyfriends out, LOL) I find gay bars and gay men fabulous. I don't feel ugly, I've never felt unwelcome, and the eye candy is for free.
And I did feel guilty about being married while my gay friends could not and cannot, but I still did it because the way the law treats kids of unmarried couples in my country sucks big time. A bachelorette party at a gay bar seems incredibly bad taste, except in countries with true marriage equality.
And I did feel guilty about being married while my gay friends could not and cannot, but I still did it because the way the law treats kids of unmarried couples in my country sucks big time. A bachelorette party at a gay bar seems incredibly bad taste, except in countries with true marriage equality.
33
Vagina-possessor here who salivates nearly exclusively over men: Bachelorette parties should be banned everywhere.
34
@28 I just went to my normal hang out, a sports bar, and ordered some "gay" drinks for myself and the guys I know there.
I don't know if I changed minds about marriage equality, equal rights in general, or my orientation (at least previously correctly assumed to be straight), but the anniversary was marked and remarked.
I don't know if I changed minds about marriage equality, equal rights in general, or my orientation (at least previously correctly assumed to be straight), but the anniversary was marked and remarked.
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