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Friday, February 17, 2012

Dudes / Politics / Economy Ever Wondered What It Would Be Like to Be Trapped in an Underground Hangar with the President?

Posted by Cienna Madrid on Fri, Feb 17, 2012 at 11:58 AM

Toby Crittenden, Program Director of the Washington Bus, is one of a lucky few hundred non-Boeing employees picked to stand in an underground hangar at the Boeing factory while President Obama rubs exfoliated elbows with workers and shouts about jobs (spoiler alert: they're important!).

I asked Toby to text me breathless updates about his trip because I am incredibly nosy and he is incredibly obliging. Here's what he's noted so far:

"Presidential politics brings everybody out. This isn't your run-of-the-mill political hack crowd. Many different faces here. We're busing past giant airplane engines basking in the great outdoors... now we're in a giant tunnel under the Boeing plant. It looks like the set of a scifi movie—like Battlestar Galactica, minus the threat of human eradication, and soundtracked by serious smooth jazz jams. The energy in this tunnel is as tense as your average unarmed jawa in a tatooed bar (again, minus the threat of human eradication)."

For all you non Battlestar Galactica fans, here's what that looks like (BYOSmoothJazz):

Toby Crittenden
"I suppose the only thing left to do is propagate the human species."

Toby says the president has alighted from a Boeing plane and is preparing to address the crowd:

Toby Crittenden

I love how everyone in this pic is staring at the president through the lens of their phone, rather than looking at the real-life president staring them in the face.

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Comments (22) RSS

Oldest First Unregistered On Registered On Add a comment

I want to know more about you and Tony, Cienna!

Posted by jnonymous on February 17, 2012 at 12:04 PM

@1, huh?

Posted by Cienna Madrid on February 17, 2012 at 12:07 PM

Tatooine, goddamn autocorrect.

Posted by wisepunk on February 17, 2012 at 12:09 PM

@2, obviously, any male you mention by name in a story is a romantic partner, right?

That building is quite large.

Posted by Fnarf

on February 17, 2012 at 12:09 PM

Quite large, indeed!

Posted by fARTing on February 17, 2012 at 12:13 PM

so essentially Obama just was quoting the Wire during his speech, right? (we used to make shit in this country) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T-j5XWo1f…

Posted by Jackson Hathorn on February 17, 2012 at 12:20 PM

They did already make a movie about being trapped in an underground hangar w/ the POTUS, but it wasn't BSG; it was Independence Day.

Posted by Geocrackr on February 17, 2012 at 12:22 PM

@4, wow! I could single-handedly redefine the term "media whore" if that were true.

Posted by Cienna Madrid on February 17, 2012 at 12:22 PM

cienna, maybe he is talking about your long term relationship with tony of "tony's party pizza" fame?

toby and obama are two of my favorite bad asses.

Posted by alithea on February 17, 2012 at 12:22 PM

@9

Autocorrect kicked in. It replaced "dumb asses" with "bad asses".

Posted by delbert on February 17, 2012 at 12:32 PM

@9, or is it Tony Roma? Or is it BOTH? Tony the Tiger? What the hell kind of freak show are you guys running up in there, anyways?

Posted by Fnarf

on February 17, 2012 at 12:54 PM

What was Boeing's stand on ME?

Same as Obama's?

Posted by Supreme Ruler Of The Universe

on February 17, 2012 at 12:58 PM

Why are y'all referring to the largest BUILDING on earth (by volume) as an "Underground Hangar?"

Posted by Gordon Werner on February 17, 2012 at 1:07 PM

Wow! Boing allowed cell phones (and picture taking) in their plant/hanger.

Posted by Simone on February 17, 2012 at 1:15 PM

Toby rules

Posted by JonnoN on February 17, 2012 at 1:16 PM

Toby and Cienna, sitting in a tree, t-e-x-t-i-n-g.

Posted by gloomy gus on February 17, 2012 at 1:47 PM

@13 The tour takes you though the underground tunnel system that serves as a primary human access point. It's about a mile from the entrance to the center, and then you take an elevator to the catwalk area to see the scope of the building. A lot of the "people zones" are indeed underground.

Posted by Sir Vic on February 17, 2012 at 1:57 PM

It's all mediated reality these days. See the president through your cell phone display. Take your kid to the Children's Museum to experience something hands on? No, the Children's Museum puts out XBoxes for your kits to play with now. XBoxes. Really.

Pretty soon sex will be mediated through a virtual reality display. Like in Demolition Man. It's the new Dark Ages.

Posted by Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn

on February 17, 2012 at 5:08 PM

Mr. President! We must not allow a underground commercial aircraft assembly plant gap!!!

Posted by COMTE

on February 17, 2012 at 6:25 PM

The really funny thing about everyone collectively viewing a personally mediated president, is that the very president himself is a manufactured personality, and is a fabricated illusion -- not really himself! Where do the layers of representation stop? Glass onion, people, glass onion.

Posted by treacle on February 17, 2012 at 6:28 PM

I don't get it. Ain't no Underground Hangar at Boeing Everett.

Posted by Sandman on February 17, 2012 at 7:08 PM