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Monday, February 6, 2012

Harrison Ford Offers to Punch You Right in the Face

Posted by on Mon, Feb 6, 2012 at 2:22 PM

That's basically what this is saying, right?

Harrison Ford is lining up to make a surprise return to the role of Rick Deckard in Ridley Scott's Blade Runner sequel, Twitchfilm reports. Ford is apparently in early talks to return as the replicant nemesis in Scott's forthcoming followup to his 1982 sci-fi classic.

They're going to keep making these shit sequels and prequels as long as you keep shelling out money for them, folks.

(Thanks a lot, Slog tipper Ben.)


Comments (39) RSS

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Fnarf 1
Harrison Ford is freakin' seventy years old. If he punched you in the face his ulna would shatter into a million pieces. Can a replicant wear a replacement hip?

Now would be a good time to drop a nuclear bomb on Ridley Scott.
Posted by Fnarf on February 6, 2012 at 2:32 PM · Report this
If this were Michael Bay or something you might have a point. This is Ridley Scott, sir. He can do what the fuck he wants with the possible payoff so great. Get a grip.
Posted by gloomy gus on February 6, 2012 at 2:36 PM · Report this
Posted by SweetDarkLord on February 6, 2012 at 2:36 PM · Report this
Fifty-Two-Eighty 4
I'll watch it. Fuck you, shitface.
Posted by Fifty-Two-Eighty on February 6, 2012 at 2:37 PM · Report this
very bad homo 5
I don't see these movies, but THEY STILL KEEP MAKING THEM! But Harrison Ford could make it work. He's still a badass.
Posted by very bad homo on February 6, 2012 at 2:39 PM · Report this
Blade Runner made me the nerd I am today. It's one of my top five films I've every seen. I have 3 versions of it on DVD and Blu-Ray. I'm totally shelling out money for the shit sequel.
Posted by PizmoSF on February 6, 2012 at 2:41 PM · Report this
Blade Runner is a gorgeous classic. in whichever cut you watch it. I'm having trouble imagining anyone, even Ridley Scott, doing anything to better it. I'd much rather it was just left alone, but if the reviews were decent, I'd be damned tempted to have a peek.
Posted by Brooklyn Reader on February 6, 2012 at 2:42 PM · Report this
I'd welcome a Harrison Ford cameo - as Deckard or not - so long as it's just a grace note and extraneous to the plot. I'd be pretty suspicious of Ford with a big part.

On the other hand, it would be hilarious if Ford created an optional spoof voiceover to the film, to perpetuate the long-running dispute about his voiceovers in Blade Runner.
Posted by Warren Terra on February 6, 2012 at 2:45 PM · Report this
OuterCow 9
Can't he just do another Jack Ryan movie or Air Force One 2? I miss having Harrison Ford as president.
Posted by OuterCow on February 6, 2012 at 2:48 PM · Report this
the new tron wasnt bad

but maybe that is the daft punk in me talking
Posted by Swearengen on February 6, 2012 at 2:50 PM · Report this
Now would be a good time to drop a nuclear bomb on Ridley Scott.

That's Michael Bay's next project. Starring Bruce Willis.
Posted by Mr. Happy Sunshine on February 6, 2012 at 2:52 PM · Report this
blip 12
As long as it's a sequel/prequel and not a remake I'm okay with this.
Posted by blip on February 6, 2012 at 2:53 PM · Report this
Andy 13
I dunno, I'm pretty excited for Prometheus, but it might suck. I will reserve judgment until I hear more.
Posted by Andy on February 6, 2012 at 2:54 PM · Report this
Gurldoggie 14
You read sequels, right? Mankell's first Wallender book was great so you went back for more, ditto the first Flashman book. You read The Hamlet, then The Town and then The Mansion, and maybe you even read all those Hobbit books. Why are movies so different? What makes you so sure this will suck?
Posted by Gurldoggie on February 6, 2012 at 3:03 PM · Report this
balderdash 15
I gave the Star Wars prequels a chance, to my chagrin. That wasn't what tore it, though. Indiana Jones 4 was the last time I will make the mistake of seeing one of these ill-advised latter-day sequels. I'd sooner just go ahead and cut my entire adolescence out of my brain with a scalpel than watch another go-round of old men pretending they're not creatively bankrupt.
Posted by balderdash on February 6, 2012 at 3:06 PM · Report this
Will in Seattle 16
@1 not really. He's basically a younger version of my dad, and my dad can still punch out people.

