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News & ArtsFriday, November 19, 2010
Hump The 2010 HUMP! Awards
Posted by Dan Savage on Fri, Nov 19, 2010 at 3:40 PM
Nuns stickin' it, twins doin' it, clowns jerkin' it: HUMP! 2010 had a little something for, and a little something from, everyone. But if you didn't make it to one of the twenty sold-out screenings at Seattle's On the Boards or Portland's Cinema 21 earlier this month—if you didn't beg, borrow, steal, or purchase one of the hottest tickets in town—you'll never know what you missed by missing HUMP! That's because HUMP! makes it possible for people to be porn stars for a couple of weekends and not the rest of their lives. Which is why there are no cell phones allowed at HUMP!, no HUMP! DVD collections, and no HUMP! films are posted online (well, not by us—some individual filmmaker have released their films online). And it's why we destroy all of our copies of the films after the last screening.
There's just only one thing left for us to do after our copies of the films have been destroyed at final HUMP! screening: count the votes. There are four prize categories this year—Best Humor, Best Kink, Best Sex, and Best In Show—and the winners are determined by audience ballot. And the winners of this year's HUMP! Awards are...
Best Humor:
Winner: America's Funniest Hump Videos ($1000)
First Runner Up: Sink ($250)Best Kink:
Winner: The Nun and the Bum Get Some ($1000)
First Runner Up: Playing With Fire ($250)Best Sex:
Winner: Ad Man ($1000)
First Runner Up: How to Bake Frosted Muffins ($250)Best In Show:
Grand Prize Winner: Hi, I'm Pon ($2500)
Congrats to everyone who entered HUMP!—everyone who entered a film and everyone who entered a screening—and we hope to see you all at HUMP! 2011! Watch www.thestranger.com/hump for details about next year's festival!
5
A recap of the winners would be scrumptious, since none of these things will be shown again (sorry aardvark). And, maybe it'd motivate some people to come into town next year for the next one? Just sayin'...
7
I totally support these films winning these categories, as I liked them all for these specific features, and I think I actually voted this way...And the "Hi, I'm Pon" film really was high quality, sexy, and emotional all at the same time. Really great!
8
I'm surprised "Its Get Better" didn't make the list, but otherwise, those were all worthy winners. In fact, though my only other screening was the year before, I thought that aside from these movies, the rest were very, very lacking. Much more disappointing when compared to last year's crop. I guess that means I'll just have to submit my own feature, cause compared to this year's selection, my future hit "Fat Lard Ass Jacking Off to Internet Porn" would make a strong run for BIS.
9
Thrilled that "Hi, I'm Pon" won but most of the rest of the winners are head scratchers...and, the best humor winners should be switched. "AFHV" was funny, but not very original. "Sink" was far wittier.
"How to Bake..." was BORING! If that's people's idea of good sex, then I'm horrified. "Ad Man" wasn't that hot...and where were the condoms?
"How to Bake..." was BORING! If that's people's idea of good sex, then I'm horrified. "Ad Man" wasn't that hot...and where were the condoms?
10
I though the "Ad Man" sex was the worst sex- and I'm a F-A-G! Who wants to see two guys with little wee-wee's (and one clearly on steroids)trying to get it on with no close up shots... At leat the straight stuff had closeups...
11
Can someone remind me what Sink was about? Was it one of the first couple films where the "pearl necklace" was actually a pearl necklace... kind of stop motiony?
12
Twin Sex was epic! Not even second place for humor? I just don't understand.
"Hi, I'm Pon" was so damn hot, though.
"Hi, I'm Pon" was so damn hot, though.
13
I'm kinda disappointed in that crazy Pon girl winning. Too long, no real sex, and the guy wasn't even annoyed at her for having sex in his place- she was just really crazy.
And I think the impact play "Fistful of Love" should have won over the lame fire play. I'm sure those people on screen were enjoying themselves, but it wasn't very engaging to me, someone who loves fire play.
But yeah, AFHV was super great and I'm glad it won. Should have won BIS.
And I think the impact play "Fistful of Love" should have won over the lame fire play. I'm sure those people on screen were enjoying themselves, but it wasn't very engaging to me, someone who loves fire play.
