Slog

News & Arts

Line Out

Music & the City
at Night

« Lunchtime Quickie: TGIF! And Rememb… | Well, if the Chinese Version of Twi… »

Friday, February 10, 2012

Film A Film for Now: Dear Zachary: A Letter to a Son About His Father

Posted by David Schmader on Fri, Feb 10, 2012 at 12:38 PM

scaled.File_DearZacharyTheatricalPoster-1.jpeg

The unbelievably horrible Powell tragedy keeps reminding me of another horrible instance of parental visitation/custody rights gone tragically wrong, documented in the amazing 2008 film Dear Zachary: A Letter to a Son About His Father. The Netflix synopsis does a graceful job of explaining the basics:

Filmmaker Kurt Kuenne's poignant tribute to his murdered childhood friend, Andrew Bagby, tells the story of a child custody battle between the baby's grieving grandparents and Shirley Turner, Bagby's pregnant ex-girlfriend and suspected killer. Initially, Kuenne made this documentary as a memorial for Andrew's loved ones, but it morphs into an emotional legal odyssey when Turner goes free on bail and is allowed to raise her son.

Dear Zachary is a movie that will destroy you, which is as it should be. But beyond the destruction is the beauty of the creation, with filmmaker/surviving friend Kuenne getting brilliantly proactive in response to a question that's sure to be hovering around the Powell family: How do we keep this horrible tragedy from becoming the entire life story of people we love?

Watch Dear Zachary at your leisure on Netflix Streaming. (And bring Kleenex/a dog to hug.)

Comments (18) RSS

Oldest First Unregistered On Registered On Add a comment

I wish I had never watched this film. It destroyed a part of my soul. My daughter is almost two. This film kept me awake for days. Do not watch it.

Posted by TVDinner

on February 10, 2012 at 12:49 PM

Dear Zachary destroyed me. I don't know if I'll ever be able to watch it again. Just seeing the title of this post made me a little sick to my stomach. That's how hard this film broke me.

Posted by moosefan on February 10, 2012 at 1:06 PM

@2 Agreed, my stomach did a little flip of uncomfortableness. It is an amazing documentary though, as heart rendering as it is, it is amazingly worth seeing. I remember just bawling my eyes out while I watched it.

Posted by Zog in PDX on February 10, 2012 at 1:10 PM

@3, oh it's absolutely worth seeing. It's so well done, so evocative. Which is why the idea of watching it again is so distressing to me. I just can't.

Posted by moosefan on February 10, 2012 at 1:22 PM

4: I don't know if I can either. But I'm definitely glad I saw it once.

Posted by David Schmader on February 10, 2012 at 1:25 PM

I am beginning to tear up right now as I remember watching Dear Zachary. Utterly horrifying and it just leaves you there...forever.

Posted by CommonKnowledge on February 10, 2012 at 1:33 PM

YES! I was not at all prepared for that movie. Interestingly, I was just thinking about it the other day: I couldn't remember the title, but then I realized I neither wished to ever watch it again nor recommend it to anyone because it was so heartwrenching. I was destroyed by even attempting to imagine what those poor parents went through, and I watched it before I had my own son. Now, I hug my 15-month-old and weep.

Posted by Fangdoc on February 10, 2012 at 2:05 PM

+1 parent with a young child who couldn't sleep after watching that movie.

Posted by Greenwood on February 10, 2012 at 2:17 PM

i've got no kids, but plenty of empathy, which means that watching this movie once was just enough. i absolutely don't regret it, but would probably not want to watch it again.

Posted by alithea on February 10, 2012 at 2:19 PM

You're all freaking me out. I have a 3 year old kid and I haven't even been able to read the headlines about the Powell thing without a suffocating feeling. No fucking way am I going to watch that movie.

Posted by Gurldoggie

on February 10, 2012 at 2:21 PM

Yes yes yes. Oh wow, I was just thinking about this the other day. The Powell case reminds me so much of the Bagby/Turner case that I hope someone can get the Bagbys (who are just the most beautiful, amazing people) and the Coxes in touch, in some sort of mutually beneficial moral support situation.

And yes, that documentary ripped out my heart - I was completely destroyed for a couple of days after. It's actually kind of a shame the subject matter is so unbearable that I never want to watch it again, because it was a brilliantly done film.

Posted by JenV on February 10, 2012 at 2:27 PM

I fully admit it: Watching this film reduced me to a sobbing mess of a human being, and I don't even like kids. In fact, I'd be scared if I met someone who could watch Dear Zachary and not lose their shit.

Posted by Jason Josephes

on February 10, 2012 at 2:27 PM

10: You are forbidden from watching this film. Watch Romy & Michele!

Posted by David Schmader on February 10, 2012 at 2:49 PM

OK, so the judge didn't think she was "dangerous" but how was she not a flight risk? She already fled one country once to avoid the consequences of her (alleged) actions. Does the movie explain that at all?

Posted by keshmeshi on February 10, 2012 at 3:28 PM

I also found myself trying to describe this movie to friends yesterday--and the whole awful thing came back to me (I happened to stumble on the beginning of it while channel surfing late one night--I had no idea what I was in for)...the part that struck me the most might have been the incredible humanity of the Bagby parents/grandparents. The existence of people that wonderful is almost as overwhelming to witness as the sickening, horrible story.

Posted by Gretli on February 10, 2012 at 4:27 PM

When I heard the news flash about Powell, "Dear Zachary" was the very first thing I thought of.

This movie will fuck you up.

Posted by Westside forever on February 10, 2012 at 4:29 PM

I remember that movie fucking with my head really bad. But more than that, I remember the "Pumpkins! Pumpkin pumpkin pumpkin. Dancing pumpkins!"

Damn she was bat shit crazy, but at least there was a good chuckle to be had for a minute, I mean, before she drowned and killed that poor kid who should have never been around her.

Posted by boogens on February 10, 2012 at 5:03 PM

One of the most devastating documentaries I've ever seen, because I had no idea what it was about. A friend told me to watch it and I went into it without reading the description. The horror I felt as the movie unfolded, just awful. I too can never watch it again.

Posted by sisyphusgal on February 10, 2012 at 8:27 PM