Holy Fuck: "A massive fire swept through an overcrowded prison in Honduras and killed more than 350 inmates, including many trapped screaming inside their cells, officials said on Wednesday."

Now Something Happy: A bulldog has adopted 6 wild boar piglets. Squeeeeee!! CUTE!

Iran Stops Oil Exports to Six European Countries: "Responding to European Union sanctions on Iran’s banking and energy sectors, including a boycott of new oil contracts with Iran, the government said it would no longer export oil to Italy, France, Spain, the Netherlands, Greece and Portugal." They've also made advancements with nuclear power (but not nuclear weapons, they say).

Florida Will Execute Robert Waterhouse Today: The 65-year-old man has spent more than 30 years on death row for the murder of Deborah Kammerer, who was raped, beaten, and drowned.

Chris Brown Responds To Critics Via Twitter: "HATE ALL U WANT BECUZ I GOT A GRAMMY Now! That's the ultimate FUCK OFF!" Way to show maturity, asshole. (The Tweets have since been deleted and Brown claims he didn't write them. Right.)

A Seattle Man Is on the New Season of Survivor: And he's not wearing a shirt.

A Kent Cop Shot a Man Who Was Holding a Knife: The man was taken to Harborview and the police officer is on paid administrative leave (which is standard procedure in officer-involved shootings).

Why Was Traffic So Shitty Yesterday?: A semi-truck, which was hauling eggs, flipped over and blocked all four southbound lanes on I-5. Four people were injured.

School Levy Voters Support Basic Services: "They're OK with continuing to support basic school services, but they still don't think it's time to splurge on major construction."

Oops: A Valentine's Day helium balloon took out a California substation and cut power to over 15,000 customers. How romantic!

William and Kate Get Barbie'd: The William doll has way too much hair.

For the record, Tommy is my favorite Smothers Brother.