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Tuesday, January 17, 2012

News / Sex If Opposite-Sex Marriage is "Traditional Marriage"...

Posted by Dan Savage on Tue, Jan 17, 2012 at 9:48 AM

...then this would be traditional man-on-dog, right?

Comments (17) RSS

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In the mugshot, he looks like he knows he screwed the pooch.

Posted by Kurt618 on January 17, 2012 at 10:12 AM

Well thank goodness it was good old heterosexual man on female dog and not that disgusting man on male dog gay sex.

Cuz that would be wrong.

Posted by Smartypants on January 17, 2012 at 10:26 AM

see the comments on the story? everyone's all "har-dee-har-har" about it and nodody seems appalled. i know it's the south and all, but wtf?

Posted by mr. herriman on January 17, 2012 at 10:31 AM

Traditional? Not at all. That was a "mixed-breed dog." Miscegination! A traditional gentleman would insist on a purebred with AKC papers!

Posted by LML on January 17, 2012 at 10:32 AM

@3 - you have to admit there are some pretty funny lines in the comments:

- And the call it 'puppy love'.
- He's the pick of the litter...
- Are the police sure they collared the right guy?
- What would Scooby do?
- Ruh Ro!
- It might not have been a Dachshund, but it was a wiener dog that day!
- You know he's just going to get a slap on the paw.
- Gives a whole new meaning to 'dog day afternoon'.
- Come get your Milk-Bone!
- It was a Mal-tease.
- You had me at woof!
- Did you see the collar that bitch was wearing? She was asking for it!
- That's one sick puppy.

And my personal favorite...
"Knick knack paddy whack"

Posted by Smartypants on January 17, 2012 at 10:55 AM

In my opinion, the most distasteful part of this episode is that the dog was under 18 years of age.

Posted by Clayton on January 17, 2012 at 11:29 AM

Having sex with an animal is a felony??

Posted by Dingo on January 17, 2012 at 11:31 AM

Reminds me of your "so... is it a girl horse or a boy horse?" "...(deep breath) I am NOT a /homosexual/." story, Dan.

Posted by UtterEast on January 17, 2012 at 11:41 AM

Apparently they have rape kits for dogs.

Posted by sirkowski

on January 17, 2012 at 11:59 AM

If it was "felony crime against nature," does that mean it is out of the jurisdiction of local/county/state court system? If it was a crime against nature, then should Nature be the one to press charges and hear the case?

Posted by TechBear on January 17, 2012 at 12:21 PM

In your joking around, remember that in Charlotte, it was a felony crime against nature to suck dick until the Supreme Court ruled on that Texas case - less that 10 years agO!!!!

Posted by BrotherBob on January 17, 2012 at 1:05 PM

"Natural Marriage" is now the descriptor preferred by the Hate Groups. That Dog lovin Hetero man did not get the memo.

Posted by Sargon Bighorn on January 17, 2012 at 1:45 PM

Oh my. ""Recovered a DNA sample."

Yikes.

Posted by Learned Hand on January 17, 2012 at 1:56 PM

In case a bazillion others haven't already sent this one, Dan, I think it needs a post all by itself:

http://thenewcivilrightsmovement.com/gay…

Posted by theseamster on January 17, 2012 at 3:47 PM

@7 - Only if you're a selfish prick and didn't give the animal an orgasm.

Posted by theseamster on January 17, 2012 at 3:49 PM

#8 Iknowright? That was like. The best.

Posted by firedryer on January 18, 2012 at 12:08 AM

@7: And eating them not, nor storing them immobile in large warehouses living in their own shit and having their intestines vacuumed to prevent ruptures from the food-intolerance-induced bloating, nor having their claws and beaks sliced off in infancy, etc. Anyone who argues that laws about zoophilia are about ethical treatment of animals and eats factory-farmed meat is a big hypocrite. They're really all about "Eww! Icky sex! Lock up the perverts!" Even if I think fucking non-human animals is pretty weird, it's definitely not felony material, in the context of what we ARE allowed to do to animals.

@8: Hehe, that's a good story.

Posted by John Horstman on January 18, 2012 at 1:08 PM