Slog Music

Music, Nightlife,
and Drinks

Monday, February 13, 2012

Planned Parenthood Exposed!

Posted by on Mon, Feb 13, 2012 at 8:22 AM

Did you know that Planned Parenthood's whole thing is to use "sex education" to turn kids into sex addicts so it can make a fortune selling them birth control, STD treatments, and abortions? The American Life League dares to tell the truth (with some of the most ridiculous cherry-picking of facts and fear-mongering you ever did see). Enjoy!

Whoever applied that guy's blush is my best friend.


Comments (40) RSS

Oldest First Unregistered On Registered On Add a comment
Sir Vic 1
"Hooking Kids on Sex"?
Next, they'll accuse Planned Parenthood of hooking the Chinese on rice.
Posted by Sir Vic on February 13, 2012 at 8:31 AM · Report this
devinderry 2
i want a fisting kit!
Posted by devinderry on February 13, 2012 at 8:34 AM · Report this
Um... aren't people hooked on sex to begin with? I was under the impression that hormones kinda dictate how much sex you want. Actually that is true and what these guys are saying is anti-science propaganda and no matter how much rational evidence you present them they'll continue to believe their narrow anti-logic points of view because they're idiots! There's my rant for the day.
Posted by Monday's too early for this sh*t on February 13, 2012 at 8:35 AM · Report this
Helix 4
I lol'd IRL.
Posted by Helix on February 13, 2012 at 8:36 AM · Report this
amyl 5
Jealous! I've been a Planned Parenthood patient for years and was never offered a penis lollipop. Some people have all the luck...
Posted by amyl on February 13, 2012 at 8:40 AM · Report this
"They are obsessed with sex!" Talk about the pot calling the kettle black.

I love how they claim that Planned Parenthood teaches kids about masturbation - 'cause you know they would never figure it out on their own.
Posted by Schweighsr on February 13, 2012 at 8:41 AM · Report this
This is fucking HILARIOUS until you realize it's serious.
Posted by Autumn on February 13, 2012 at 8:43 AM · Report this
Thanks a lot. Now I want a macaroon.
Posted by doceb on February 13, 2012 at 9:01 AM · Report this
"Once they get to high school--you know, right about the time they hit puberty..."

Posted by og on February 13, 2012 at 9:06 AM · Report this
The Max 10
So many layers of absolute wrong. It's a wrongapalooza, just a few wrongs short of a wrongpocolypse.
Posted by The Max on February 13, 2012 at 9:12 AM · Report this
Original Andrew 11
Because if we don't tell teenagers about S-E-X, then they'll never wanna stick it in. Simple, right?
Posted by Original Andrew on February 13, 2012 at 9:21 AM · Report this
Fifty-Two-Eighty 12
Yep. Nobody ever had sex before Planned Parenthood came along.
Posted by Fifty-Two-Eighty on February 13, 2012 at 9:23 AM · Report this
MacCrocodile 13
What is this "sex" you guys keep talking about? I think I should try it. With reckless abandon, if possible.
Posted by MacCrocodile on February 13, 2012 at 9:24 AM · Report this
Urgutha Forka 14
Kinda like getting kids hooked on fear of sin and hell in order to sell them religion.
Posted by Urgutha Forka on February 13, 2012 at 9:39 AM · Report this
Never would I have expected American Life League to put something on YouTube that was NSFW!!!
Posted by Bean on February 13, 2012 at 10:02 AM · Report this
Man, I missed out during my high school years in the 80s. All we got was a cartoon where Captain Condom defeats heinous villians like Sy Phillis and Gonny Rhea.

Of course, my 12th grade health teacher did bring in a dildo to show us how to put a condom on. Granted, half the girls in the class had babies by then, and could have used that informtion a lot sooner.
Posted by Sheryl on February 13, 2012 at 10:13 AM · Report this
Reverse Polarity 17
Wow. I wish my sex ed classes were half as fun as the classes Planned Parenthood has.
Posted by Reverse Polarity on February 13, 2012 at 10:29 AM · Report this
I've always loved conspiracy theories and the people who concoct them. Especially when the results are as hilarious as this routine. He should be doing stand-up.
Posted by Calpete on February 13, 2012 at 10:34 AM · Report this
WTF America? ? ?
He should have a look at the website of the dutch organisation for sexual health, I'm not even sure I'm allowed to link to it here, ah well, don't get lulled into a falls sense of that's not that bad by the cheesy 60's look of the website, the organisation is also a relic of the 60's which includes a very graphic assortment of pictures: (nsfw)
Posted by dutchie on February 13, 2012 at 10:53 AM · Report this
It's true! I never even thought of sex or masturbated until I stole a free condom from a PP outreach kiosk when I was fourteen. And it's been downhill ever since. My life has been one crazy sex binge after another. I even got married to fulfill my addiction. Sigh. The first one is always free.
Posted by tkc on February 13, 2012 at 11:51 AM · Report this
"vagina fruit roll u--" :35 seconds in. That's as much as I could take, surprised it was that much.
Posted by LMcGuff on February 13, 2012 at 12:05 PM · Report this
I'd never heard of sex or masturbation until an under cover Planned Parenthood worker pulled me into an alley and stuck a pussy pop in my mouth. Suddenly I was overcome with sexual desire. I still haven't recovered. I'm just glad it was a pussy pop not a penis pop. It would be a shame if they'd made me a gay sexoholic instead of a straight sexoholic. At least I can get married if I want.
Posted by Root on February 13, 2012 at 12:27 PM · Report this
sugar2s 23
Initially I read that as "This American Life dares to tell the truth" and had a few moments of TOTAL AND COMPLETE CONFUSION as I started watching the video. Sigh.
Posted by sugar2s on February 13, 2012 at 12:35 PM · Report this
Geni 24
That commercial really made me want to go out and find some hot, nasty, raunchy SECKS.
Posted by Geni on February 13, 2012 at 12:56 PM · Report this
Geni 25
It really makes me wonder if they truly think that not talking about sex or teaching kids about sex will mean the kids never think about it, never feel sexual desire, or worst of all (apparently, according to the video), sexual PLEASURE! Omigod, Planned Parenthood teaches teenagers about the existence of orgasms and the location of the clitoris! The horror, the horror!
Posted by Geni on February 13, 2012 at 1:05 PM · Report this
Sandiai 26
That was HOT.
Posted by Sandiai on February 13, 2012 at 5:25 PM · Report this
Simone 27
This can't be for real? This has to by some sort of comedy/parody.