But yeah, AFHV was super great and I'm glad it won. Should have won BIS.
14
Congrats to the winners and everyone else who had films in HUMP 2010! You are awesome, creative and brave. Please ignore the shitty comments made by a few shitty people. May their genitalia be mercilessly scrutinized in hell.
15
@13: Seriously. I hated the Pon video. Boohoo the guy who cheated on his last girlfriend with me is now cheating on me. I never saw that one coming! Woe is me! Look I'm hip because I'm smoking in the bathtub. The only good part was the soundtrack, though being attached to that video did the XX a disservice.
16
WOW WE WONNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Pon and I are soooo THRILLED!!!!!
We're going to have a PARTY at our house in 2 weeks!!! We'll re-screen the film along with uncut photos and the VIDEO of when Mr. X came home unexpectedly! It's going to be a blast! You're all welcome!!! email me at ohshit@uw.edu and I'll send you the time and location! Serious! Come see my cock!
And we have our very own haters on this board! So cool!
WOOOHOOO thank you all for coming to see the film!! It was very emotionally difficult to make, as you might imagine. After 10 hours of editing photos of myself defiling another man's property... I was embarrassed, regretful, and wanted to withdraw the whole thing. It means a lot to see it was appreciated by you kind people.
And thank you Mr. X for signing the release form. I hope this is amusing to you.
Pon and I are soooo THRILLED!!!!!
We're going to have a PARTY at our house in 2 weeks!!! We'll re-screen the film along with uncut photos and the VIDEO of when Mr. X came home unexpectedly! It's going to be a blast! You're all welcome!!! email me at ohshit@uw.edu and I'll send you the time and location! Serious! Come see my cock!
And we have our very own haters on this board! So cool!
WOOOHOOO thank you all for coming to see the film!! It was very emotionally difficult to make, as you might imagine. After 10 hours of editing photos of myself defiling another man's property... I was embarrassed, regretful, and wanted to withdraw the whole thing. It means a lot to see it was appreciated by you kind people.
And thank you Mr. X for signing the release form. I hope this is amusing to you.
17
The only one I voted for that showed up was "Sink" in a runner-up position. Obviously, I have a different definition of kinky, sexy and best than everyone else.
And I absolutely hated the Pon video. Some insufferable hipster girl with the emotional range of a ten-year-old finds out her fuckbuddy didn't want to be her boyfriend and takes "revenge"? Why are we rewarding this shit? The girl needs to grow the fuck up.
And I absolutely hated the Pon video. Some insufferable hipster girl with the emotional range of a ten-year-old finds out her fuckbuddy didn't want to be her boyfriend and takes "revenge"? Why are we rewarding this shit? The girl needs to grow the fuck up.
18
"Fistful of Love" was robbed.
And "Pon" was creepy and passive-aggressive. Yuck. Glad to see "Ad Men" and "Funniest HUMP Videos" did well, though.
Ugh. I can't believe that "Pon" took it. That makes me feel bad inside.
And "Pon" was creepy and passive-aggressive. Yuck. Glad to see "Ad Men" and "Funniest HUMP Videos" did well, though.
Ugh. I can't believe that "Pon" took it. That makes me feel bad inside.
20
I hope all of the actors basked in the applause and and postive response! Ya'll inspired two amazing orgasms at my house! My pick for BIS won - definitely the most artful of the bunch. My b/f loved the Nun and thought she "sold it" awesomely. Overall many things to like - loved the real bodies, the wit, the variety, and being pushed out of my comfort zone. GO HUMP! (I mean it - go!)
21
<3 the haters. I would love to lick all of your cocks/pussies with my passive aggressive, cigarette smoking, cliche empty bathtub sitting tongue. I'm sorry I defiled your Holy Hump filmfest with my hipster, ten-year old mentality. I wish I could've been much more true to what porn actually is and means at it's most deepest most spiritual most artistic level. Unfortunately what it means to me is very extreme, passionate, and selfish. Hey, I'm just a product of our bubblegum, herd mentality, way-too-cool culture. Or, hold on, maybe the joke's on you. Maybe what porn is is a look at sex through affected, farcical lenses. Maybe the bathtub is a wink at all the bathtub scenes of hipsters past. Maybe the record over the boobs has been done a thousand times and will keep on being done just like people will continue to hurt people they purport to love. And omg, these things will keep happening EVEN IF you sit in your corner and are so indignant about it. Maybe if you can make a better one you should go, make one and put yourself on the judging table.
