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Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Today in Bad Superhero Costume Design

Posted by on Tue, Apr 12, 2011 at 3:20 PM

It's a big day for super-hero costumes! Topless Robot has a roundup, including tidbits about the Wonder Woman costume (there are apparently optional shorts, people!) and a shot of the cast of the Batman play that will be touring Great Britain soon. But the exciting news of the day is this: Warner Bros. has just released shots of Ryan Reynolds' costume from the upcoming Green Lantern movie. Let's take a look:

Screen_shot_2011-04-12_at_2.51.02_PM.png

Okay, that white eyeball thing is really weird, but I guess it's faithful to the comic book. What's not faithful, though, is the weird ropy organic costume. But, whatever! Let's stay positive, right? I'm sure they'll make it work. Let's see what else those myth-makers at Hollywood have in store for us—AAAAAAAAGH!

Screen_shot_2011-04-12_at_2.53.07_PM.png

DEMON BABY EMBRYO TOES! EMERALD GREEN EMBRY-TOES! Green Lantern wears Vibram FiveFingers*, now? This is unacceptable. What's next, Spider-Crocs?

...Oh.

* Incidentally, if you ever can't remember the brand name of Vibram FiveFingers, they will be the first result if you Google "creepy toe shoes."

 

Comments (18) RSS

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Will in Seattle 1
Hulk smash.
Posted by Will in Seattle http://www.facebook.com/WillSeattle on April 12, 2011 at 3:41 PM
Joe Szilagyi 2
Uh, it looks actually nice considering the costume is actually supposed to be another of the magic green 'things' that the Green Lantern "magic ring" creates.

Have you linked the Wondercon footage yet? Because increasingly this film looks pretty bad ass.

Green Lantern is one of the most ridiculous superhero concepts out of all them: each "sector" of space is selected based on their morals to be a "space cop" and given a high science "power ring" that is so far ahead in science it's magic. They can create any object they can imagine, of any size, out of "hard light", and they have to say a special oath when they recharge their power rings every 24 hours. Oh, and they get their mandate as space cops from 30-trillion year old 2 foot tall blue aliens called the Guardians of the Galaxy, who have been around since or before the Big Bang.

They managed to make that look kinda cool. I can deal with toes.
Posted by Joe Szilagyi http://www.joeszilagyi.com on April 12, 2011 at 3:44 PM
Supreme Ruler Of The Universe 3

Did you ever read Adam West's autobiography?

He used to have a line of women outside his apartment who would wait to come in and get with him.

Reason? They were attracted to that cheesy, pantyhose type, Halloween-issue suit.

Would that happen to Ryan Reynolds in his Michelin Man special (better, yet, would he want it to happen...SLOG, be the experts)...
Posted by Supreme Ruler Of The Universe http://yrihf.com on April 12, 2011 at 3:45 PM
Reverse Polarity 4
If we can see his Green Hornet Toes through his costume, I insist that we be able to see his Green Hornet Wang as well. It only makes sense, amiright?
Posted by Reverse Polarity on April 12, 2011 at 3:53 PM
evilvolus 5
@4

LANTERNS ARE NOT HORNETS! GOOD NIGHT!

/morbo
Posted by evilvolus on April 12, 2011 at 3:59 PM
evilvolus 6
Most amazing comment over at Topless Robot (from MattKerr):

"In brightest day, with blackest dong!
No evil shall escape my wong!
Let those who think it isn't long,
Beware my privates: Green Lantern's schlong!"

@2 - I get what they're going for, considering the suit is a ring construct. However, the skin-tight visible-toe thing only makes any sense if Hal *strips* before activating the suit. Which the trailer clearly showed he doesn't.

Don't get me wrong. I'll definitely see it. I'll probably enjoy myself to some degree. But it seems like for every decision the filmmakers got right (Hector Hammond? Awesome!) they made pretty poor judgments somewhere else (the suit, Ryan Reynolds)
Posted by evilvolus on April 12, 2011 at 4:10 PM
gloomy gus 7
I am so excited to see this, even if it turns out to be not all one would wish. The Green Lantern was the only superhero whose main asset was his joory.

My mother had a giant green-stoned ring she said I could borrow. Therefore I was the badass Green Lantern of our little slice of Capitol HIil from age five to twelve.
Posted by gloomy gus on April 12, 2011 at 4:11 PM
Joe Szilagyi 8
@2 well it makes sense in that sort of "strips" logic if you consider that his jeans also become skin-tight tights, or a tuxedo turns into that suit. But beats me. As long as Kilowog calls someone poozer and they at least allude to the existence of Alan, Guy, John, Kyle, Gotham, or Metropolis, the movie will please me.
Posted by Joe Szilagyi http://www.joeszilagyi.com on April 12, 2011 at 4:33 PM
Joe Szilagyi 9
Er, that was @6.
Posted by Joe Szilagyi http://www.joeszilagyi.com on April 12, 2011 at 4:33 PM
Joe Szilagyi 10
@6 holy shit, I should have looked before I typed!! Behold, JOHN STEWART.
Posted by Joe Szilagyi http://www.joeszilagyi.com on April 12, 2011 at 4:35 PM
judgmentalist 11
THAT WAS EXACTLY WHAT I THOUGHT. This film is obviously trying to profit from the newfound popularity of barefoot running.

I hear the SInestro Corps will be wearing Nike Free Run + in the sequel.
Posted by judgmentalist http://judgmentalist.com/ on April 12, 2011 at 4:44 PM
this guy I know in Spokane 12
Never mind the toes, I'm a little disturbed that you can see his bones.
Posted by this guy I know in Spokane on April 12, 2011 at 6:06 PM
eclexia 13
"Watchman" broke the giant blue penis barrier for super-hero films. I think green boner is the least this film could add....
Posted by eclexia on April 12, 2011 at 7:50 PM
sirkowski 14
Is he vulnerable to the color yellow?
Posted by sirkowski http://www.missdynamite.com on April 12, 2011 at 8:10 PM
15
The animated Green Lantern First Flight looked better. (And is a decent film, too.)
Posted by seatackled on April 12, 2011 at 11:31 PM
Cato the Younger Younger 16
so we still can't have a black man as a mainstream super hero huh?
Posted by Cato the Younger Younger on April 13, 2011 at 7:01 AM
Fenrox 17
@16, DONALD GLOVER FOR SPIDERMAN! (Make it happen internet!)

This will be a terrible movie, I just hope it's SO TERRIBLE that it destroys Marvel and DC and all of comic books. That shit needs to get seriously destroyed so we can make comics better! (Online, more diversity, stories written in arcs)
Posted by Fenrox on April 13, 2011 at 1:46 PM
18
Do you like vibram five finger shoes, now it is very popular and has many fans, if you like it, don't wait but choose it. http://www.vibramfivefingersshoesusa.com…
Posted by vibramS five fingers on April 19, 2011 at 12:12 AM

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