Nearly One Thousand Ref. 74 Signatures Disputed: The referendum that would take gay marriage to the ballot ran into some difficulties yesterday.
Sweet Deal: Somali Islamist group Al-Shabaab is offering a 10-camel bounty for President Obama, and two camels for Secretary of State Hillary Clinton.
Stop Shooting Stuff, Please: A car driving on I-5 north of Everett is hit by gunfire after witnessing a couple of cars "mixing it up," road-rage style.
Israel to Open Massive Detention Camp: Tens of thousands of African immigrants are to be moved to a detention camp after Israel decides the large number "threatens the Jewish identity."
Penguins Just Wanna Have Fun: An Antarctic expedition one hundred years ago omitted details about the "depraved" sex lives of penguins after discovering that they fuck dead penguins and rape and inadvertently kill others.
Latino Voters Not Turning Out: Latinos aren't voting in numbers that reflect their potential strength at the ballot box.
An All-You-Can-Eat Buffett: Charity auction winner forks over $3.5 million to have dinner with Warren Buffett.
Whatever You Say, Boss: Spanish officials are stoked about a €100 billion banks bailout, but Spanish prime minister Mariano Rajoy prefers to call it a "soft loan."
Oh Happy Day: Five thousand
poor bastards lucky University of Washington students graduated yesterday.
Speaking of Which: The Atlantic Wire rounds up the best commencement speeches of 2012.
At It Again: As you read this, Rafael Nadal and Novak Djokovic are competing for the French Open title, their fourth consecutive Grand Slam matchup.
And now, an adorable toddler sips his first root beer: