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Friday, May 27, 2011

2012 Rick Santorum's Twitter Feed

Posted by Dan Savage on Fri, May 27, 2011 at 1:44 PM

A splattering of Rick's recent tweets...

Follow Santorum on Twitter here!

Comments (46) RSS

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HA!!!

Posted by sall on May 27, 2011 at 1:47 PM

Jesus christ, man: BLOOD IS NOT A LUBRICANT.

Posted by Fnarf

on May 27, 2011 at 1:54 PM

OMG!!

Posted by merry on May 27, 2011 at 1:55 PM

Pretty good punsmanship, but your post kind of implies that these are inadvertently-funny tweets from the man himself (http://twitter.com/#!/ricksantorum) rather than a deliberately-funny spoof account.

Posted by stuckie on May 27, 2011 at 1:57 PM

This is just like those people who think Onion postings are real! How timely.

Posted by christopher575 on May 27, 2011 at 1:58 PM

Goddammit, I was eating my lunch. Well, no more.

Posted by Geni on May 27, 2011 at 1:58 PM

The jokes just write themselves!

Posted by cat in a sweater on May 27, 2011 at 2:00 PM

oh this is the best. thank you dan :-)

Posted by mr. herriman on May 27, 2011 at 2:04 PM

I already spotted some of these in my RT stream -- whoever is behind this spoof account: well done!!

Posted by BEG

on May 27, 2011 at 2:04 PM

Cute.

Posted by venomlash on May 27, 2011 at 2:06 PM

I'm speechless. I am without speech!

Posted by laterite on May 27, 2011 at 2:07 PM

@5 No one can say I under estimate the intelligence of Republicans.

Posted by OuterCow on May 27, 2011 at 2:10 PM

Bloody Santorum? He needs to use more lube.

Posted by Anastasia Beaverhausen on May 27, 2011 at 2:11 PM

*snigger*

Posted by AngelaLansbury on May 27, 2011 at 2:11 PM

Oh, hellz yeah ya'll Santorum is toast(ewww) now...
Miley is on the case:

""IF WE ALLOW GAY MARRIAGE NEXT THING U KNOW PEOPLE WILL BE MARRYING GOLD FISH" - Rick Santorum
UO* contributed $13,000 to this mans campaign"

less than a minute ago via web Favorite
Retweet Reply
Gypsy Heart Tour
MileyCyrus
.....

and that's, uh, prettay cool.

UO*= Urban Outfitters

Posted by pissy mcslogbot on May 27, 2011 at 2:11 PM

But...but...but... he knows about his "google problem"! He MUST know how these could be read... Is he that clueless, or is he trying to be Savage.defying, or what?

Posted by Sketch on May 27, 2011 at 2:12 PM

Wow. Just...wow.

Posted by Lissa on May 27, 2011 at 2:12 PM

Stop it Rick, you're slaying me!

Posted by saxfanatic on May 27, 2011 at 2:15 PM

That's what he said.

Posted by echochamber on May 27, 2011 at 2:20 PM

I'm ... er ... glad (actually that should read "relieved", but then I have to be careful with what words I use, too) that there were only three tweets. Three too many, mind you.

Posted by Helenka (also a Canuck) on May 27, 2011 at 2:26 PM

ROFLMFAO - my monitor is covered in coke......

Posted by SiSiSodaPop in Vegas on May 27, 2011 at 2:32 PM

EEEEEK!

Posted by Clayton on May 27, 2011 at 2:37 PM

You can't write jokes funnier than that.

Posted by seandr on May 27, 2011 at 2:45 PM

"...Santorum will be on the lips of every young republican."

Ewwww. That's just nasty.

Posted by Frau Blucher on May 27, 2011 at 2:50 PM

Well done.

Posted by tehjakers on May 27, 2011 at 2:58 PM

Okay I know we're both married and I'm straight, but I swear to God I would do you for this. You rock, Dan. Thanks for the best belly laugh of the day.

