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News & ArtsThursday, January 19, 2012
2012 / Politics / Sex Are You An Honest Swinger? Or Are You a Dishonest Swingrich?
Posted by Dan Savage on Thu, Jan 19, 2012 at 3:57 PM
A readers asks...
Dear Dan,
Please, please, please, please PUH-LEEEEESSSSEEEE can you santorum Newt? Thanks,
Mary
Um... I'm not going to santorum Newt. That's almost too awful to contemplate. But commemorating Newt's request for an open marriage by redefining his name or part of it? A commenter beat me to it:
A "swingrich" is a CPOS masquerading as a swinger/polyamorous person. "I thought he was ethically nonmonogamous but he was just a swingrich."
2
I fully support this definition.
And, oh man, what do we do with his first name? I say we make it some kind of disgusting lizard thing.
And, oh man, what do we do with his first name? I say we make it some kind of disgusting lizard thing.
3
I understand that many people feel strongly against cheating, but no one deserves to be called something as awful as "swingrich".
4
Beautiful! I just submitted it to Urban Dictionary, with appropriate credit given of course, under my pseudonym "sloggerette". Let's get this out there, people!
13
I swear I'm not a Swingrich, you can ask my partner he'll tell you he's fine with us hooking up. He might even want to join.
15
I'm Slog famous! Now my ego is the size of a largish weather balloon. This is well worth three, maybe even five second of my fifteen minutes.
16
@15 - Careful, don't get carried away. Before you know it, they'll have some tawdry picture of you drinking by the pool, showing off your pasty flab.
17
Now we need someone to rewrite the "Mr. Grinch" song yet again, with lyrics appropriate to "swingrich."
18
Ha ha ha, I can hear the priest now ' do you miss good christian woman take mr. family values man as you're husband? No good Christian woman would f--k a married man other than her husband. She's as much as a low life whore as Newt is!!! AND yes his 2nd wife was in the hospital when he served her with divorce papers. I hope like hell he doesn't have a prescription for viagra. Why hasn't anyone mentioned how Newt paid for the abortion of his unborn child with one of the women who became pregnant with his child when he was married to another? Another family value?
20
Newt = a person who believes that the poor have a duty to be self-supporting through hard work from early childhood, in order to avoid being a drain on the economy. Unlike the rich, who are entitled to drain the economy completely dry then still expect tax-breaks and bonuses.
21
Personally I thought planting a row of partisans to jump up when swingrich was calling ex-wife #2 a liar (at the CNN debate), and having all the swingrichites in the audience cheer, was great theater. So I suggest to crank up the abandonment meme, something that goes along "till death do us part, or at least major illness and a new mistress". That is something the paid partisans can't spin.
Peace.
Peace.
23
@20,
As opposed to Romney, who felt entitled to drain other people's pension funds, and destroy the companies they worked at.
Peace.
As opposed to Romney, who felt entitled to drain other people's pension funds, and destroy the companies they worked at.
Peace.
24
I don't believe that Newt asked for an "open marriage". He clearly stands for traditional adultery.
26
What is it to be santorumed? What is it to santorum someone? Can it be something you do to someone? Or just something that happens to you? I mean the definition I know but in verb form...I'm unsure.
Not that I want to take away attention away from Newt...
Newt, Newt, Newt, Newt!
Not that I want to take away attention away from Newt...
Newt, Newt, Newt, Newt!
27
@26 : I have a possible answer - to santorum someone is to penetrate someone while your unit is covered in santorum?
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