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Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Crime Straight Couple Ruins the Sanctity of Extreme Star Trek: The Next Generation Obsession Through Divorce

Posted by Grant Brissey on Tue, Jan 31, 2012 at 3:36 PM

When Star Trek obsessive Tony Alleyne was separated from his wife, he embraced the chance to turn their old flat into a recreation of the inside of the Starship Enterprise. But the 58-year-old's painstaking efforts may have been for nothing. His ex-wife wants to sell up - and she intends to offer buyers a more conventional looking home.

Mr Alleyne has spent the last ten years transforming the one-bedroom property into a sci-fi fantasy, with a computerised flight deck, flashing lights and even 'transporters'.

He is devastated by the news that his ex-wife Georgina wants to sell the flat in Hinckley, Leicestershire, where he has been living by himself since their break-up.

What will happen if we continue to allow straight people to get married and then divorce? It's a slippery slope. Before you know it straight people will be getting divorced and engaging in bestiality, or worse! This aggression cannot stand. Who else's dreams will straight people ruin through divorce?

h/t: Clyde Peterson!

Comments (14) RSS

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Those pictures are amaze-balls.

Posted by gloomy gus on January 31, 2012 at 3:55 PM

I was wondering why he wouldn't just buy his wife's half of the flat, but felt bad for the guy - until I read that his wife has been paying the (presumably all of) mortgage on the place since they split IN 1994!!! 18 years!!! That's ballsy.

If he wants to keep his (incredibly groovy) flat, he should buy it from her as is.

Posted by genevieve on January 31, 2012 at 3:58 PM

Mrs Alleyne...has paid the mortgage since they split in 1994

Wow. I'd say he's had more than enough time to plan for this eventuality.

Posted by Knat on January 31, 2012 at 4:00 PM

Holy shit! What a cool apartment!

And your point about the slippery slope is a good one.

Posted by Sandiai on January 31, 2012 at 4:01 PM

I would be more impressed if it were an actually useful apartment, like if it was based on crew quarters rather than putting a pointless transporter in there. You could even incorporate flat-screen TVs and iPads to be somewhat functional mock-ups of the ship's computer.

Posted by keshmeshi on January 31, 2012 at 4:04 PM

I have a real problem with him using Picard's voice on the Voyagers deck

Posted by yumyum74 on January 31, 2012 at 4:28 PM

Do these people ALL live in the UK? Didn't the person who made their house into a Hobbit Shire-house live there?

Posted by disintegrator

on January 31, 2012 at 5:51 PM

I'm not even sure they HAVE marriage any more in the Federation. I think they might have done away with it, along with money and religion and all that other backwards-ass bullshit.

Posted by balderdash

on January 31, 2012 at 6:13 PM

@8 - They do still have marriage. Don't you remember the episode where Data had to give away the bride at the wedding of O'Brien and Keiko? I do. I'm going to go kill myself now (not really--I'm going to eat some Cheetos).

Posted by balki on January 31, 2012 at 6:48 PM

What's the point without matter-anti matter drive? Really people what is the point?

Posted by Cato the Younger Younger on January 31, 2012 at 6:51 PM

@9,

Also, Troi and Riker get married at the beginning of Star Trek: Nemesis. And Spock was supposed to get married (or was he already married? I can't remember) but his backstabbing bride made him fight Kirk instead. And Tuvok was married. I think B'elanna and Tom got married. Worf and Jadzia were married. And Worf wanted to marry his babymama, but she rebuffed him and died before she could change her mind.

Yes, I am a dork.

Posted by keshmeshi on January 31, 2012 at 6:58 PM

@11

You forgot to mention that ALL women (well, with the exception of Geordi's holodeck fantasy woman, Dr. Leah Brahms) were addressed as Mrs. [insert husband's last name] centuries from now.

::flashes dorkian credentials, too::

Posted by Helenka (also a Canuck) on January 31, 2012 at 7:30 PM

At least he didn't put in any of those godawful decorative plates from the Enterprise-D.

Posted by Greg on January 31, 2012 at 9:04 PM

@9, 11, 12

I stand entirely corrected. I do, in fact, remember O'Brien and Keiko's wedding now that you bring it up. Well spotted.

Nemesis is SO not canon, though. Not in my eyes. Fuck that movie with a pole. Almost as bad as the new Abrams monstrosity.

Posted by balderdash

on January 31, 2012 at 9:21 PM