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News & ArtsThursday, July 29, 2010
Celeb I'm On Team Jake
Posted by Dan Savage on Thu, Jul 29, 2010 at 10:39 AM
Reese Witherspoon allegedly dumped Jake Gyllenhaal because he wouldn't give up pot for her.
1
Yes. I don't mind that you're gayer than the day is long...just don't smoke pot. And yes, my baby daddy is a huge stoner, but please, don't smoke pot. BS.
2
I dated a girl like that. She was very tense and not a relaxed person at all. Worked for Boeing defense dept and exclusively voted Republican because it helped her job. In addition to watching alot of Reality TV shows and listening to Pop40 KUBE 93, I had no choice but to break up with her.
3
The headline anticipates everyone's assumption: "THE REAL REASON REESE WITHERSPOON AND JAKE GYLLENHAAL BROKE UP -- NO, HE'S NOT GAY!"
7
Huh? Teams? You're saying you disagree with her choice to leave him for that reason? But it's her choice! She doesn't want her children raised around a chronic pot-smoker. So she left -- you're saying she should have stayed and compromised her own ethics? I'd say she did the right thing, because she recognized she and Jake weren't compatible. Normally you applaud that sort of awareness -- what gives? You're pro-pot before you're pro-smart relationship choices?
8
She didn't know he was a stoner when she entered the relationship? Maybe that was one of the things on her list to change about him to make him into the person partner. Good luck with that.
I've dumped boyfriends for far less. for example I broke up with one for always refusing to ride in our car with the top down as "It messes up my hair".
WTFWJD?
I've dumped boyfriends for far less. for example I broke up with one for always refusing to ride in our car with the top down as "It messes up my hair".
WTFWJD?
13
@5, booze hangovers last a day at worst. Pot hangovers make people slow and stupid for a freaking MONTH.
14
I smoked pot while maintaining a 4.0 gpa in college - and was stoned during most of the tests I took (it helps me think better).
15
Dated an alcoholic who would occasionally use pot to replace the booze... he refused to 'fess up about it when he went to rehab (he told me "don't say anything about it, they won't understand.").
The next guy I contemplated dating showed signs of the same tendencies, and I thought, no, I'm not going through that again!
So if Reese reached the same conclusion, what's wrong with that? She has young children to look after - refreshing to see a mother more concerned with the health and well-being of her kids than with her own dating.
The next guy I contemplated dating showed signs of the same tendencies, and I thought, no, I'm not going through that again!
So if Reese reached the same conclusion, what's wrong with that? She has young children to look after - refreshing to see a mother more concerned with the health and well-being of her kids than with her own dating.
17
@ 14. While you may be one of the few rare exceptions of known people to benefit from the use of pot, most people, including me, might as well be from planet mars for our uselessness while stoned. who knows what category JG falls into? and while I am all for the legalization of pot on a certain level, having experience working or dealing with martian stoners on a regular basis gives me some hesitation to totally commit to that cause.
20
I don't really see it as any different than alcohol -- if you're getting drunk/stoned more than, say, twice a week, or at times when I really wanted you not to be drunk/stoned (family events, etc.), then there's a problem. But a few drinks or a few hits a few times a week should not be a problem.
If she said "you can never smoke pot", then that's silly. But, I think we all probably know people who smoke way too much... I would definitely not be interested in dealing with a relationship with someone like that.
If she said "you can never smoke pot", then that's silly. But, I think we all probably know people who smoke way too much... I would definitely not be interested in dealing with a relationship with someone like that.
22
Both sides seem reasonable to me- he wanted to live his life the way he wanted and she didn't want to be with someone who was perpetually stoned. They weren't compatible, so she had the good sense to break it off rather than stay with him and drive each other nuts. I think they both win.
And yeah, totally gay.
And yeah, totally gay.
23
yeah, no need to take anyone's side. it's just an irreconcilable difference. no betrayal that i can see.
reese making a relationship choice for herself and her kids is nothing to get upset over. quite the opposite, in fact.
i am pro-pot in general, but i'm not a user, nor could i live with a chronic user. i don't judge anyone for it but i couldn't live around it.
reese making a relationship choice for herself and her kids is nothing to get upset over. quite the opposite, in fact.
i am pro-pot in general, but i'm not a user, nor could i live with a chronic user. i don't judge anyone for it but i couldn't live around it.
24
@16, not hangovers as in feeling sick. Hangovers in continuing to be under the influence long after you stop smoking it. Pot smokers never notice how slow they are, just like cigarette smokers never notice how bad their clothes reek.
26
Dude, Fnarf. You're dumb. I guess you don't need the weed then. Seriously.
....speaking as a member of the League of Successful Stoners, I gotta say, stonerism doesn't get to be a "deal breaker" if they were stoners when you met 'em.
(*Advocating "they" as a singular, non-gender pronoun. I hate "ze/zer/zir")
....speaking as a member of the League of Successful Stoners, I gotta say, stonerism doesn't get to be a "deal breaker" if they were stoners when you met 'em.
