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Tuesday, April 3, 2012

US Supreme Court Affirms Warrantless Ass Searches

Posted by on Tue, Apr 3, 2012 at 9:18 AM

Turns out Cienna can continue to cover SPD with impunity, despite yesterday's fascistic 5-4 Supreme Court decision authorizing unlimited strip and body cavity searches of prisoners, without probable cause, and no matter how minor the offense. The suit was brought by a New Jersey man who was repeatedly strip searched and body cavity searched after being arrested on an erroneous seven-year-old warrant on an "unpaid" fine he'd already paid (he even showed the arresting officer the receipt). But according to a majority of justices on the highest court in the land, that's just the American way. Yay!

Essentially, police officers and prison guards are now free to use body cavity searches as a form of punishment and humiliation. Welcome to Abu Ghraib.

My first thought upon hearing the news was that Cienna might not want to be so cavalier about her jaywalking, especially so close to the East Precinct. All it takes is one pissed off police officer, and Cienna could find herself squatting naked on a concrete floor, with officers looking up her ass. But thankfully, Washington is one of a handful of states that places statutory limits on looking up Cienna's ass without a warrant.

So feel free, Cienna, to continue fearlessly covering Rich O'Neill as the feckless bag of limp dicks you say he is. (And "smelly," Cienna clarifies.)


Comments (28) RSS

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p good post 7/10
Posted by Swearengen on April 3, 2012 at 9:29 AM · Report this
Phoebe in Wallingford 2
Interesting how, in this case, that the conservative side of the Supreme Court is not conservative at all when it comes to this flavor of excessive government intrusion.
Posted by Phoebe in Wallingford on April 3, 2012 at 9:31 AM · Report this
@2: Now now, they're only interested in small government because they're worried it won't fit inside vaginas otherwise.
Posted by suddenlyorcas on April 3, 2012 at 9:33 AM · Report this
sloegin 4
States that make the job of the police as easy as possible are by definition Police States.
Posted by sloegin on April 3, 2012 at 9:36 AM · Report this
seandr 5
Horrifying how politicized that court has become, and Alito and Roberts will be there a long long time.
Posted by seandr on April 3, 2012 at 9:37 AM · Report this
Vince 6
Posted by Vince on April 3, 2012 at 9:41 AM · Report this

You wouldn't want prisoners being held for felonies like manslaughter and rape to feel that kind of embarrassment.
Posted by Supreme Ruler Of The Universe http://_ on April 3, 2012 at 9:46 AM · Report this
Fnarf 8
This post looks like sexual harassment in the workplace to me.
Posted by Fnarf on April 3, 2012 at 9:50 AM · Report this
Urgutha Forka 9
What are you talking about? Conservatives have always been in favor of big government and of government intrusion. They're doing what they always do.
Posted by Urgutha Forka on April 3, 2012 at 9:54 AM · Report this
Matt from Denver 10
@ 9, she may be confused because she believed the teabaggers were the face of the party, and the lip service paid them by the GOP was an honest expression of their aims.
Posted by Matt from Denver on April 3, 2012 at 10:05 AM · Report this
Foghorn Leghorn 11
One of the things I've always been proudest about is that Washington state's constitution places higher restrictions on search and seizure than the 4th Amendment does.
Posted by Foghorn Leghorn on April 3, 2012 at 10:07 AM · Report this
ryanayr 12
@2 - of course the conservatives in the Soviet Union were the ones that backed massive restrictions on free speech and rejected all forms of private business transactions. Conservative is always a relative term. I read 'conservative' here, and in most cases, as 'authoritarian oligarchic corporatists'.
Posted by ryanayr on April 3, 2012 at 10:15 AM · Report this
Fifty-Two-Eighty 13
Sure thing, Goldy. And the next time you get busted, we'll be sure to give you a cellmate who hasn't had his "prison wallet" searched for a shiv. You'll have a fun time, I promise.
Posted by Fifty-Two-Eighty on April 3, 2012 at 10:17 AM · Report this
Asparagus! 14
Everybody knows the constitution grants protection against unreasonable search and seizure, what this ruling presupposes is... maybe it doesn't?
Posted by Asparagus! on April 3, 2012 at 10:19 AM · Report this
America is long dead - best to bury her corpse and move on.
Posted by Pol Pot on April 3, 2012 at 10:21 AM · Report this
@14 the reviews weren't that great.

