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Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Seattle Center Announces Partnership With Coca-Cola to Poison Our Children With High Fructose Corn Syrup. Or something.

Posted by on Wed, Apr 18, 2012 at 3:07 PM

Great news! The Seattle Center is teaming up with Coca-Cola to make it the "official beverage" of the Center and its Next Fifty celebration!

Under the partnership agreement, as outlined in a letter of intent, Coca-Cola will offer assistance and support in the areas of public programming, fundraising, education and outreach.

Also, Coca-Cola will sell a lot of sugar water. Yay!

The Coca-Cola support will help Seattle Center to continue to offer a quality experience to the millions of visitors to Seattle Center each year.

Also, it will help sell a lot of sugar water.

“We warmly welcome our new partner, one that shares the Center’s commitment to building sustainable communities, reducing its environmental footprint and supporting active, healthy living...” said Seattle Center Director Robert Nellams.

Also, he welcomes Coca-Cola's commitment to selling a lot of sugar water.

“Coca-Cola is honored to anchor our growing presence in Seattle by becoming the official beverage partner for Seattle Center,” said Bill O’Brien, senior vice president and general manager for Coca-Cola Refreshments’ Northwest Region.

Also, Coca-Cola is honored to be selling a lot of sugar water.


I'm not opposed to "partnerships" like this. Times are tough, money is short, and the Seattle Center is gonna sell a lot of sugar water regardless. So if city officials can squeeze a little extra cash out of Coca-Cola in exchange for the concessions rights, more power to them.

But please don't send me a fucking press release pretending to be proud about it.

UPDATE: In response to my query, city spokesperson Deborah Daoust says that Coca-Cola will provide a "cash investment of $420,000 over five years" in exchange for its official beverage status. Worth it?


Comments (31) RSS

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Baconcat 1
So what do we call blatant advertisements parading around as press releases? I'm sure there's a word with the panache needed to convey the sort of fuckery this involves.
Posted by Baconcat on April 18, 2012 at 3:12 PM · Report this
Zebes 2
Promotional advertising deals?! In MY public spaces?!
Posted by Zebes on April 18, 2012 at 3:13 PM · Report this
Coca-cola has a "growing presence" in Seattle? It's fucking COKE. It's not like we just heard of it. How much more growth could there possibly be?
Posted by pox on April 18, 2012 at 3:20 PM · Report this
meh, Pepsi rules
Posted by genevieve on April 18, 2012 at 3:22 PM · Report this
Urgutha Forka 5
The world is owned by big, multinational corporations.

This is capitalism. This is what we wanted, apparently.
Posted by Urgutha Forka on April 18, 2012 at 3:27 PM · Report this
Vince 6
As long as they aren't passing any "stand your ground" laws around here with their right wing pals, then let's have a Coke.
Posted by Vince on April 18, 2012 at 3:28 PM · Report this
Vince 7
P.S. How is it that Coke tastes so goddamn good with pizza, anyway???
Posted by Vince on April 18, 2012 at 3:29 PM · Report this
Mike 8
"please don't send me a fucking press release pretending to be proud about it."

If they didn't, there probably wouldn't be a deal. I imagine the whole point of this from Coke's perspective is the PR.
Posted by Mike on April 18, 2012 at 3:30 PM · Report this
Hernandez 9
Like you said, it's not like they won't sell a ton of Coke products in the absence of a partnership agreement.

Although I wouldn't count on seeing every child at the Center guzzling an endless amount of soda. Have you seen today's average yuppie Seattle helicopter parent? (In fact, aren't you one of those parents?) Soda is the devil to those people. It's a far cry from when I was young and our folks didn't bat an eye if we drank Super Big Gulps every day during summer break.
Posted by Hernandez on April 18, 2012 at 3:32 PM · Report this
Wait, you figure a press release pretending to be proud of it isn't part of the deal we forced them to take? Yeesh. We citizens have made super clear we don't like paying for things. So we get shit like our current tax system. And give public entities like the Center little defense against such glittering moneymakers as Chihuly museums and Coke partnerships.
Posted by gloomy gus on April 18, 2012 at 3:33 PM · Report this
JF 11
@9 What's "helicopter" imply in the Yuppie Helicopter Parent comment?
Posted by JF on April 18, 2012 at 3:46 PM · Report this

Coca Cola promotes density.

Great for growing Seattle boys and girls!

