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News & ArtsFriday, December 23, 2011
Life What's Your Birthday Wish for Tim Eyman?
Posted by Eli Sanders on Fri, Dec 23, 2011 at 6:00 AM
- Really? Only 46?
How could we have forgotten that yesterday was initiative peddler Tim Eyman's 46th birthday???
Please leave your belated birthday wishes in the comments. And in the jump, please find Eyman's birthday card to himself (and his Christmas card to the media).
Thursday, December 22nd, 2011
To: Reporters, columnists, editorial writers and other members of the media
From: Tim Eyman
First of all and most importantly, I wish you and your families a very Merry Christmas & Happy New Year:
Today is my 46th birthday. I celebrated it by doing something I really love — I went with my family to the movies (Mission Impossible — wow, what a great action flick). As you can see by our Christmas card this year, I am very, very lucky.
It is a genuine honor and my greatest joy to work with all of you in the press. I'm very proud of our past 15 years of activism and appreciate very much working with all of you to tell our story to the electorate. I look forward to working with you in 2012 and beyond.
Again, my best to you and your family this holiday season.
Sincerely,
Tim Eyman
4
happy 6th birthday, tim. i'm assuming you are really turning 6 - as that better explains the asinine policies you promote - immaturity and selfishness are hallmarks of out of control 6 year olds. and because it would take a major douche to sh*t all over the poor and working class in this great state as much as you have. you're not a major douche, are you tim?
7
I wish him a kidney stone with no pain meds available, and a year's subscription to Mother Jones and The Nation in the hopes that SOMETHING progressive might sink into his immature and petty little noggin.
10
I wish for him humility so that he does not inherently know what is best for the people of Washington. I wish for him enlightenment so that he realizes that many of the things for which he has advocated have been actually harmful. And I wish for him a raging case of crabs.
11
" he does not inherently know what is best for the people of Washington. "
Then how come the people voted 2/3 in favor of I1053
Keep up the anger and delusion that WA state and King county are havens for the loony left.
Then how come the people voted 2/3 in favor of I1053
Keep up the anger and delusion that WA state and King county are havens for the loony left.
15
I wish that he would win elective office - one that has to figure out a budget hamstringed by poorly thought-out initiatives.
18
A copy of the state constitution might make a nice gift to him.
And a birthday 3 days before Christmas. Huh. no wonder he's such an angry young man.
And a birthday 3 days before Christmas. Huh. no wonder he's such an angry young man.
19
@16: Know what else is funny? Children without health insurance because the state cut their benefits. People malnourished because they don't qualify for food stamps. Workers in mental hospitals getting assaulted by the patients there aren't enough employees to supervise.
I could go on, but I'm laughing too hard. Ha. Ha.
I could go on, but I'm laughing too hard. Ha. Ha.
24
Tim, for your birthday I shall pass an initiative forbidding you to push any more initiatives on Wa voters. Happy fucking birthday.
27
@20, how do you know the people rioting were over Jordans were poor? Poor enough to be effected by cuts to government programs?
Maybe nuveau-middle-class, quite possibly living above their means, but not poor!
Maybe nuveau-middle-class, quite possibly living above their means, but not poor!
28
@27 racial stereotyping
He's thinking: southcenter mall+buying air jordans+rioting=black=poor
His argument holds up, as long as you don't apply reason.
He's thinking: southcenter mall+buying air jordans+rioting=black=poor
His argument holds up, as long as you don't apply reason.
30
"As you can see by our Christmas card this year, I am very, very lucky" - wonder what he's referring to here, anyone know?
33
Thank the Flying Spaghetti Monster that 31's comment was pulled. That comment talked about logic, yet was highly illogical!
34
I was going to say a wrecked car and DUI, so he can start 2012 as a bus rider, but I'm sure Mrs. Eyman would suck it up and just drive him everywhere.
That leaves my second wish: painful sores on his balls and anus.
That leaves my second wish: painful sores on his balls and anus.
36
@29:
What do you have against New Hampshire?
Better he should find the sort of taxless, governmentless state he seeks, by relocating to Somalia.
What do you have against New Hampshire?
Better he should find the sort of taxless, governmentless state he seeks, by relocating to Somalia.
40
Here's what a slimebucket calling itself "Baby Mama" said @37:
Oh, and it shows your racism too.
@36 ahhh the Somalia meme. Funny, I was just in Walla Walla and didn't see roving hoards of Somali gangs in technicals. Maybe I should go down to rainier and MLK?I know I shouldn't feed the trolls, but still... Last I checked, Walla Walla isn't in Somalia. Nor is the intersection of Rainier & MLK. So your attempt at snark/insult just demonstrates your own inadequacies.
Oh, and it shows your racism too.
44
#34 How about DUI, a wrecked car, and a divorce?
Or, how about this -- he could be the only person injured in one of those incidents where a person who is really too old to be driving safely, but keeps on doing it anyway because we have such a car-dependent society, randomly plows into a shopping mall.
Then they interview the driver afterward and it turns out he used to have a convenient bus he could take into town, but it was cut due to budget shortfalls.
Suddenly the iconic image of Tim Eyman in a wheelchair for the rest of his life becomes a rallying point for restoring and improving public transportation in this country.
And Eyman, who never learned a thing, gets to weep at seeing his image appropriated for the purposes of people who despise everything he stands for.
Or, how about this -- he could be the only person injured in one of those incidents where a person who is really too old to be driving safely, but keeps on doing it anyway because we have such a car-dependent society, randomly plows into a shopping mall.
Then they interview the driver afterward and it turns out he used to have a convenient bus he could take into town, but it was cut due to budget shortfalls.
Suddenly the iconic image of Tim Eyman in a wheelchair for the rest of his life becomes a rallying point for restoring and improving public transportation in this country.
And Eyman, who never learned a thing, gets to weep at seeing his image appropriated for the purposes of people who despise everything he stands for.
46
May a TV news crew discover him in possession of a crack pipe while in the company of an underage prostitute.
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