In Case You Missed It: SPD officer Shandy Cobane will not be fired for Mexican-piss-stomping incident.

Pakistan Suicide Bomb Kills 80: "In claiming responsibility, the al-Qaida linked militant group cited anger at Pakistan's military for failing to stop the American incursion on their soil," reports the Associated Press.

Gadhafi Compound in Tripoli: Hit again by NATO after Gadhafi's first public appearance since last NATO strike.

Tacoma Gets Dumber: School board members vote to close two elementary schools.

License to Drill: House of Representatives approves bill to lift drilling moratorium.

Instant Karma: Man flees with donation jar from downtown Seattle business, gets hit by bus.

Such Good News: "An international study that included more than 1,700 couples showed that taking antiretroviral (ARV) drugs immediately, instead of waiting for the immune system to be weakened, led to a 96.3% reduction in HIV transmission to a sexual partner who does not carry the virus."

"Not That Hard": Philip Morris CEO on the alleged difficulty of quitting smoking.

She Sounds Pretty. I Hope She Gets Better.: Sultan woman with dog's head taken to hospital.

Finally, an amazing story of life in the 21st century, in which kids videotape an intoxicated man eating his napkin at Denny's, then post the video to YouTube, where it becomes a viral hit that eventually earns an introspective response from the abashed napkin eater, who works as the play-by-play announcer at Oregon State University. Here's the video that started it all. (NSF people who don't like kinda funny things that are really just sad.)