Posted by skyweaver on May 27, 2011 at 3:04 PM

Dan, did you create this account?

Posted by sadini on May 27, 2011 at 3:24 PM

Some more recent samplings:

RickSantorumPR
My team is organizing the first rally of the campaign. We will show America that Santorum can fill a stadium to overflowing.
19 minutes ago

Rick Santorum PR
While you're enjoying those Memorial Day wieners with friends and family don't forget to spread a little Santorum at your BBQs this weekend!
23 minutes ago

RickSantorumPR
I stand ready to give America the extra push it needs to release its greatness on the world stage.
8 hours ago

Posted by this guy I know in Spokane on May 27, 2011 at 3:33 PM

@16: He didn't wrote it. It's a frigging joke. Not unlike the man himself, but that's not the point.

Posted by Kyrie on May 27, 2011 at 4:06 PM

Santorum filling a stadium to overflowing...!!! I laughed out loud. (Just doing my part with the link.)

Posted by Mattini on May 27, 2011 at 4:59 PM

@15: Urban Outfitters is evil, anyhow. Donations to Santorum are a small part of it.

Posted by Canadian Nurse on May 27, 2011 at 5:02 PM

UGH! Nasty nasty nasty.

Posted by dakoneko on May 27, 2011 at 8:11 PM

that's the funniest thing i've read, seen or heard in months!!

Posted by kevwin on May 27, 2011 at 9:10 PM

Ppl literally kill me!

Posted by madcap on May 27, 2011 at 11:08 PM

there's no way this is real. "santorum on the lips of every republican"? he did not say that. it's just too contrived.

Posted by ellarosa on May 27, 2011 at 11:22 PM

His picture being on the Tweet, and the official-looking Name, are kind of throwing people off.

But that's what makes this so delicioso!! Oh peeps! It's a well-crafted joke! So well-crafted it seems real.

Posted by Sandiai on May 27, 2011 at 11:36 PM

You could believe it's an unintended joke at the first. At the second one, that make you kind of gullible. After ten of those, they're really is no doubt. All the tweets are sex pun.

Posted by Kyrie on May 28, 2011 at 6:29 AM

Danny, this is some GREAT STUFF!

Be sure to write it on the walls of the bathroom stalls at your kid's Middle School.

Posted by clapclapclap on May 28, 2011 at 6:51 AM

I think he's actually developing a sense of humor.

Posted by niko4ever on May 28, 2011 at 7:13 AM

Are those real? Because if those are real, it's almost not fun anymore. He's making this way too easy.

Or could he have developed a sense of humor? Would a self-righteous, Puritanical moralist like him actually let himself make off-color jokes like that on purpose?

Posted by Daniel_NY on May 28, 2011 at 11:03 PM

Okay, I read a couple more of those. Not real, but funny as hell.

Posted by Daniel_NY on May 28, 2011 at 11:07 PM

Yeah, all you have to do is google 'twitter Rick Santorum' to figure out that's not his real twitter.

Posted by NoOneSpecial on May 29, 2011 at 5:38 PM

And not even dog pee can stop it.

“Dog pee can’t stop Santorum”
http://politicalinsider.blogs.heraldtrib…

Posted by stevekass on May 30, 2011 at 4:57 PM

Dan, when are you going to stop smearing Santorum?

Posted by KaraC

on May 30, 2011 at 5:22 PM

This is my real twitter feed! --> http://twitter.com/fakesantorum

Forget the new impostor! I have been spreading Santorum on Twitter for months!

http://twitter.com/fakesantorum

A sample: "I hear Sarah #Palin was in my former home state of PA today. I wonder if she took the #Hershey Highway like I always do."
Also: "Anthony Weiner's wiener is more qualified for presidency than most of my fellow candidates!"

You get the idea. :-)

Posted by Rick Santorum on May 30, 2011 at 7:48 PM

Santorum to run per Channel 69 in Allentown!

Posted by wylacot on May 31, 2011 at 1:11 PM