Telegraph:

Researchers have discovered the way men's bodies react to competition varies just like those of their closest cousins.

Whereas "status-striving" men tend to produce the macho hormone testosterone when challenged, like chimpanzees, laid-back men produce cortisol, nicknamed the cuddle compound, like bonobos.

Chimpanzees live in male-dominated societies where status is paramount and aggression can be severe, with frequent fights to the death.

In bonobos, a female is always the most dominant and tolerance can allow for more flexible co-operation and food-sharing.

They are often referred to as the "peace and love" apes.

Why not say it: Republicans in the purest sense are chimps; Democrats are bonobos. War on one side; welfare on the other.