I am getting a very nasty sweet tooth after hearing and seeing all of those sex shaped sweets and cakes and other goodies.
Posted by Simone on February 13, 2012 at 5:30 PM · Report this
Sandiai 28
That was HOT.

Oh, and yer whole argument falls apart, pretty boy, because PP is non-profit.
Posted by Sandiai on February 13, 2012 at 5:34 PM · Report this
Sandiai 29
Gaah! Jinks!
Posted by Sandiai on February 13, 2012 at 5:35 PM · Report this
I'm pretty sure I was a sex addict before Planned Parenthood ever existed.

sgt_doom, League of Dirty Old Men (est. 1864)
Posted by sgt_doom on February 13, 2012 at 5:43 PM · Report this
Is that guy wearing a cami under that lavender blouse?
Posted by midwaypete on February 13, 2012 at 7:11 PM · Report this
How come on the gay kinds get fisting kits?!?!!!??? WAAA!!!! That's not fair!

Also, I must say the young gay guy does look like he's with someone a wee bit older. Sheesh! Is this PP or NAMBL?
Posted by Papayas on February 13, 2012 at 8:46 PM · Report this
venomlash 33
I was never much interested in genital cupcakes or lollipops. The idea of eating something made to look like a dong just bothers me a bit, as a straight dude. And vulva cupcakes, well...well, let's just say I like to try and get inside my GF's head during sex, and the idea of using the pointy parts of my mouth on lady parts just makes me cringe.
Man, and my sex ed classes weren't fun like that. We spent 53 minutes a day in a 4th-floor classroom desperately trying to avert our eyes from the large photographs of STD-stricken genitalia that covered most of the walls. Frankly, that's how sex ed should be; teach everyone how to be safe, and put the fear of God into them about STDs.
Posted by venomlash on February 13, 2012 at 10:31 PM · Report this
This can't be real!
Posted by fotoeve on February 14, 2012 at 2:42 AM · Report this
I'd love this awesome group of REALISTIC folks to help me speak to someone who posted this (a HS friend) on his wall, saying HE BELIEVED this. He told me he checked the PP site and it was "accurate." I am so speechless, but must speak to it. This was his response to my note (which said the video was bull): "While the conclusion of the film may be debatable, the information regarding the PP website is accurate. I think the real issue here comes down to the government's use of tax dollars to indoctrinate/educate children with ideas which are not widely held by the taxpayer. It is not government's place to teach sexuality." Oh my god, help me. I would just unfriend him...but then I thought he'd never see another side...oh it makes me so angry! PP has helped me so much. I just wish my doc would perform my annual with that penis costume on.
Posted by seanyc on February 15, 2012 at 6:08 AM · Report this
hey, I've been to planned parenthood loads of times and I've never ever gotten a free fisting kit. wth?
Posted by miehana on February 15, 2012 at 3:20 PM · Report this
I like how he particularly highlights that 1 in 4 women have an STD but makes no mention of men.
Posted by ccd on February 15, 2012 at 8:29 PM · Report this
Ah yes the cycle of how birth control causes abortion. Makes perfect sense. Not.
Posted by Shhshhshhshhshh on February 15, 2012 at 9:20 PM · Report this
I want a free vibrator. Does that idiot not know that the tests and birth control are FREE.
Posted by tiffanydisaster on February 16, 2012 at 10:13 AM · Report this
@tiffany, depends on your state. the affiliate i volunteer with can't afford to provide those services for free anymore :(
Posted by lol sensitive on February 19, 2012 at 3:39 PM · Report this

Add a comment


Want great deals and a chance to win tickets to the best shows in Seattle? Join The Stranger Presents email list!

All contents © Index Newspapers, LLC
1535 11th Ave (Third Floor), Seattle, WA 98122
Contact | Privacy Policy | Terms of Use | Takedown Policy