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Sunday, June 10, 2012

The Sunday Morning News

Posted by on Sun, Jun 10, 2012 at 9:24 AM

Nearly One Thousand Ref. 74 Signatures Disputed: The referendum that would take gay marriage to the ballot ran into some difficulties yesterday.

Sweet Deal: Somali Islamist group Al-Shabaab is offering a 10-camel bounty for President Obama, and two camels for Secretary of State Hillary Clinton.

Stop Shooting Stuff, Please: A car driving on I-5 north of Everett is hit by gunfire after witnessing a couple of cars "mixing it up," road-rage style.

Israel to Open Massive Detention Camp: Tens of thousands of African immigrants are to be moved to a detention camp after Israel decides the large number "threatens the Jewish identity."

Penguins Just Wanna Have Fun: An Antarctic expedition one hundred years ago omitted details about the "depraved" sex lives of penguins after discovering that they fuck dead penguins and rape and inadvertently kill others.

Latino Voters Not Turning Out: Latinos aren't voting in numbers that reflect their potential strength at the ballot box.

An All-You-Can-Eat Buffett: Charity auction winner forks over $3.5 million to have dinner with Warren Buffett.

Whatever You Say, Boss: Spanish officials are stoked about a €100 billion banks bailout, but Spanish prime minister Mariano Rajoy prefers to call it a "soft loan."

Oh Happy Day: Five thousand poor bastards lucky University of Washington students graduated yesterday.

Speaking of Which: The Atlantic Wire rounds up the best commencement speeches of 2012.

At It Again: As you read this, Rafael Nadal and Novak Djokovic are competing for the French Open title, their fourth consecutive Grand Slam matchup.

And now, an adorable toddler sips his first root beer:


Comments (29) RSS

Oldest First Unregistered On Registered On Add a comment
wow what a booze hound......
Posted by *HIC!* on June 10, 2012 at 9:44 AM · Report this
OuterCow 2
And since money is fungible and we give the Israeli government billions of dollars every year, in a very real way we too are paying for these racist detention camps.
Posted by OuterCow on June 10, 2012 at 9:44 AM · Report this
Cato the Younger Younger 3
Israeli detention camps for people who are not part of the accepted race. I suppose we can't compare that in anyway to anything that happened in Germany during the late 1930's.
Posted by Cato the Younger Younger on June 10, 2012 at 9:46 AM · Report this
reverend dr dj riz 4
i don't have a comment for this..but thought it worth a peek.…
Posted by reverend dr dj riz on June 10, 2012 at 10:00 AM · Report this
rob! 5
"Latino voters not turning out": No kidding. If I'm in town, I always like to drop off my mail ballot in person on election day. At last Tuesday's election in my neck of the wasteland, where the ballot was loaded with teabaggy minutemen types, I saw not a single Hispanic face among a sea of white faces in the large hall being used as a polling place. (Nobody under about 35, either.)

Yet they're about 25% of the local population. And registered Republicans have dropped 7 points since 2000, while registered Democrats are up 10%.

Some could be voting by mail, but I'll bet most are opting out.
Posted by rob! on June 10, 2012 at 10:06 AM · Report this
And thus begins this child's long, slow decline into obesity and all its accompanying health-related ailments.

Thanks, parents!

And seriously, Israel - WTFF?
Posted by COMTE on June 10, 2012 at 10:10 AM · Report this
Phoebe in Wallingford 7
A country has the right to deport illegal immigrants, but humanely and on a case-by-case basis. I'm totally flabbergasted about Israel, and 1,500 is not that many.

I'm kind of relieved that we won't have toddler videos again until next weekend.
Posted by Phoebe in Wallingford on June 10, 2012 at 10:23 AM · Report this
Gern Blanston 8
You missed the best story. Leonard Meuse, the survivor of the Cafe Racer shootings, went home from the hospital yesterday.…
Posted by Gern Blanston on June 10, 2012 at 10:26 AM · Report this
Posted by biffp on June 10, 2012 at 10:31 AM · Report this
Westlake, son! 10
Com on Israel. I know the Jews got a raw deal in WW2 and you want to preserve your heritage. But there's a line, and Israel keeps drifting towards ultra evangelical Christian style bigotry.
Posted by Westlake, son! on June 10, 2012 at 10:52 AM · Report this
The penguin news kinda puts Linux in perspective.
Posted by DMonaghan on June 10, 2012 at 10:53 AM · Report this
Banna 12
"threatens the Jewish identity" meaning, "Cant keep our daughters off the schvartzes".
Posted by Banna on June 10, 2012 at 10:55 AM · Report this
DOUG. 13
I hope the R-74 signature forger serves jail time. A day for every forgery sounds about right.
Posted by DOUG. on June 10, 2012 at 10:55 AM · Report this
Some Old Nobodaddy Logged In 14
How much could we get for Romney? I'm betting it'd be a half-starved goat
Posted by Some Old Nobodaddy Logged In on June 10, 2012 at 11:11 AM · Report this
@4, that's pretty great to read about Rev. White. Thanks.
Posted by gloomy gus on June 10, 2012 at 11:46 AM · Report this
Zebes 16
Guys, guys, c'mon, Give Israel a break. They're whiter than the rest of the Middle East, remember? That means it's okay.
Posted by Zebes on June 10, 2012 at 12:14 PM · Report this
Futura Fantasia

Class 201: The Dark Ages

Today we examine the early 21st century nation state once referred to as “America” but now classified as the Dark Age.

