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News & ArtsThursday, July 29, 2010
Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz Magic Fingers Will Lie to You
Posted by Cienna Madrid on Thu, Jul 29, 2010 at 4:35 PM
Doesn't a vibrating bed sound like a relaxing good time?
- It quickly carries you into the land of tingling relaxation and ease!
Especially a vibrating bed that promises Magic Fingers For Your Comfort that will Carry You Into the Land of Tingling Relaxation and Ease???
It's not. Despite it's 25-cent promises, you won't feel great. You'll feel like you're traveling down a gravel road on a high-speed bed bound for Hell. And when your journey's over and you're waiting for your ass to awaken, you'll realize that the only thing that could've made it more uncomfortable is if a stripper clown joined you for the ride.
2
I remember those. Haven't seen one in time out of mind, though. And the analogy about a bumpy road is right on the money.
3
I remember getting stuck in Ellensburg once when the pass was closed and my poor parents finding one of the last hotel rooms in town. It had one of these, and I was thrilled. My exhausted and cheap parents refused to spring the 25 cents for the ride though, and I was left forever wondering....
5
Speak for yourself, Miss Madrid. I have one on my bed at home and it's the epitome of camp. Back in my single days, it lead to some very hillarious situations.
Now if I could just get a beside console that controlled the lights and television, the bedroom would be just like a Howard Johnson's (the classic orange-roofed Howard Johnson's, not the feeble excuse that passes for a Howard Johnson's these days.)
Now if I could just get a beside console that controlled the lights and television, the bedroom would be just like a Howard Johnson's (the classic orange-roofed Howard Johnson's, not the feeble excuse that passes for a Howard Johnson's these days.)
6
i too slept in one of these circa 1972 at a motel somewhere near the rural midwest. i thought i was possessed.
10
The magic of Magic Fingers isn't in the 25-cent ride. It's in the tingling feeling it leaves you with lying still after the cycle is over (supposedly). And holy shit! I haven't seen Magic Fingers in a motel since the 60s.
13
@4, My recent Magic Fingers experience was in a motel in Idaho! To make the situation even creepier, my mother and I were sharing the bed.
14
The one and only time I rode one of those beds was 1978. All of us who have used this amenity are admitting to doing it over 3 decades ago, which means that the bed in question is pretty darn old. I wonder when they last changed the mattresses in that motel?
15
Haven't seen one of those since the 70's. On family ski trips from IN to Michigan we'd stay at dumpy hotels with these things. Me and baby sis on one, Dad and his current GF on the other. They were great after 10 hours of downhill on ice covered dirt mounds.
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