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Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Evangelical Asks Newt Gingrich to Address Marital Infidelities

Posted by on Wed, Nov 30, 2011 at 11:01 AM

Evangelical Christian Richard Land posted an open letter to Newt Gingrich yesterday:

Mr. Speaker, I urge you to pick a pro-family venue* and give a speech (not an interview) addressing your martial history once and for all. It should be clear that this speech will be “it” and will not be repeated, only referenced.

As you prepare that speech, you should picture in your mind a 40-something Evangelical married woman whose 40-something sister just had her heart broken by an Evangelical husband who has just filed for divorce, having previously promised in church, before God, his wife and “these assembled witnesses” to “love, honor and cherish until death us do part.”

Focus on her as if she were your only audience...You need to make it as clear as you possibly can that you deeply regret your past actions and that you do understand the anguish and suffering they caused others including your former spouses. Make it as clear as you can that you have apologized for the hurt your actions caused and that you have learned from your past misdeeds. Express your love for, and loyalty to, your wife and your commitment to your marriage. Promise your fellow Americans that if they are generous enough to trust you with the presidency, you will not let them down and that there will be no moral scandals in a Gingrich White House.

Part of me would love to see this, just because it would physically pain Newt Gingrich to grovel, and that pain would be written all over his enormous face. I don't believe Gingrich will do this—he thinks he's onto something with his stock "it's-none-of-your-business" response—but Evangelicals believe that everything sexual is their business, and they won't be happy until he humiliates himself in public and begs for forgiveness. I could watch this dance forever.

* What's an anti-family venue? Was Dick Land seriously worried Gingrich was going to give this hypothetical speech from the floor of a gay bathhouse?

 

Comments (14) RSS

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ryanayr 1
As to the asterisk: I would love to see Gingrich grovel with pain written all over his face at Club Z.
Posted by ryanayr on November 30, 2011 at 11:14 AM · Report this
Allyn 2
* I think Dick Land, while maybe not a "pro-family venue", would be the best place for Newt to make his speech.

I'm picturing a phallic-shaped parachute ride. And the teacup ride would involve tea-bagging. The carousel would be the best ride EVER...
Posted by Allyn on November 30, 2011 at 11:15 AM · Report this
venomlash 3
Newt Gingrich has a martial history? What wars did he fight in?
Posted by venomlash on November 30, 2011 at 11:18 AM · Report this
4
Hahaha; the guy specifically asks for a speech, not an interview. He is literally asking Gingrich to paint the most compelling fiction that he can and then be done with it, and not risk letting the truth of the situation get in the way of an attractive lie.
Posted by Ruke on November 30, 2011 at 11:21 AM · Report this
5
Dick Land! Fun for the whole family! Ride 'till you puke! Priceless.
Posted by throxus on November 30, 2011 at 11:24 AM · Report this
Allyn 6
@4 - yep. People who want the truth want an interview. People who want a story, a narrative, ask for a speech.
Posted by Allyn on November 30, 2011 at 11:31 AM · Report this
The Max 7
Any ECC worth his salt knows all he needs to know about the Gingrich. He's the sort of man who'll cheat on his wife and squander his political capital in pursuit of impeaching a president for cheating on his wife. He's the sort of man who'll say one thing and do the opposite.

Personally, I could care less who what when or where the Gingrich sticks his obviously short but thick bright red fully circumsized tallywhacker into. But that level of hypocrisy puts him well beyond the low moral standard I require for an officeholder.

And the ECCs are supposed to have big problems with the whole adultery thing in the first place. At least they did back in 1998.
Posted by The Max on November 30, 2011 at 12:18 PM · Report this
kim in portland 8
My guess is they are looking for a response from Gingrich that will allow them to endorse him with a clear conscience. They want him to give a narrative on how he feels convicted of the sin of adultry, that he has repented of his sins, and that he has been given the grace to not falter again. They want a confession and a testimony of how Jesus changed his heart, so they can jump behind him and use their pulpits to inspire voters. My guess is they are disappointed with Perry and have doubts about Romney because he's Mormon.

I agree with Allyn, they don't want the truth, they want an apologetic that will make it okay to endorse him.
Posted by kim in portland http://www.oregonlive.com/portland/index.ssf/2010/11/fast-paced_video_provides_a_fu.html on November 30, 2011 at 12:43 PM · Report this
9
Leaving your wife for your 23-years-younger-than-you staffer is a shitty thing to do and I don't blame evangelicals for thinking that. Newt's discussion of this has been, let's say, inadequate: "There's no question at times in my life, partially driven by how passionately I felt about this country, that I worked too hard and things happened in my life that were not appropriate." If I were thinking about voting for him - and I can't imagine what could possibly happen in order to make that the case - I'd want to know about this, too.
Posted by stats on November 30, 2011 at 12:45 PM · Report this
undead ayn rand 10
@4: "literally asking Gingrich to paint the most compelling fiction that he can and then be done with it"

Would you expect any less from an evangelical? It doesn't matter how Gingrich has lived his life, as long as he's a compelling storyteller. It's the born again part that really gets these people rock-hard, not how they've lived their lives pre and post-Jesus.
Posted by undead ayn rand on November 30, 2011 at 12:51 PM · Report this
undead ayn rand 11
"I don't blame evangelicals for thinking that"

You should blame them because they're only doing this to to handwave his "sins" away simply and easily, turning off their consciences as he did his. They don't sincerely care about electing a multiple-adulterer, and would rather elect him over a family man like Obama.
Posted by undead ayn rand on November 30, 2011 at 12:56 PM · Report this
12
One reason my wife and I only ever see movies at the Cinebarre anymore is because serving booze legally requires them to be anti-family.
Posted by Ben on November 30, 2011 at 1:10 PM · Report this
13
If an apology must be made, why should Newt be the only one to apologize to evangelical women voters? Newt lived and slept with his present wife Callista while he was still married to his second wife Marianne. (NY Daily News - Aug 12, 1999). Was this adulterous cohabitation non-consensual?

More likely, Callista knowingly engaged in a sexual affair with another woman’s husband; she consciously facilitated the destruction of another couples’ marriage. And now she would be our First Lady? How do evangelical wives, mothers and voters feel about that?!

Why don’t Newt and Callista both apologize to Marianne, before they apologize to any “Christian conservative” interest group.

If the social conservative movement gets behind a man like Newt Gingrich, social conservatism is done for.

Any authentic social conservative ought to agree with Newt’s ex-wife Marianne, "I don't want him to be president and I don't think he should be" (Vanity Fair - Sep 1995) .
Posted by Jaayy on November 30, 2011 at 3:55 PM · Report this
14
If an apology must be made, why should Newt be the only one to apologize to evangelical women voters? Newt lived and slept with his present wife Callista while he was still married to his second wife Marianne. (NY Daily News - Aug 12, 1999). Was this adulterous cohabitation non-consensual?

More likely, Callista knowingly engaged in a sexual affair with another woman’s husband; she consciously facilitated the destruction of another couples’ marriage. And now she would be our First Lady? How do evangelical wives, mothers and voters feel about that?!

Why don’t Newt and Callista both apologize to Marianne, before they apologize to any “Christian conservative” interest group.

If the social conservative movement gets behind a man like Newt Gingrich, social conservatism is done for.

Any authentic social conservative ought to agree with Newt’s ex-wife Marianne, "I don't want him to be president and I don't think he should be" (Vanity Fair - Sep 1995).
Posted by Jaayy on November 30, 2011 at 4:05 PM · Report this

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