Lisa Dank just responded to the e-mail I sent her this morning, regarding the accusations that she was refusing to return the lost dog she found earlier this week.

After the booker at the Comet threatened to cancel Dank's appearance at the club tonight if she didn't return the dog, Dank tells me she will be meeting the owner in about an hour to give the dog back.

She says "perhaps the population would like to hear what actually happened," so her full response as to why she held on to the dog as log as she did is after the jump.

Hey megan,

Before I give this guy mel his dog back, perhaps the population would like to hear what actually happened that landed this dog in my arms.

On the eve of 4th of July my boyfriend and I set out on a long walk from Capitol Hill to Gasworks park so that I could erect a wheatpaste for the 4th. By the time we got there and finished the paste it was about 4 in the morning.

The moment we finished the paste, like a bat out of hell ran this little beast. He was running full speed (which is fast) to nowhere. He saw us and ran up to us-He was freezing cold and terrified. He had no collar on, we had to take him home. So we zipped him up into our jacket and walked home. He slept like an angel in the crux of my knee all night. The next morning was 4th of July and we both had to work so along came the dog. He had a breakfast of Mud Bay wet dog food, chilled on my lap at work, then kicked it all night.

He was quiet as a lamb during the fireworks.

Since finding him this dog will not let me leave his sight. I literally cannot go to the bathroom without him getting out of bed and following me. Everyone we meet because obviously he's been going everywhere with me keeps commenting on how much the dog loves me. Weird right?

Why have I not given the dog back to his rightful owner? Because I fear for the dog.

This dog is 2.5 years old and still has his balls on, his nails aren't clipped, he isn't tagged. He had diarrhea and kept sneezing. We have gone to the dog park for at least an hour every day since he found me and he is so poorly, inappropriately behaved with the other dogs. I really want to know what the hell this guy mel is doing with his dog! Why did he run away?

Mel sent me an email with embarrassing usage of quotation marks instead or apostrophes and spelled "Capitol Hill" "Capital Hill" which showed me this guy is somewhat of a moron and probably shouldn't own pets.

Then he sent me another saying the fireworks scared him, but there were no fireworks on the 3rd of July. He watched fireworks with us and didn't flinch. So now to me he is a liar. I don't trust this guy.

This dog is absolutely in love with me. If I didn't feel so strongly for this creature I wouldn't be putting my life and reputation on the line for it.

I spent all day yesterday on google scholar researching case studies regarding disputes such as this. Of course, common law is against my favor. It was worth a try.

I fucking love this dog and pray for him because I under no circumstances believe Mel is a fit owner. I am so afraid of what this guy is doing to this dog.

That said, I guess there is a warrant out for my arrest.

Bummer.

I'm meeting with Mel in an hour to give him back.

I hope everyone is happy now.

I love Musket. That's all.

I hope that helps.
Dank

Dank also just posted this to Twitter:

A day ago, she also posted this:

Update 8:03: Mel, the dog's owner, just e-mailed to say that Lisa has returned the dog. Welcome home, Benny!