Posted by Supreme Ruler Of The Universe http://_ on April 18, 2012 at 3:47 PM · Report this
Will in Seattle 13
We need Chai not Cola!
Posted by Will in Seattle on April 18, 2012 at 3:51 PM · Report this
emor 15

Come one now. Beer tastes 1000% better with pizza than any sugar beverage.

It implies excessive hovering. Over-protective napalm bombs of love.
Posted by emor on April 18, 2012 at 3:58 PM · Report this
Posted by COMTE on April 18, 2012 at 4:00 PM · Report this
Hernandez 17
@11 From Wikipedia: "like helicopters, they hover closely overhead, rarely out of reach, whether their children need them or not."
Posted by Hernandez on April 18, 2012 at 4:04 PM · Report this
Fnarf 18
I prefer Peksi.
Posted by Fnarf on April 18, 2012 at 4:19 PM · Report this
Kinison 19
Isnt The Stranger newspaper, one massive advertisement?

Its 10 pages of articles and 40 pages of ads.
Posted by Kinison on April 18, 2012 at 4:25 PM · Report this
Absolutely worth it. Goldy gonna come up with $420k over five years? Kids not gonna drink sugar water if we don't do it? They'll likely sell more of their branded tap water anyway. It's OK mommy Goldy.
Posted by BLUE on April 18, 2012 at 4:37 PM · Report this
Baconcat 21
@18: Wherein I accuse you of liking George Lopez.
Posted by Baconcat on April 18, 2012 at 4:44 PM · Report this
You could always try monitoring what your kids consume. Or just say fuck 'em. Either way.
Posted by Amanda on April 18, 2012 at 4:58 PM · Report this
tainte 24
man, you guys are gonna be royally pissed when they start putting up advertising at bobby morris playfield, right across from your orifice.
Posted by tainte on April 18, 2012 at 5:11 PM · Report this
At least make it real sugar Coke. Like the Mexican Coke available around here. It tastes much better.
Posted by fairly.unbalanced on April 18, 2012 at 5:14 PM · Report this
McGee 26
Good luck trying to sell all that Coke to nobody.
Posted by McGee on April 18, 2012 at 5:28 PM · Report this
Fnarf 27
@21, oh dear, is that a George Lopez bit? I swear, I have never seen more than five consecutive seconds of his act, passing through Comedy Central. I heard it somewhere. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
Posted by Fnarf on April 18, 2012 at 5:54 PM · Report this
@6 - You realize WA is already a "stand your ground" state, right?
Posted by Tawnos on April 18, 2012 at 6:46 PM · Report this
Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn 30
Taking your kids anywhere in the Seattle Center is not much different than leaving them in front of the TV. Wall to wall commercials everywhere you turn. The Seattle Center long ago quit being a place to give kids in Seattle a decent childhood.

Nuke it from space and start over. It's the only way to be sure. And take your kids to the Locks or the Arboretum in the mean time.
Posted by Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn on April 18, 2012 at 8:51 PM · Report this
Less than $100K a year is not that much of a quid-pro-quo. I would have preferred to see some bidding with an open-to-the-public view into how this comes about. It's s'posed to be our Center and our living room/family lounge but it's rare that we're considered in the discussions. I suppose KEXP is the official radio station/webcaster for the Seattle Center, eh?
Posted by Chas Redmond on April 18, 2012 at 9:59 PM · Report this
Westlake, son! 32
Coke is better than Pepsi. Pepsi is too sweet. I come to Coke for the better bubbles too. And their excellent cherry variety (Warren Buffet is a fan).

If Pepsi just accepted their fate as the "zany" cola company I think we'd all be happier about it. Where's my damn Crystal Pepsi? Put a Twizzler in that. Bam! Why the hell doesn't Pepsi buy Jones Soda already? I want some Turkey Pepsi, fuck yeah!
Posted by Westlake, son! on April 19, 2012 at 12:06 AM · Report this
Theodore Gorath 33
Why the hell isn't BetaryBilly2 ever blocked for clearly trolling? It is all the guy does, and he doesn't even try to hide it by pretending he has a position on the issue.

Posted by Theodore Gorath on April 19, 2012 at 8:36 AM · Report this
Joe M 34
Of course it's worth it. And if it isn't do you know what's gonna happen? You're going to have to answer to the Coca-Cola Company.
Posted by Joe M on April 19, 2012 at 9:06 AM · Report this

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