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Thursday, October 13, 2011

Comedy / 2012 News Flash to Herman Cain: Haagen Dazs Black Walnut Ice Cream So Unpopular, Haagen Dasz Stopped Selling It

Posted by on Thu, Oct 13, 2011 at 2:11 PM

As Slog tipper Gale says: "something completely silly, but it makes me happy." From the fact-checkers at Yahoo! News:

Now leading in at least one national poll, Cain is frequently asked if he is the new political flavor of the month. Cain’s canned response is: “Haagen-Dazs black walnut tastes good all the time.”

Here’s the problem: Haagen Dazs no longer makes black walnut ice cream... When contacted by ABC News, Hazel, at the Haagen-Daz customer service line, said, “We don’t sell black walnut. The sales nationally did not meet our expectations, unfortunately. It did not behoove us to continue with the product.”

Black walnut was, almost literally, a flavor of the month. Go Cain!

 

Comments (15) RSS

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Will in Seattle 1
I think he must have seen a coupon for it in the box of the SimCity game he used for his "plan" ...

Or was that Plan 9-9-9 From Outer Space?
Posted by Will in Seattle http://www.facebook.com/WillSeattle on October 13, 2011 at 2:14 PM
Fnarf 2
What kind of Communist eats ice cream called "Haagen Dazs"? That stuff is made in NORTH KOREA, Cain!
Posted by Fnarf http://www.facebook.com/fnarf on October 13, 2011 at 2:20 PM
rob! 3
So you're saying he should change his comeback to "Ben & Jerry's Schweddy Balls tastes good all the time"?
Posted by rob! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QZBdUceCL5U on October 13, 2011 at 2:28 PM
Vince 4
As Michele Bachmann would ask "Is it melting in HELL?"
Posted by Vince on October 13, 2011 at 2:37 PM
5
Now, I don't have the facts to back this up, but I think Black Walnut is the single most popular ice cream in America.
Posted by Proteus on October 13, 2011 at 2:38 PM
thatsnotright 6
@2 is right. Cain would eat some janky supermarket brand with lots of guar gum and milk substitutes. There's almost nothing natural anout God(awful)father's pizza either.
Posted by thatsnotright on October 13, 2011 at 2:44 PM
merry 7
HA ha!

points & laughs
Posted by merry on October 13, 2011 at 2:46 PM
DOUG. 8
Is he calling himself a walnut?
Posted by DOUG. http://www.dougsvotersguide.com on October 13, 2011 at 3:32 PM
aardvark 9
whole thing is a pornographic reference
Posted by aardvark on October 13, 2011 at 3:33 PM
10
Oh man. I can't even spell Haagen Dazs right...
Posted by Brendan Kiley on October 13, 2011 at 3:36 PM
venomlash 11
http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpres…
Posted by venomlash on October 13, 2011 at 3:43 PM
12
@10: But in your defense, Brendan, you are a drunken, gun-toting cracker. So we don't really expect you to know how to spell.
Posted by Goldy on October 13, 2011 at 3:46 PM
13
True, but at least I wasn't fool enough to call Nina Simone a "drunken, gun-toting cracker."

Count your lucky stars that she can't kick your ass from beyond the grave.
Posted by Brendan Kiley on October 13, 2011 at 3:49 PM
14
I'm not one to believe in the supernatural, but if anybody could kick my ass from beyond the grave, it would be Nina Simone.
Posted by Goldy on October 13, 2011 at 4:12 PM
15
I love Nina Simone even more than I love black walnut ice cream. Yum.
Posted by Small person in the corner on October 13, 2011 at 6:38 PM

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