Bone density may decrease with age, but if you live on a tree farm and do manual work and carpentry a lot, you'll tend to have a lot less, especially if you decide to go (mostly) vegan in the French way.
Posted by Will in Seattle on February 6, 2012 at 3:06 PM · Report this
Fuck fuck fuckety fucking fuck. Leave near perfection alone and do something fucking original you fucking hacks.
Posted by Smartypants on February 6, 2012 at 3:09 PM · Report this
Why is the author of the post assuming that the latest Bladerunner movie will be a dud? At least wait for it to come out and be reviewed.
Posted by Patricia Kayden on February 6, 2012 at 3:11 PM · Report this
T 19
I'm at a point now where I rarely even get excited about movies anymore because of the constant stream of this kind of bullshit coming out these days. I'm not saying there aren't great films being made right now, but they seem to be few and far between especially where these kinds of blockbusters are concerned.
Posted by T on February 6, 2012 at 3:13 PM · Report this
As long as Lucas and Spielberg aren't involved I'll withhold judgement until it's released.
Posted by VIC_20 on February 6, 2012 at 3:17 PM · Report this
treacle 21
So, is this sequel going to delve into some of the other complex themes of "Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?" that Blade Runner ignored? Or is it going to spring entirely from R. Scott and his team of writers' minds and stay solely within the "Blade Runner" version of the universe?
Posted by treacle on February 6, 2012 at 3:23 PM · Report this
Will in Seattle 22
Also, the main question when someone offers to punch you in the face should always be this:

"How Drunk Am I?"

If you are:

a. Very Drunk - go for it.
b. Mostly Drunk - this will hurt in the morning.
c. Not Drunk - WTF?!?
Posted by Will in Seattle on February 6, 2012 at 3:23 PM · Report this
dwightmoodyforgetsthings 23
@18- Because it's a sequel to a story that was perfect already. It's like you're asking why, after eating until you're about to vomit, is it a bad idea to eat some more.
Posted by dwightmoodyforgetsthings on February 6, 2012 at 3:24 PM · Report this
Daddy Love 24
As long as Shia LeBeouf is in it too, I'm down.
Posted by Daddy Love on February 6, 2012 at 3:31 PM · Report this
At this point I want everything - comics, novel, movie, TV show - that had any merit pre-1995 destroyed with a sequel or prequel. Trash it all. BladeRunner Babies 2016!! Fuck yeah!

And MAYBE the dip shit fanboys stuck in perpetual adolescence that created this horrific trend will exhaust themselves in one giant dweeb-fit as each and every debacle financially ruins studio after studio... and we might then finally get something original for grown ups again.
Posted by tkc on February 6, 2012 at 3:45 PM · Report this
Amazingly, he's still getting work: IMDB says he has two movies coming out this year; both are period-piece action dramas with real actors and no big box office stars. I suppose he's going for redemption; I'd not mind if he were just going.
Posted by Warren Terra on February 6, 2012 at 4:04 PM · Report this
One of my favorite films, from it's first release. (Neither the voice over or happy ending was enuf to spoil it for me.)

So yeah, I'm afraid it will only be fucked over.

But at least it's not a remake, that's when they really screw the pooch.
Posted by judybrowni on February 6, 2012 at 4:16 PM · Report this
Kinison 28
Sorry, but Ridley Scott is not George Lucas, or Steven Spielberg. Depends on how good Prometheus is. Given that Ridley Scott hasnt done a sci-fi in decades, me thinks he'll have some good ideas, whereas Lucas/Spielberg have been doing scifi for a while and have long run out of ideas.
Posted by Kinison on February 6, 2012 at 4:18 PM · Report this
Joe Szilagyi 29
While we're on the topic of possible unrequired sequels of sci-fi classics, I would watch the shit out of a proper 3 film adaptation of the Zahn Thrawn Star Wars sequels. Who cares if they are set 5 years after Jedi? Just stretch out the time and give us a middle aged cast picking up their roles.

