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Wednesday, January 18, 2012

I'm Guessing My Credit Cards Would Have Burned Longer

Posted by on Wed, Jan 18, 2012 at 12:54 PM

Jesus... how many more credulous headlines do I have to read about the Mt. Rainier snowshoer who kept himself warm by burning money: "$6 fire kept lost hiker going during Mount Rainier ordeal."

It's a somewhat amazing survival story and all that, but a "$6 fire" is what kept him going? Really? It wasn't even six ones, but rather a one and a five. What's that... ten seconds or so of warmth? I mean, a 66-year-old man is lost in a blizzard on the side of a mountain for two days—and survives—and all the headline writers can focus on is: Ohmigod... he burned money!

 

Comments (11) RSS

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Luisa 1
The best report, though, was that he burned toothpaste. . .
Posted by Luisa on January 18, 2012 at 1:11 PM · Report this
bedipped 2
Would you trade two days in the snow for all the work and consequences of your recent aquatic adventure?
Posted by bedipped on January 18, 2012 at 1:32 PM · Report this
Vince 3
Yes, but he burned it in his undies.
Posted by Vince on January 18, 2012 at 1:46 PM · Report this
Knat 4
He destroyed American legal tender?! That is a FEDERAL OFFENSE! Like opening another's mail! Lock him up and throw away the key!
Posted by Knat on January 18, 2012 at 2:10 PM · Report this
5
He should have burned Euro notes. They're losing value faster than you can light them.
Posted by Anastasia Beaverhausen on January 18, 2012 at 2:22 PM · Report this
Josh Bis 6
But how would they have compared to gold coins?
Posted by Josh Bis http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Author.html?oid=3815563 on January 18, 2012 at 3:15 PM · Report this
rob! 7
He should have had a few handfuls of these with him. Cheap, lightweight, and long-lasting. Could be a lifesaver. You only need a little warmth inside your boots or mittens or whatever to prevent frostbite—if extremities get too cold, the body constricts blood supply to conserve heat in the body core, even if it kills your fingers and toes.
Posted by rob! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QZBdUceCL5U on January 18, 2012 at 3:31 PM · Report this
Xenos 8
I bet Mitt Romney would sooner trudge into an icy lake and await death's merciful embrace than burn a single dollar of his lucre.
Posted by Xenos on January 18, 2012 at 3:32 PM · Report this
9
Reminds me of a great Jack London story.
To Build a Fire
http://www.jacklondons.net/buildafire.ht…
Posted by 60below on January 18, 2012 at 3:56 PM · Report this
10
Goldy, shut up.
Posted by pioneer on January 18, 2012 at 6:06 PM · Report this
Kitts 11
@8 I dunno, he sure burned a lot of it four years ago.
Posted by Kitts on January 18, 2012 at 9:14 PM · Report this

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