So go cry about it assholes. :) And I honestly hope that eventually you'll get to enjoy someone halfway as hot as I am.
So go cry about it assholes. :) And I honestly hope that eventually you'll get to enjoy someone halfway as hot as I am.
22
@toomim - congrats, I guess.
@Hi I'm Pon, (Having not seen the movie) I'd like to meet you, I think. You must be hot.
@Hi I'm Pon, (Having not seen the movie) I'd like to meet you, I think. You must be hot.
23
Wait a second, the infantile star of a whiny, passive-agressive humpfest entry has come to have a mini-meltdown on an internet comment section?!? I simply cannot believe it!
25
I did laugh the most at America's Funniest Hump Videos. I wish It get's better would have gotten a mention.
Nun and the Bum was boring, and hardly kinky. Fistful of Love was great, and totally robbed. The impact play between the two women was emotionally charged, which made the scene sexy to me. It was real.
AD man was cute. How to bake frosted muffins was just boring hetero sex interspersed with baking instructions. Yawn.
There seems to be a sharp Gender-divide in the love/hate for Pon. As a woman who has trusted people to treat me with respect, only to have that trust thrown back in my face, I totally got it. Pon was emotionally exploited by Mr. X, for sex, so she turned the tables.
My boyfriend, on the other hand, thought it was creepy.
Nun and the Bum was boring, and hardly kinky. Fistful of Love was great, and totally robbed. The impact play between the two women was emotionally charged, which made the scene sexy to me. It was real.
AD man was cute. How to bake frosted muffins was just boring hetero sex interspersed with baking instructions. Yawn.
There seems to be a sharp Gender-divide in the love/hate for Pon. As a woman who has trusted people to treat me with respect, only to have that trust thrown back in my face, I totally got it. Pon was emotionally exploited by Mr. X, for sex, so she turned the tables.
My boyfriend, on the other hand, thought it was creepy.
28
@26 "So proud of the Monrock crew for their excellent skills winning Best Humor. LURVES!!"
oh gross
oh gross
29
I heartily approve of the results of the Humor and Sex categories. I share several posters'... affront? affrontedness? that "Fistful of Love", easily the best Kink entry, didn't even rate runner-up. And I am utterly mystified by the BIS results. Or I was until I realized how much of the electorate must consist of self-obsessed hipsters themselves.
30
i didnt even see pon but i can tell we have some pretentious douche bags on our hands. congratulations! i guess ill be a hater as long as you post like 21. 16 youre fine.
21 you won ok? people are not going to unanimously kiss your ass so enjoy it and dont be so bratty.
21 you won ok? people are not going to unanimously kiss your ass so enjoy it and dont be so bratty.
31
@ Pon.
I thought the soundtrack was good, the photo's artistic and the story was involving.
I was a little disturbed and creeped out when it was discovered that you invited someone over to his place without permission. I am glad that the guy you invited over seems a little remorseful about doing it, but you Pon, that was vengeful and creepy.
You knew what kind of man he was and how he handled his relationships when you got involved with him. From what I could see he was honest with you and upfront then you go and do something like this over a text of boobs?
Trashy.
and then the post on here, talking like a brat. Acting like "HAHA got your money humpers! Now fuck off." Not cool.
Grow up.
I thought the soundtrack was good, the photo's artistic and the story was involving.
I was a little disturbed and creeped out when it was discovered that you invited someone over to his place without permission. I am glad that the guy you invited over seems a little remorseful about doing it, but you Pon, that was vengeful and creepy.
You knew what kind of man he was and how he handled his relationships when you got involved with him. From what I could see he was honest with you and upfront then you go and do something like this over a text of boobs?
Trashy.
and then the post on here, talking like a brat. Acting like "HAHA got your money humpers! Now fuck off." Not cool.
Grow up.
32
A little known fact (IIRC), "Pon" couldn't have won any other prize, I mean it was not "humorous", it wasn't "kinky", and it didn't have any "sex" in it. Just saying, know what I'm saying?
