Slog

News & Arts

Line Out

Music & the City
at Night

« Dow Constantine Gets Up On A Table… | Meanwhile at the Red Door in Fremon… »

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Stranger Election Control Board The Deliciousness of Progressive Doom

Posted by Stranger Election Control Board on Tue, Nov 2, 2010 at 7:57 PM

When SECB arrived at the Westin's Elliott Bay Room where the progressive ballot measures are gathered to celebrate—or wallow—the first thing we noticed was the sparseness. There's nobody here.

The second thing we noticed was a "No on 1107" sign that came unmoored from the wall as soon as we walked in the door. The sign immediately leaped to the floor below, an apparent suicide.

The third thing we noticed, thanks to the huge TV screen on the wall: When did Tom Brokaw get old? He looks like Orville Redenbacher.

Anyway: As we wait for the Loko-flavored Sword of Damocles to fall down on our heads, we find that we have time for a food review. Here are two snack-sized servings of food favored by that most endangered of species, the Progressive Liberal Scum. The one on the left is a spicy bruschetta on a tiny, olive-oil-soaked piece of bread. Delicious! The one on the right is a hunk of avocado on top of a similarly soaked scrap of bread. Also delicious, but not as delicious as the bruschetta! Though we are surely hurtling toward a Red Tsunami the Likes of Which the World Has Never Seen in the History of Ever, we can be sure of one thing: Progressive Liberal Scum surely eat better than Conservative Running Dog Lackeys, who we hear dine exclusively on Jesus wafers and Burberry scarves. God bless A-Marx-ica!