(*Advocating "they" as a singular, non-gender pronoun. I hate "ze/zer/zir")
28
OK, I merely speculated about the possibility the other day, but now I'm sure somebody dumb has hacked Fnarf's account. Seriously, if smoking a little bud slows down someone you know for an entire month, you should probably encourage him to see a doctor, because there is likely something very wrong with him.
stonerism doesn't get to be a "deal breaker" if they were stoners when you met 'em.Exactly. I've seen other girls pull this bait-and-switch, acting like it's totally cool that he smokes dope until things get serious, at which point of course he has to get clean, put on a tie, cut his hair, etc.
29
He could just be an obnoxious dumbass about it, you know?
Just like alcohol, some people can handle moderate consumption, some people can still function despite heavy consumption, and some people can't handle any level of consumption. It's a spectrum; for all we know, Jake turns into a blubbering, hungry idiot whenever he puffs a joint, and does so way too often.
Society's most obvious stoners are cut from that cloth: constantly listening to the same Bob Marley and Sublime songs, surrounded by junk food, perpetually lazy and unable to perform simple tasks like get off at the right bus stop. But god damn, I've met a lot of people in the past five years that I would never have suspected of smoking weed, only to later discover that they partake regularly and manage to behave like everyone else.
Just like alcohol, some people can handle moderate consumption, some people can still function despite heavy consumption, and some people can't handle any level of consumption. It's a spectrum; for all we know, Jake turns into a blubbering, hungry idiot whenever he puffs a joint, and does so way too often.
Society's most obvious stoners are cut from that cloth: constantly listening to the same Bob Marley and Sublime songs, surrounded by junk food, perpetually lazy and unable to perform simple tasks like get off at the right bus stop. But god damn, I've met a lot of people in the past five years that I would never have suspected of smoking weed, only to later discover that they partake regularly and manage to behave like everyone else.
33
To quote a comment on the article - The relationship between Jake Gyllenhaal and Reese Witherspoon was a contract. Sooooo many of these Hollywood types have contracts that require them to appear to be in relationships. WAKE UP!!!!
36
@24, thanks for clarifying what you meant by hangover, but for the most part I respectfully disagree. Pot certainly makes some people stupid, usually people who were already stupid. It can also make some very anxious, delusional or paranoid. Combining it with booze and/or bad nutrition can increase the stupid factor. But there are plenty of lawyers, authors, teachers, scientists, and even full time professional bloggers who use regularly and are not slowing down.
37
@29 word. I can't be on anyone's "team" here, because I have no idea what kind of stoner he was, how often he used, whether he was ever inappropriate, etc. I can envision any number of different scenarios which would cause be to be on either of their "teams" (and, as others pointed out, one where I'm on nobody's "team", they just had different lifestyles).
40
As far as press releases go...well, they both could use a hit, couldn't they? And if it's true that there's no such thing as bad press, there you go.
My sister just finished working with Reese shooting Water For Elephants. Says Reese was very nice to the crew (contradicting earlier hearsay) and was very professional. If she's all torn up over Jake, it certainly doesn't seem to be showing.
My sister just finished working with Reese shooting Water For Elephants. Says Reese was very nice to the crew (contradicting earlier hearsay) and was very professional. If she's all torn up over Jake, it certainly doesn't seem to be showing.
41
Fnarf, have you met most pot smokers? If you said, "Most pot smokers I've met are stupid when they're high and stay stupid for a month late," then that wouldn't be a baseless, prejudiced statement.
Personally, I've met many very intelligent pot smokers, scientists, professionals. But it would be silly if I said, "Most pot smokers are intelligent professionals."
Personally, I've met many very intelligent pot smokers, scientists, professionals. But it would be silly if I said, "Most pot smokers are intelligent professionals."
42
But Dan, I'm pretty sure you wouldn't date someone who smoked cigarettes. If the story is true, it seems to me that she's entitled to make the same sort of call about what she does and doesn't like in a person. (For the record, I object to neither...but get why others might.)
44
Why are so many people here convinced he's gay? I am genuinely curious. I know nothing about the guy.
45
Well, this is the biggest "whopper" in this century...so far..!!!!!..I have watched all of Jakes interviews this year...see ( a hedgehog doing karate, with jimmy fallon) for one...there is no way he can be that athletic (Prince of Persia) and be stoned at the same time...also He nails interviews....very intelligent, great sense of humor, .....If anyone believes THIS....they are dumber than a bag of hammers!!! and will believe ANYTHING.... including the gay rumors..... nobodys business why he and Reese broke up....I'm just saying......
46
@31- No, you can only "tell" with the ones you think you can tell about. Unless you're piss-testing everyone you interact with, which would be very awkward.
47
I had a boyfriend who refused to not smoke up when I wanted to say- hang out with him and not have to limit myself to conversations about how amazing hands are. Had no self control either, and admitted that he was smoking up way more than he wanted to. That can certainly put a damper on a relationship.
48
When I was younger I wouldn't have dated a woman who couldn't deal with the fact that I smoked pot a few times a week. I don't smoke pot now so that's not an issue but I wouldn't have a problem with a woman who smoked, as long as she wasn't stoned all the time.
49
She's a 30-something woman with children. If he wants to act like a 20 year old college student, that's his choice. But I emphathize with her need to have an adult partner in her life who isn't baked all the time (and BTW, being stoned all the time is different from indulging once in a while and the article was clear that Jake smoked a lot). Sounds to me like she's tired of fucking around and wants someone in her life who's ready to be serious and that wasn't Jake. Too bad too, because they were cute together.
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