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News & ArtsFriday, August 26, 2011
Life / Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz Unpaid Intern Breaks Up With Slog
Posted by Unpaid Intern on Fri, Aug 26, 2011 at 3:30 PM
Posted by *former* news intern Peter Johnson.
Dear Slog,
Here's the deal: I'm breaking up with you. It's been a long time coming, even though I used to admire you from afar, like in The Office. I was like Jim—dopey but adorable—and you were Pam: oblivious. I wanted it to work out so bad.
And then it happened—we got together (cue When Two Become One). And guess what? It sucked. Oh sure, you taught me a few things, like how to regurgitate police reports, hate tunnels, and fear pit bull attacks. But what does any of that do for me? I even had to share you with another intern. (It was supposed to be our desk!)
And let's not forget—you sure as hell didn't pay me.
So thanks for the "fun" times, that weird rash, and this water cup with its "Official Seal of Excellence" you gave me on our three-month anniversary. This cup that you tried to pass off as something special, even though you were too cheap to buy me a real cup made out of something fancy, like plastic. I hear the Seal of Excellence wasn't even yours—some other sad Unpaid Intern left it behind after you broke her heart.
So, I'm gone. This is one piece of sweet Unpaid Intern ass you won't ever get another look at.
Never again,
-PJ
- Paul Constant
- Totally disposable—like me. :(
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http://www.irishtimes.com/newspaper/brea…
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Even though The Stranger is an beehive of angry liberals who have taken liberties with journalistic principals with the decorum of a slut in Fairbanks after a long and cold winter, they still provided you an opportunity to learn and express yourself with the power of the written word.
So, for the confidence building and encouragement they gave you, this is the thanks they get?
Hey, sit down punk, you are way too full of yourself.
Anyone who takes an internship better have a passion for the profession at hand. Otherwise, what’s the point? Just stay at home and jack off?
You are not that profound in your dramatic exit. Instead, you made a complete ass of yourself.
Still, you are young and the potential is still there. It hasn’t gone away. The only way it will go away is if you stop believing in yourself.
“Of course, Braindrip, I believe in myself” you retort. “WTF are you talking about?”
Here’s the point: A person who believes in himself or herself, has the self-confidence to know that despite what other people think, they will continue to persevere (that includes being humiliated) on the path to success and to not let pettiness unearth a stepping stone to that success.
Grow up, Peter. You have it in you.
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Bye and good luck!
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