Sometimes, these things are OK.

Example #1: Did we need a prequel to The Thing? Of course not. It was a pointless cash-in using characters we saw for about 2 minutes.

Example #2: Do we need Ghostbusters 3? I would say so, since it's the original cast, crew, and writers picking up where they left off. Sometimes it's OK for these things to happen.

Example #3: Rumors I saw the past week that Gremlins 3 is in pre-development. Where the first one was a send up of holiday films, and the second of disaster films like Towering Inferno, this one will be war films if it happens. Militarized gremlins! I would pay $12 in a second to watch another funny Gremlins film, if it ended with a gremlin riding a nuke from the sky Dr. Strangelove style.
Posted by Joe Szilagyi on February 6, 2012 at 4:24 PM · Report this
yelahneb 30
My main nerdy beef with Harrison in a BR sequel would be if it takes place any more than a few years after 2019 - if Deckard was indeed a replicant, he should be dead by then. And not old looking, for that matter... so maybe he finds a way to beat the "built-in obsolescence" the replicants were given, and intentionally ages himself to fit in? God I'm so high right now
Posted by yelahneb on February 6, 2012 at 4:39 PM · Report this
Reverse Polarity 31
Yes, yes, most sequels suck. But not all of them. Ridley Scott has great talent, and Harrison Ford has tons of charisma even at his age. They could pull this off. I will reserve judgement.
Posted by Reverse Polarity on February 6, 2012 at 4:51 PM · Report this
It being a Harrison Ford film, he'll have to have a 25 year old wife and two 8 year old fraternal twins, so he can charge after the bad guys saying in his gravelly gruff choking voice "they took my kids...cough...sputter".
Posted by Supreme Ruler Of The Universe http://_ on February 6, 2012 at 4:53 PM · Report this
My 14-year-old self walked out of the Cinerama one summer day in 1982 after Blade Runner and for me the world was changed. Not before or since has a movie hit me like that so I'm willing to reserve judgment but we're messing with hallowed ground here so please, please don't screw it up! Any word on Vangelis doing the music again? That soundtrack is a big part of the BR magic.
Posted by organicmechanic on February 6, 2012 at 5:43 PM · Report this
Dr_Awesome 34
Man, I had to have the soundtrack so bad, I snuck a cassette tape recorder (kids: google it) in to a screening of it. Even flipped the tape over halfway through.
Posted by Dr_Awesome on February 6, 2012 at 5:53 PM · Report this
treacle 35
Harrison Ford is my father.
Posted by treacle on February 6, 2012 at 6:25 PM · Report this
bedipped 36
More Electric Sheep, Less Androids! If Daryl Hannah signs on, I'm there.
Posted by bedipped on February 6, 2012 at 7:20 PM · Report this
Knat 37
I wasn't aware that it was possible for "lining up" to take place with a single person. A line kind of implies multiple people, doesn't it? Otherwise, it's just a single guy standing around waiting.
Posted by Knat on February 6, 2012 at 7:42 PM · Report this
gicinema 38
why bother giving them pixels then?
Posted by gicinema on February 6, 2012 at 9:01 PM · Report this
It could be done. It could be done great if the right screenplay gets written to accommodate Harrison's ancient age. Don't get me wrong, I adore him, always have, no matter what age, but he is 30 years older and if he ever used sunscreen, it sure doesn't show on his face. He can still act. I'd love to see a sequel done so well it becomes a classic and gets Ford a well-deserved Oscar.

That said, I recently read an article about Hollywood and its unwillingness to do anything new and fresh--they just want to recycle old hits and crank out bad sequels. I'm not holding out much hope for a sequel to "Blade Runner" being any good. Sigh.
Posted by Bugnroolet on February 7, 2012 at 9:13 AM · Report this

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