Yeah, but the sales were.
Posted by Frank Rizzo on April 3, 2012 at 10:29 AM · Report this
Gee @13, I hadn't realized until just now that you have the ability to decide which prisoners are assigned to what specific cells...
Posted by COMTE on April 3, 2012 at 10:32 AM · Report this
The "conservatives" want big government in your life.
But they want small government in the "life" of a business.
Posted by fairly.unbalanced on April 3, 2012 at 10:39 AM · Report this
The Max 21
It's a good thing for me I'm not a cop. If I were, I'd drive to the houses of Roberts, Alito, Scalia, Thomas, and Kennedy, serve each with a specious warrant, and ass-search each of their asses.
Posted by The Max on April 3, 2012 at 11:06 AM · Report this
I was just wishing that Ginsburg and Breyer would retire now so that Obama could appoint their replacements, but the Republicans in Congress would stall until Romney took office. Does anyone know if an appointment is stalled until a new President takes office, the new President can trump the previous appointment?
Posted by sarah70 on April 3, 2012 at 11:23 AM · Report this
Reverse Polarity 23
At the risk of sounding far more conservative than I am, I have to side with 5280 here. Have you ever been to jail? Strip searches, while somewhat demeaning, actually make jails MUCH safer. Without such searches, there would be far more weapons in jails. Personally, if I'm ever put in jail for some minor offense, I'd rather not be stabbed to death by some other inmate who wasn't properly searched.

The problem here isn't the search. The problem is the unjustified arrest in the first place. Albert Florence should have sued for false arrest rather than wining about the strip searches.
Posted by Reverse Polarity on April 3, 2012 at 11:36 AM · Report this
Phoebe in Wallingford 24
@23: Good points that a lot of us never considered.
Posted by Phoebe in Wallingford on April 3, 2012 at 11:50 AM · Report this
Right. Because the problem with jail is jay walkers who hide knives in their butts.
No. If it is a minor offense then it is unlikely that the person is carrying a knife in his butt.
If you are stabbed in jail by a guy with a butt knife then it is probably by a repeat offender who planned ahead.
Posted by fairly.unbalanced on April 3, 2012 at 11:57 AM · Report this
Fifty-Two-Eighty 26
@25: Do tell, how many cavity searches have you done on people? Oh, that's what I thought. Truth is, you have no fucking clue how many people are walking around with stuff up their butts right now, do you?

You'd be surprised.
Posted by Fifty-Two-Eighty on April 3, 2012 at 12:12 PM · Report this
Theodore Gorath 27
I have volunteered at a state prison for years, and when you are in prison you do not have any right to privacy at all.

Restricting rights is the punishment, and prison officials can already strip and cavity search a prisoner without probable cause. The same way they can tell them when to eat and shower, what cell to sleep in, and where they can go in the prison.

If you are arguing about a certain person being in prison in the first place, that is a completely different issue, and has nothing to do with searches.
Posted by Theodore Gorath on April 3, 2012 at 12:49 PM · Report this
SPG 28
Let's separate the hard core prison fantasy from the reality that most of us will find more common...strip search as punishment for minor offenses.
Back in the early 90's New Jersey wanted to crack down on the number of people driving without insurance. A middle aged professional woman driving her car to NYC gets stopped in an insurance check and doesn't have her insurance card because her husband has it in his wallet in a different car. The cop is giving her a hard time and she's calling bullshit on it. She gets arrested for driving without insurance. Since she's now a "prisoner" she gets strip searched. All this could have been cleared up with a call to her insurance agent, but instead she gets the gulag treatment and it's all perfectly legal.
Posted by SPG on April 3, 2012 at 12:51 PM · Report this
"Do tell, how many cavity searches have you done on people? Oh, that's what I thought."

Really? How is it that you haven't won the lottery yet? Or is it that you can read minds?

Oh! You were just pretending. You thought the number was zero. I guess that invalidates the rest of your comment as well.

We're talking jail here. Not prison. Just about every little town out there with a cop has a jail.
And now those cops are legally allowed to strip search ANYONE for ANY OFFENSE including NO OFFENSE AT ALL (as was shown in the case before the SCOTUS).
Posted by fairly.unbalanced on April 3, 2012 at 1:12 PM · Report this
Interesting that Obama is on the side of the conservative authoritarians and 5280 (but that's redundant).
Posted by LJM on April 3, 2012 at 6:17 PM · Report this

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