The political and financial manipulation practiced on the masses then was through a deftly controlled network of so-called think tanks, foundations, research centers and pre-positioned academics.

An excellent example would be a pseudo-educational complex, MIT, later bombed and razed during the Revolution of 2023 (see Mbotu and Heineman, Zeno ScholarGrid, circa 2045), where academics referred to as “economists” would spread propaganda and misinformation while pretending to represent the interests of the people.

One academic poseur, whose position was financed by the military-intel firm, Mitre, would mislead and confuse on labor economics.

Another academic poseur, whose position was financed through a series of phantom foundations by the oligarch, the family known as the Rockefellers, would mix truth and fiction, confusing and bewildering the masses while claiming that his backers, the Rockefellers, had given away their fortune through philanthropy.

These were dark times, indeed!

The same political henchmen and women would continue to re-surface in presidential administration through presidential administration, from the Carter administration through Reagan, Bush, Clinton, Bush (the son of the previously mentioned Bush – evidently some type of quasi-dynastic rule?), Obama and Mueller; difficult to believe so many were so easily duped, but literacy was at an all-time low during the Dark Age.

The ruling oligarchs of that period had succeeded in hiding their ownership and wealth, and the populace strangely enough appeared to remain incurious as to who exerted control over their daily lives.

Many routinely believed the political lackeys and servants of the oligarchs were actually in control – difficult as that may be to accept today – that was the reality in that era. (See Rule by the Hegemon, Chao and Zuma, circa 2051).

“Class, please review Chapter 17: Mind Control Through Cloud Computing and Social Networking for next week.”

[Soft tones signal end of session]

Note: Futura Fantasia was the name Ray Bradbury gave his high school newspaper which he published frequently during his later school years.

Ray Bradbury
Rest In Peace, Oh Mighty and Eloquent Wordsmith.
Posted by sgt_doom on June 10, 2012 at 12:28 PM · Report this
That is awesome news. Thanks for posting it!
Posted by Senor Guy on June 10, 2012 at 12:43 PM · Report this

Great moments in lost urbism:

How many of you remember the proposal for the Seattle Commons that was shot down by voters in 1995?

Seattle voters reject the Seattle Commons levy on September 19, 1995.

On September 19, 1995, Seattle voters reject by a narrow 47 to 53 percent margin a $111 million property-tax levy that would have funded the development and construction of the Seattle Commons. Designed as a 61-acre park stretching from downtown Seattle to Lake Union, the Seattle Commons has been envisioned as a vast civic lawn framed by high-tech laboratories, condos, restaurants, and urban amenities.…
Posted by Supreme Ruler Of The Universe http://_ on June 10, 2012 at 1:23 PM · Report this
eclexia 20
I like the name "Detention Camp". I think it must be like that movie "The Breakfast Club". They should have called it "Saturday Detention Camp". Then everyone would understand the sort of wacky hijinx that must go on inside.

Also, many kids get detentions because they have trouble concentrating. So I look forward to hearing that they teach concentration in these camps. That would be better final solution to the issue.
Posted by eclexia on June 10, 2012 at 1:29 PM · Report this
Last of the Time Lords 21
@20, you win Slog for the day
Posted by Last of the Time Lords on June 10, 2012 at 1:36 PM · Report this
Why are all the African refugees crossing Egypt to get to Isreal? Since Israel is like Nazi Germany (which people keep implying) why are they not staying in Egypt, Algeria, Tunisia? Perhaps you guys may want to look into the anti Zimbabwean hate crimes committed by black South Africans before you harp on the Isrealis. Implying these detension camps are like death camps is laughable. Why if Isreal, America and Europe is so horrible to African and Muslims millions are still attempting to get in by all means necessary?
Posted by Andrew S. on June 10, 2012 at 1:39 PM · Report this
rob! 23
@20, it's always such a head-scratcher over what exactly to call such places, isn't it? Goodness gracious. Relocation center? Detention camp? Internment center? Refugee protection zone? Concentration camp? One wants so very badly to say it just right.
Posted by rob! on June 10, 2012 at 1:44 PM · Report this
i bet if you gave a kid his first bumps of cocaine they would react more or less exactly the same way. Just sayin...
Posted by SpGNo on June 10, 2012 at 1:47 PM · Report this
Michael of the Green 25
"Root beer makes you HAPPY!" exclaims mother, thereby wiring him for life.
Posted by Michael of the Green on June 10, 2012 at 2:46 PM · Report this
What the hell? Who gives their toddler soda?
Posted by MikeB on June 10, 2012 at 7:04 PM · Report this
Keekee 27
What country do you live in???
Posted by Keekee on June 10, 2012 at 9:13 PM · Report this
It's hilarious how uptight people are about soda these days. When I was a kid, my brother and sister and I were given soda on special occasions and none of us turned out obese. And as children, we actually ate candy sometimes too. The humanity!
Posted by Amanda on June 11, 2012 at 9:39 AM · Report this
@28, shh! You'll interrupt the judgement. And then they'll have nothing to make themselves feel good.
Posted by LJM on June 11, 2012 at 11:58 AM · Report this

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