33
@32 Last years big wins didn't have orgasms and the funny winner didn't even have nudity. Hey Humpers please dont let Hump evolve into something I can bring my grandma to.
34
To the vocal minority hating on I am Pon:
It sounds like you would not do what she did.
I would like to point out how awesome it is for Pon to do something that none of you would do, capture it on film, and then present it to you in an engaging format so that you can experience it without doing it yourself. She made a great film. For YOU.
Also, Pon is hot and there was sex. Maybe you missed that part at the end where we fucked on his bed.
It sounds like you would not do what she did.
I would like to point out how awesome it is for Pon to do something that none of you would do, capture it on film, and then present it to you in an engaging format so that you can experience it without doing it yourself. She made a great film. For YOU.
Also, Pon is hot and there was sex. Maybe you missed that part at the end where we fucked on his bed.
35
@toomim
I remember that you and Pon had sex, but was there any penetration shots? I honestly don't recall and am asking. SFG #33 is right, sometimes this porn festival seems to be evolving into something "not quite porn".
I remember that you and Pon had sex, but was there any penetration shots? I honestly don't recall and am asking. SFG #33 is right, sometimes this porn festival seems to be evolving into something "not quite porn".
36
@35
yes
@33 & 35
I thought it had ALWAYS been a little less sexual, with clay & cartoons etc. Is this new?
yes
@33 & 35
I thought it had ALWAYS been a little less sexual, with clay & cartoons etc. Is this new?
37
Have any of the filmmakers posted their films online? Unfortunately I was out of town this year and not able to make it. But would like to see a few of the films if possible.
39
i totally read pon differently
i took it as a guy in love with a femme (didn't see any duct tape or tuck) who saved the pix she sent and ones he took when she moved to be close to him after her divorce.
she didn't want commitment and told him so
he got nosy and read a text from one of her gf's that contained a picture while he was sleeping over at her place.
she went to work and he invited her lookalike over, dressed the double in lover's lingerie and recreated all the pix he'd taken of lover with double. in her apartment. all over it. with her camera.
lover comes home mid action, sees, and leaves.
i won't say more except that i wept through the whole thing.
sometimes we get weak as humans and do f'd up sh't.
can't someone portray sorrow and regret and demonstrate that they understand just how screwed up they behaved and how much they destroyed with their mistakes?
it doesn't matter who was male or female (or even transintersex etc like me) but what mattered was making meaning from grief.
i will never forget it. i've been on both sides of that, and i'm glad someone could communicate it's poignant complexity.
i just wish i hadn't taken my dad this particular year, because as an ageplay kinkster, "Twincest" managed to squick me when he started yukking it up during the entry. didn't expect that, LOL
venus
i took it as a guy in love with a femme (didn't see any duct tape or tuck) who saved the pix she sent and ones he took when she moved to be close to him after her divorce.
she didn't want commitment and told him so
he got nosy and read a text from one of her gf's that contained a picture while he was sleeping over at her place.
she went to work and he invited her lookalike over, dressed the double in lover's lingerie and recreated all the pix he'd taken of lover with double. in her apartment. all over it. with her camera.
lover comes home mid action, sees, and leaves.
i won't say more except that i wept through the whole thing.
sometimes we get weak as humans and do f'd up sh't.
can't someone portray sorrow and regret and demonstrate that they understand just how screwed up they behaved and how much they destroyed with their mistakes?
it doesn't matter who was male or female (or even transintersex etc like me) but what mattered was making meaning from grief.
i will never forget it. i've been on both sides of that, and i'm glad someone could communicate it's poignant complexity.
i just wish i hadn't taken my dad this particular year, because as an ageplay kinkster, "Twincest" managed to squick me when he started yukking it up during the entry. didn't expect that, LOL
venus
40
Gah >.< I've been trying to find a good stop-motion sex piece with real actors forever (called Pixilation, fyi) but never had any luck. Then I find out about "Sink" and think "Yes! I've finally found something!" only to find out I can't get it now. Talk about an unfair case of blue balls... Is there any way to get ahold of that piece, since it won runner up in a category?
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