Slog

News & Arts

Line Out

Music & the City
at Night

« On President Obama and SuperPACs | There Is Blood »

Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Mailbag Dept. of Unfortunately Timed Promotional Product Deliveries

Posted by Dominic Holden on Tue, Feb 7, 2012 at 11:35 AM

The labels, which must have been printed more than a week ago, say: "FUZE is proud to donate $325,000 to Susan G. Komen for the Cure."

Also: tastes like snozberries.

FacebookShare

Comments (17) RSS

Oldest First Unregistered On Registered On Add a comment

I assume you will refuze to drink them.

Posted by yelahneb

on February 7, 2012 at 11:39 AM

Who ever heard of a snozberry??

Posted by Jerry P. on February 7, 2012 at 11:40 AM

So do we still write "Now with 170,000 fewer breast exams!" on these?

Posted by How angry should I still be? on February 7, 2012 at 11:47 AM

Regardless of Komen's weird politics, I've always had a problem with their fundraising model -- in exchange for allowing companies to put a pink ribbon on the label of their product, that company agrees to filter a penny or two through from the purchase, which then filters through Komen's administrative overhead, which then goes to another organization and filters through their administrative overhead, which then is spent on the thing you support. It seems like a very cheap form of feel-good PR for the participating companies, but a remarkably inefficient method for distributing funds for everybody else.

I'm glad the recent controversy has convinced people to make their check directly to Planned Parenthood if that's what they support. If for no other reason, it makes the money go a lot further.

Posted by Proteus on February 7, 2012 at 11:49 AM

If they're offering you physicals before and after, it's a clinical trial not a beverage.

"Coca-Cola's Fuze Beverage Makes False Claims of Reducing Risk of Cancer, Heart Disease, Flu, Kidney Infection, More".

Posted by bedipped on February 7, 2012 at 11:49 AM

Fuze is gross. I couldn't drink it, and even my dog wouldn't finish it for me.

Posted by Stiny on February 7, 2012 at 11:53 AM

I've never even tried it; the packaging looks suspect. I imagine the contents to be sugary, artificially flavored goop.

Posted by keshmeshi on February 7, 2012 at 11:58 AM

When something like this Komen kerfuffle happens, companies can get stuck with a lot of crap they can't sell. So they give it away. I'll bet some cases of this Thunder Muscle are going to end up at area food banks as well.

Something about the shape of the bottles and the color just under the cap is saying "barbecue sauce" to me. Blech.

Posted by Fnarf

on February 7, 2012 at 12:03 PM

BAD SANITATION! Caution to proceed with beverage.

Posted by gloomy gus on February 7, 2012 at 12:10 PM

Wait, are we still pissed at Komen? I mean, they turned the ship around and reversed course. People make mistakes. They owned this one and fixed it. Amirite?

Posted by soundslikepuget on February 7, 2012 at 12:13 PM

I'd tell you to just mail them to Karen Handel but the RESIGNED! I love it when conservatives have their careers burned to the ground for being total testicles!

I still think you should mail them back to Komen in one form or another though.

Posted by LukeJoe on February 7, 2012 at 12:13 PM

snozzberries? Who ever heard of a snozzberry?

Posted by mollman on February 7, 2012 at 12:59 PM

@4: "which then is spent on the thing you support."

I believe you mean "which is spent on marketing for Komen, aka "raising awareness".

Then a small percentage of that is spent on the thing you support.

Posted by undead ayn rand on February 7, 2012 at 1:11 PM

@10: "they turned the ship around and reversed course"

Uh, no they fucking didn't. You haven't been paying attention.

Posted by undead ayn rand on February 7, 2012 at 1:12 PM

@12 We are the music makers and we are the dreamers of dreams.

Posted by knobtheunicorn on February 7, 2012 at 1:15 PM

Just to be more polite @10, they stated the same policy in a different way, and the media called it a "reversal". They never stated that they would cut off existing grants, and they said that all grants currently assigned would continue to be assigned to PP. Essentially the media called all the PR spin and smoke blown up its ass a "victory", which it wasn't.

Even Handel leaving (on her own, not forced out) changes nothing about the operation of this organization.

Posted by undead ayn rand on February 7, 2012 at 1:24 PM